[txpriss26]

My boyfriend and I of over a year broke up recently. We dated for about one year before he bought a house and we moved in together for about three months. My time at his house was short because I felt like a stranger, invisible and miserable. He was constantly focused on house projects and our relationship almost didn't exist beyond me assisting with bills and/or house projects. He never introduced me to his friends, never took me anywhere, never said "I love you," never involved himself with my family, etc. We had some good times, things even began to improve towards the very end of our relationship until one day we got into a fight, I left abruptly and that was that.

Next thing you know, I get a message on Facebook from a coworker of his... A subordinate coworker of course. I had only met him once and he seemed nice enough. He told me that he heard the news and not to be sad, I could do better. After a little correspondence we decided to meet up for a drink because he said he had some things to tell me. He told me a lot of dirt about my ex that was very painful, it involved my ex's ex girlfriend among others, how he told him that he didn't love me the same way I loved him, etc etc. My ex's coworker told me that I need to move on from him, I can do better and that I'm being lead on...

I continued to see this guy and talk with him regularly and we developed a more romantic relationship. He finally told my ex that we were speaking to each other but he didn't go into further detail. My ex started to immediately backtrack on all of the stories he told and then he started pursuing me like crazy. He sent flowers, balloons, went to my parents house, sent me numerous text messages and emails.

I have not stopped seeing my ex's coworker ever since and it's been about a month. My ex is still in the picture however now my ex is starting to catch on to my relationship with his coworker. He's been prying through his coworker's emails and instant message logs. My ex is furious with me but he still only speculates about my relationship with his coworker.

Right now I am vexed because my ex is fighting back so hard, even going so far as to talk to my best friend who seems convinced that he's the one I should be with. She's afraid the new guy doesn't know me and is only trying to be a knight in shining armour to win the big prize and snatch away his boss's girl. I almost feel betrayed because my best friend knows how miserable I was with my ex but she also knows how much I loved him. Only problem is this guy is too new and I'm not sure of his motives... If I had to take him at face value I would say he has no motives, that he's just a great guy. I've spent so much time with this guy and my overall feelings?? JOY! PASSION! EXCITEMENT! We do so many fun things together, he's incredibly sweet and romantic. I want to be around him all the time!! Only problem is it's so soon and my emotions are still wrapped up in my ex. I know I still love him but I'm finding myself falling for this other person. He doesn't have the same financial standing but he has more integrity than anyone I've ever known.

So... my ex wants to see me, so does the other guy... They work together. This is awkward and terribly stressful for me. I feel like I'm spiraling out of control and I want to make a wise choice. I want to be happy and I the thought of losing either one of them is painful. My ex is backing me into a corner about my decision, no one will give me space to breathe. I don't know what to do!

[Breake]

My opinion, don't be sucked in by your EX! He only wants you now because you are speaking with his co-worker. Seems like a power issue for him.

Dont be sucked in, you know how he(the ex) is and what kind of life you will have should you choose to go back with him.

I'd say go NC with your ex, and ask the coworker to give you some time and talk casually if you are ready for that. You need time to sort your feelings out. Seems like you need some caring friends right now. Its not fair to the new guy to lead him on and allow him into your life on a dating level if you still have feelings for someone else Ask him for some time and if he genuinely cares, he will give you your time.

In the end this all your decision and you have to live with it. This is just my opinion.

[talaniman]

I want to make a wise choice.

The wise course of actions, is finish this business with the ex, and get others out of your business, and give yourself a chance to heal, from the death of this relationship, before you even think of someone else. You are vulnerable at this time, and may not be seeing reality, so don't just accept the invitations or friendship, of anyone especially not a rival of the ex. Clear your heart and head, before you risk them both. AGAIN!!