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    Princess-IMYM's Avatar
    Princess-IMYM Posts: 239, Reputation: 6
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    #1

    Jul 16, 2008, 09:12 AM
    Hatred and argument
    I love to argue. :D
    I don't understand why but I love being angry at someone!
    Everyone tells me I'm a nice person and I'm so popular and no one talks about me behind my back, but the only reason I'm nice, is so people don't think I'm horrible, I'm charitable for selfish reasons.
    I posted before a while back about my, now ex, best friend, and I am filled with such hatred towards her, I hate it when she's happy or laughing, and I strongly dislike it when my friends talk to her, I wish she'd be miserable for the rest of her life, just so I can be angry at her for being stupid.
    I know this is wrong, but I can't help it, when she is upset, I'm over the moon.
    Is it possible to be this angry all the time? I get mad over the silliest of things, like if someone copies a word I say or an emoticon on msn I go into a radge.
    I like it when people talk about me behind my back, just so I can yell at them...
    I don't think this is normal, and I don't know what the cause is, does anyone else ever get like this?
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #2

    Jul 16, 2008, 09:17 AM
    It sounds like you are miserable and want everybody else to be miserable.
    Most people who are miserable with themselves wish everybody else was miserable too.
    Find some constructive outlets for your anger. Play basketball, join debates or something
    You could also try doing some volunteer work and learning compassion for the people who are really doing bad then maybe you can start to feel more for others.
    Talk to a counselor to get to the root of your anger too.
    Princess-IMYM's Avatar
    Princess-IMYM Posts: 239, Reputation: 6
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    #3

    Jul 16, 2008, 09:49 AM
    Im a happy person, I laugh a lot and love to write, and I hate pain
    I don't think I'm miserable, I just like seeing this one person upset, not others.
    I also despise sports to the very core and I'm extremely lazy when it comes to volunteering, I already work as a waitress and my compassion is tested with the elderly that I have to serve.
    I am compassionate about things, I think the developing countries should be given money and taught things for FREE so that they have as much chance of a full life as we do, and that anyone who harms a living creature should be locked away for several thousand years... (apart from hurting spiders)
    And I'm only 15, I can't go to a counselor because I don't have a clue where to find them or how to get to them, and my parents wouldn't care if I told them I thought I needed to go to one, they'd think I'm making it up, like they always do.
    0rphan's Avatar
    0rphan Posts: 1,282, Reputation: 240
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    #4

    Jul 16, 2008, 09:52 AM
    Hi Princess.. sounds like your holding a grievance somewhere, you sound very young, maybe teens, it could be that your attention seeking all the time, a bit like an infant would do, usually to have their own way.

    You don't mention your family.. could it be that within the family you think your getting a raw deal... maybe being put on a bit regarding family chores, perhaps your parents are not giving as much attention to you as maybe the other family members get, there for when out with friends or at school you tend to reflect your anger onto them!!

    I am only going by the information in your post, so I could be totally wrong, in which case ignore everything I have written.

    You need to channel you excess energy, maybe a sport.

    If the problem lies at home then, ask your family to take time out so that you can all discuss the problem together,hopefully all agreeing on a suitable solution,however if the home is not the problem then go and seek a counciller for some unbiast advice in how to deal with your anger management.

    I also think a visit to your Doctor might be useful as it could quite simply be ,that your hormones are running riot.

    I hope this helps.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #5

    Jul 16, 2008, 09:54 AM
    Something is causing you to be miserable with others.
    Is it more like you want to feel superior or better off than them then?
    Is there something little that irks you about them?
    Search your soul to figure it out.

    Only other thing I can think of is the 'voices' people get in their head to tempt them.
    But you have to fight that the same way you do any temptation.
    Princess-IMYM's Avatar
    Princess-IMYM Posts: 239, Reputation: 6
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    #6

    Jul 16, 2008, 10:01 AM
    Well, I USED to tell my mam that I was ill almost every week, and now she doesn't believe anything I say, I'm not loved anymore or less than anyone else in my family, and surprisingly me and my younger brother are more like good friends, we never argue, and if we do, it's because I take something of his without asking.
    The only problem I have with my family is with my dad, he scares me, I hate him, to me he's just a man that lives with us, but I still respect him, but for the wrong reasons (he gets into fights and has been in jail before)
    As I said, I hate sport with a vengeance.
    Princess-IMYM's Avatar
    Princess-IMYM Posts: 239, Reputation: 6
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    #7

    Jul 16, 2008, 10:02 AM
    I have heard 2 voices in the past year, once each, one was a girl who said "Don't go to school your ill." and I ignored her (after freaking out a bit) and the other was a man screaming at me, but I ignored him too.
    There isn't anything that should make me this angry, and I don't target my friends it just that one girl who I was best friends with for 4 years.
    I am better off, but I work for my money, and most of their parents are divorced, mine are together, and one of my best's father beats her :(
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #8

    Jul 16, 2008, 10:11 AM
    'voices' can be as little as a thought that is not your typical nature but a temptation.
    Like your friend left something somewhere and you found it. You always wanted it and something 'said' he won't ever know you found it. Keep it.
    Or you swear you are not going to the fridge for a 3 bowl of chocolate ice cream but you keep thinking about that bowl of ice cream.

    Any way you need to look deep inside yourself why you feel the way you do.

    With your dad it seems like he is not living up to what you feel a dad should be which is understandable but you have to look for some quality in him that you can find neutral grounds to not hate him.

    With your mom you need to have a talk and tell her something like I know I use to be a hypochondriac, but I quit that xx months ago and when I say I do not feel good it is for real. Please believe me.
    Princess-IMYM's Avatar
    Princess-IMYM Posts: 239, Reputation: 6
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    #9

    Jul 16, 2008, 10:15 AM
    I don't know why I'm angry though, the thing I most hate is being told off, because then I get argumentive, even with teachers.
    I cry easily too, and I thought that was because I was angry, I accept that I'm not nice, I know my faults, and I don't care what anyone else thinks.
    The only thing I like about my dad is that he's sucsessful, he has his own business, and my mam will just laugh if I try to tell her any of this. I love her, and used to idolise her but anything I say about my feelings she'll not listen.
    And I get urges like that, only I do return them, and I don't give into the temptations of eating, because it will be on my concience and its not a nice feeling.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #10

    Jul 16, 2008, 10:23 AM
    I am not saying your temptation is eating that is just an example.
    It sounds like you are just frustrated because you have no say in anything.
    You feel like your hands are tied no matter what you do or say.

    Your mother probably laughs because she doesn't know what to do, which isn't right but what some people do when they don't have a solution.
    Princess-IMYM's Avatar
    Princess-IMYM Posts: 239, Reputation: 6
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    #11

    Jul 16, 2008, 10:26 AM
    I meant that I ignore that type of temptation because even though I sometimes seem heartless, I do have morals.
    If I'm frustrated because I have no say, why am I like this all most all the time? Right now as I'm typing I feel like punching somebody in the face, and it started when I first wrote the question. It feels so stupid to be like this.

    I've been told to feed my brothers two guineapigs, they have no food or water and when I went to feed them, my dad told ME off for starving them, and called me a "F**king cruel b**ch" even though they belong to my brother and I have no responcability for them, its always ME that gets yelled at when it comes to our animals because I USED to absolutely adore pets, its unfair!
    0rphan's Avatar
    0rphan Posts: 1,282, Reputation: 240
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    #12

    Jul 16, 2008, 11:18 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Princess-IMYM
    Well, i USED to tell my mam that i was ill almost every week, and now she doesnt belive anything i say, im not loved anymore or less than anyone else in my family, and suprisingly me and my younger brother are more like good friends, we never argue, and if we do, it's because i take something of his without asking.
    The only problem i have with my family is with my dad, he scares me, i hate him, to me he's just a man that lives with us, but i still respect him, but for the wrong reasons (he gets into fights and has been in jail before)
    As i said, i hate sport with a vengence.
    Lots of things going on here: you say you hate your dad, he scares you, he fights and goes to jail... but you still respect him!!

    He, as you say is a successful business man, and yet still he fights and ends up in jail.. but still you respect him!

    You almost sound to me that you are mimicking his behaviour, after all despite jail he is still looked up to, which subconsciously tells you it's OK to behave as you do ( because my dad does and he's still successful), you mum ignores it because it's not unusual to her after all, she's seen it all before with your dad.

    This behaviour is not acceptable in today's society and will only fester into something more serious if not kept in check.

    The fact that you only refer to your dad as the man that lives with you, says to me that this is where you issues are... your dad

    Natually your brother is your friend there are no issues there apart from normal brotherly sister things that everyone has, he is the younger and in no way any threat, you look on him as an ally and so you will defend and protect him as such.

    The way you refer to your dad should tell you that his behaviour is wrong for him and also for you, if this situation continues then there must be some kind of organization that you could phone or arrange to go and see ,maybe with a trusted friend.
    I'm sure if you could air how you feel outloud where someone will give you the time to listen, then your anger will reduce to it's natural level.


    Note... these are my opinions and thoughts only
    Princess-IMYM's Avatar
    Princess-IMYM Posts: 239, Reputation: 6
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    #13

    Jul 16, 2008, 11:28 AM
    Well, My dad only went to jail for one night, he and my godfather were extremely angry and drunk and they drove a car into a reseraunt wall, this was before he married my mam I think. And then he only fights if someone else starts on him, or his friends are in trouble, he doesn't go round fighting for no reason.
    Why would I need an organization if I'm not bothered by the way my dad acts outside the home?
    My dad has a very short temper, and is quick to jump to conclusions about me, he likes my brother best but I don't mind, it means less attention from him
    CFZD's Avatar
    CFZD Posts: 385, Reputation: 49
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    #14

    Jul 17, 2008, 06:45 AM
    LOL, I am the opposite, I don't know how to argue or cry. We shall meet sometime.
    Princess-IMYM's Avatar
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    #15

    Jul 17, 2008, 08:21 AM
    My way of arguing is being sarcastic, then raising my voice and sort of crying cause I'm so angry, not in a child way though, I end up stressed and my neck hurts with pressure :mad:

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