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    depressedhelp's Avatar
    depressedhelp Posts: 91, Reputation: 3
    Junior Member
     
    #1

    May 12, 2008, 03:28 PM
    She Is NOT A Mother!
    My so-called.
    "mother."
    is beingn very.. UGH lately..
    She's Not A Mother..
    No matter who says what.
    but anyway.
    she has accused me of doing drugs. [3 times]
    THINKS I'm going 2 get knocked up at the age of 14.
    she's just.. AHH
    me and my boyfriend..
    we're NOT stupid.
    she thinks I'm going to be some random whore
    like she was.
    "she had my half-brother.. unknowning who the father is."
    she's OMG.
    Helpp...
    PLEASE.
    Xrayman's Avatar
    Xrayman Posts: 1,177, Reputation: 193
    Ultra Member
     
    #2

    May 12, 2008, 03:30 PM
    Is this a series of coded statements, or are you asking a question?
    depressedhelp's Avatar
    depressedhelp Posts: 91, Reputation: 3
    Junior Member
     
    #3

    May 12, 2008, 03:32 PM
    I'm Asking.
    What Is Wrong With Her.
    And Can't I Just.
    Like.. DISAPPEAR.
    And Live With My Father.
    And Have Her Be Erased From The Picture.
    =/
    Xrayman's Avatar
    Xrayman Posts: 1,177, Reputation: 193
    Ultra Member
     
    #4

    May 12, 2008, 03:40 PM
    OK firstly, are you having sex with your BF?

    Is your mother concerned that you may end up pregnant (like her) before you can cope with a child?-I'd say she may even be concerned that if you have a child, SHE may end up having to care for it while you get an education.

    Is your BF able to sustain you financially/emotionally and STAY with you if you have a child? Is he a Lawyer/rocket scientist/doctor anything that will allow you to look after a baby/child? Or are you intending to become an educated young woman who doesn't NEED a man to look after her-if so, you will find this extremely difficult to do if you are a young woman with a baby.

    Get back to me...
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
    Expert
     
    #5

    May 12, 2008, 03:45 PM
    It is very likely your mother is trying to protect you. She knows the mistakes we make as kids until we learn better and often parents have to do things their kids don't understand or accept to protect them. For example at 14 you should not be having sex, period, so if she knows you are having sex, she also knows no birth control is 100 percent and she wants to protect you. She most likely knows at 14 the love of your life most likely will not be there in one or two more years so she is trying to let you be a child a little longer.

    And could perhaps some change in your behavior has her concerned, it sounds like your mom is very street smart and is trying to teach you some life lessons
    tai18's Avatar
    tai18 Posts: 130, Reputation: 2
    Junior Member
     
    #6

    May 12, 2008, 04:52 PM
    Maybe she thinks your to young to be having a boyfriend and is trying for you not to make misteaks that little 13 -16 year olds make like catching a std or getting pregnant and having your boyfriend walk out on you. . I think she's worried and fed up
    rockerchick_682's Avatar
    rockerchick_682 Posts: 496, Reputation: 72
    Full Member
     
    #7

    May 12, 2008, 04:59 PM
    Considering how many kids are getting knocked up these days and doing drugs, do you really blame her? Your mom obviously loves you. Otherwise she wouldn't care what you do. Try to think of it from her point of view. Would you want your daughter running out on you?
    depressedhelp's Avatar
    depressedhelp Posts: 91, Reputation: 3
    Junior Member
     
    #8

    May 12, 2008, 05:50 PM
    Im not having sex.
    that's the thing.
    I'm not a juvinille.
    I'm smart enough to not do that.
    this young.
    =]]
    Xrayman's Avatar
    Xrayman Posts: 1,177, Reputation: 193
    Ultra Member
     
    #9

    May 12, 2008, 06:29 PM
    How old is your BF? I'd imagine that your mother is a little concerned that although YOU might not want sex, you may be pressured into it by HIM.
    depressedhelp's Avatar
    depressedhelp Posts: 91, Reputation: 3
    Junior Member
     
    #10

    May 12, 2008, 06:49 PM
    He's 16; I'm 14.
    Xrayman's Avatar
    Xrayman Posts: 1,177, Reputation: 193
    Ultra Member
     
    #11

    May 12, 2008, 08:50 PM
    I'm a parent of a 14 year old. And as a man, I'd be worried about my daughter having a 16 year old BF. 16 yo boys don't generally want to be discussing flowers and unicorns and puppies-sorry to tell you but most boys are thinking about when and from whom they will get sex.

    Does your mother have reason to think you MAY be into drugs? Have you done it before? Has she caught you kanoodling /touching/kissing your BF?

    I think you may find she is being very careful for you-parents have a great thing called experience. It makes them sceptical.

    The best thing would be to explain your position about the not having sex etc. not doing drugs etc. to her in a frank discussion to ally her fears, if you are honest (and you can be trusted) she will feel a lot better and may just back-off.
    tai18's Avatar
    tai18 Posts: 130, Reputation: 2
    Junior Member
     
    #12

    May 13, 2008, 02:10 PM
    16 year olds minds are a little more developed then 14 year olds that kind of answers why your mother is angry or the way she is. Your still a child you should be focusing on school homework and friends but that's just my opinion, sooner or later your going to think about sex especially your boyfriend hese 16 , that's proberly why your mom thinks your going to get knocked up soon and also don't you think it is embarrassing for her as a mother to know that your 14 year old child has a boyfriend already ?maybe not to you now but when your older you'll understand more. What happens if your cousins or family members find out? Kind of embarrassing towards her. . she proberly feels like she's failing as a mom because of your behaviour. My opinion.
    booboobear's Avatar
    booboobear Posts: 23, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #13

    May 13, 2008, 03:55 PM
    Yea sweety she could just be concerned because he is a little older then you. Not that that would be a problem its just boys can be deceitful sometimes. Like said before she's just protecting you. As a young mother myself it is sometimes difficult especially if no one is there for you. I have my family so I am lucky. And I'm not with the father either. Sometimes things happen. I would just say since she also had a child at a young age she wants you to be able to enjoy life a little, get your education and then later do the grown up having baby things. Im lucky I'm native american and have help in different ways. And I work and do it all I'm OK but you should just try to get along with her. I had a little drama with my mother also but its just the age and the fact that she is pushing your buttons because she cares. Also how old is she? Maybe its menapause(or however spelt) LOL
    booboobear's Avatar
    booboobear Posts: 23, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #14

    May 13, 2008, 03:58 PM
    Uh yea no I don't think she'll go that far to think you're an embarrassment. If anything she should be ashamed of herself, She's THE PARENT. Meaning she puts food in your mouth and clothes on your back while you sleep under her roof. THings are not Free and especially not cheap now a days. If she dislikes it she would take action somehow. So I agree in the sense that 16 yes yr olds minds are more developed and she is just looking out for you. So yea, just had to say that.
    tai18's Avatar
    tai18 Posts: 130, Reputation: 2
    Junior Member
     
    #15

    May 13, 2008, 04:02 PM
    I never said she was a embarrissment at all. My words were "dont you think it is embarrassing for her as a mother " as A mother. Anyway hope my opinion helped bye:)
    jamie_n_maui's Avatar
    jamie_n_maui Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #16

    May 13, 2008, 04:09 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by depressedhelp
    My so-called.
    "mother."
    is beingn very.. UGH lately..
    Shes Not A Mother..
    No matter who says wat.
    but anyway.
    she has accused me of doing drugs. [3 times]
    THINKS i'm going 2 get knocked up at the age of 14.
    shes just.. AHH
    me and my boyfriend..
    we're NOT stupid.
    she thinks im going 2 be some random whore
    liek she was.
    "she had my half-brother.. unknowning who the father is."
    shes OMG.
    Helpp...
    PLEASE.
    Maybe you should just try talking to her. I'm only 19 and no I what its like ta feel that way about your mother, but after my dad died... I now no that my moms not going to be here forever, so try talking to her and try not ta look at bad side of it all maybe she just doesny want what happened ta her the same thing ta happen ta you.
    amberlynn's Avatar
    amberlynn Posts: 47, Reputation: -1
    -
     
    #17

    May 15, 2008, 09:18 AM
    Well I'm glad to hear your making good choices.
    But your mother is and will always be, a mother.
    Better yet, you're one and ONLY mother you will ever get to have.

    And the day she is gone you will feel dumb for ever posting this.
    I know parents are really something else.my mom asked me questions like that,
    Alllllll the tiiiiime!!

    And it irritated me that she would think I'm that stupid!
    Haha.but your mother clearly cares for you, and only wants the best for you.
    As dumb and cliché as that sounds.
    Find a way to spend good time with her.
    And you will see exactly what I mean.


    It is the solid truth.
    godsbabygirl267's Avatar
    godsbabygirl267 Posts: 175, Reputation: 11
    Junior Member
     
    #18

    May 17, 2008, 04:17 PM
    You are not going to want to hear this. But, most of the time, our parents are right. They really do know more than you believe in the current. She's just worried about you. After all, it is her job to protect you and make you a better person. So, she has to worry about you. That's what makes a good parent. Don't be so hard on her when she gives you advice or tries to tell you something you don't wish to hear. Its her job and she loves you or else , she wouldn't have any rules, she wouldn't cook you dinner, she wouldn't send you to school, she wouldn't talk to you when you have problems, she wouldn't care at all if you ran away and never came back. It sounds to me like you are just frustrated that she makes you follow the rules. Trust me. YOU WILL MISS HER AND ALL THE THINGS THAT BUG YOU NOW, YOU WILL WANT IT BACK WHEN SHE IS GONE. I promise, you will miss it, everysecond of it. Enjoy it while you can

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