[eric1361]

I'm 46 she's 39, been together 3 1/2 yrs. Been shaky the whole time. It had its good points but mostly bad, kind of hung in there hoping it would get better. Everything is her way or the highway, she's never wrong, 3 weeks ago she dumped me because I talk to someone at a party she didn't like. Here is her rule, if we go to a gathering or party or anything she tells me she's not my babysitter or my entertainment. And she takes off and leaves me, if she sees me there after OK, if not no big deal I can get over it. So I was left alone and I talk to someone and I was dump. So after that she used me to watch her dogs and let her use free cell service, finally last thur I put my foot down and ended everything, no more, I told her this and shut off the phone and haven't talk to her since, she's called acouple times everyday and this morning had the guts to text me and ask me if I miss her? I guess all the other times I went back like a fool she figured I would again. I kissed her , all she had to do was get out of bed and breath, I did the rest. I can't stand the thought of talking to her after being used and treated like crap. Do you think she is playing games and thinking ill come back, will she move on or will it get worse first. I won't go back or speak again.

[N0help4u]

No she isn't playing games she is spoiled and doesn't know any better.
Avoid her, you will never get through to her that she is wrong about anything because people like that can not face the facts of the matter.

[NorthernNiceGuy]

Definitely don't give in to her... She is obviously used to getting her own way and not having people stand up to her. Even when she texted you it was all about her. She's walking all over you my friend and you are doing the right thing by not giving in. Wait it out and see what happens. If she comes to you admitting all her wrongs than maybe consider giving it another go. But make sure if you do that you don't lose your backbone, and don't allow her to walk all over you.

I have seen girls like this in there 20's, and have seen them change after the guy they were with did what you did, but at 39 she may be too set in her ways to change.

I think NOhelp is exactly right though, this isn't a game to her, its just the way she is...

[confused1145]

I agree with everyone else she is spoiled and no don't give into her unless she can prove it';s going to change. Only time will tell.

[liz28]

I think you need to move on and don't worry or care if she do the time. If she been the same for 3 1/2 years, she'll be the way for the rest of your relationship.

She seems to act out like a 3 year old when she don't get her way and treated you the way she did because you allowed it. It's great that you finally put your foot down and will no longer take her crap.

Next time, find someone who is on the same page as you and treat you the same way you do them. You don't need a child but a partner who knows how to act like an adult.

As far as your ex, don't have any contact with him because she will try to get you back, but I guess you see you don't need her. Good luck in the future but leave the madness alone.

[JBeaucaire]

Next time around, be a little more quick on the judgement when the girl you're dating is turning out to NOT be someone you really want to be with. There is a tendency to "keep trying" anyway because of the time invested and that's wrong.

People should be free to be themselves. It takes a few months of dating for the "honeymoon" behavior to end and people start to act normal. At that point pay attention and move on more quickly if she's a bad match. Waste less of each other's time and keep the uncontrollable emotional bond from getting any stronger than it already is.

It's OK to make judgements. It's better to do that and move on than it is to STAY and try to make those same judgements, trying to get people to change. Bad mojo most of the time.

Good luck to you. You're doing great.

[talaniman]

I won't go back or speak again.

Just stick to your guns. Next time learn to stand up for yourself a lot sooner.

[LivingtheLifeinFLA]

Don't be surprised if her next move is to start dating someone else immediately to throw it in your face. If she does, DO NOT run back, confess your love, etc.

I realize this is a tough spot. You have someone you obviously care for and you get no respect.

This is what an insecure person does. They have to control someone else to feel good about them self.

Your life will be a nightmare if you stay.

[bigbird213]

I would run.

Its time to cut your losses and do what you know you need to do in your head. Don't let your head be won over by your heart. Your head things logically, your heart won't.

[hjpan]

Sounds like an insecure person.

[Tribune17]

Hi Eric, what is said here is as it is, she is spoilt but most of all from what you describe does not repect you, don't contact her and if she calls or texts say you are busy - there is a life out there mate, it is up to you to find it, take a holiday, even a single holiday am sure they do it in your territory - you will meet some great people for sure. Trust me if she is like this you are going to live a miserable life you need someone who you love to wake up too, who you cannot wait to see etc, if you dread moments with this one , it is a life of disaster for sure.

Good luck mate and remember those years with her were a learning experience, just don't carr that with you for anyone new you meet.

[eric1361]

I agree, she was the one I couldn't wait to see, but I had to make all the effort. To her it was more of a chore and your so right. I will get better and I will find true love, not this crap. Thank you

[sabrewolfe]

Yes she is playing games with you, but you are letting her do it! Put your foot down and leave it down. Nobody will have respect for you if you can't have it for yourself!