[JohnEstate]

After my mothers death, my father changed the beneficiary on his 401k plan to "My Estate". He subsequently re-married. Before marrying he signed a pre nuptial that was pretty simplistic and simply said that his assets were to go to his children upon his death. He did NOT re-address the 401k. Recently, my father died, having been married to his second wife for 2 or 3 years. The 401k administrator informs us that upon re-marrying, the primary beneficiary automatically reverted to his new wife, unless he specifically once again designates the estate as the beneficiary. Since he never did so again upon re-marrying, the 401k goes to the second wife. Does this make sense? Are there steps I can take to keep the distribution in the family? Also, the second wife has indicated (probably only verbally) that she does not want the money as she recognizes that my father's intent with the pre nuptial was for the money to go to the children. Can she legally refuse the money and if she does, does it go to the estate?

[JudyKayTee]

After my mothers death, my father changed the beneficiary on his 401k plan to "My Estate". He subsequently re-married. Before marrying he signed a pre nuptial that was pretty simplistic and simply said that his assets were to go to his children upon his death. He did NOT re-address the 401k. Recently, my father died, having been married to his second wife for 2 or 3 years. The 401k administrator informs us that upon re-marrying, the primary beneficiary automatically reverted to his new wife, unless he specifically once again designates the estate as the beneficiary. Since he never did so again upon re-marrying, the 401k goes to the second wife. Does this make sense? Are there steps I can take to keep the distribution in the family? Also, the second wife has indicated (probably only verbally) that she does not want the money as she recognizes that my father's intent with the pre nuptial was for the money to go to the children. Can she legally refuse the money and if she does, does it go to the estate?

I have never heard the "automatic" beneficiary explanation before so, no, it makes no sense to me. That is not the case with my 401K.

The widow doesn't have to refuse the money - she can take it (and there will be taxes) and then hand it over to anyone she chooses.

I think you need an estate Attorney before this goes any further and the 401K is transferred into her name.