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Full Member
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Feb 27, 2008, 06:22 AM
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Would you be a stay at home dad?
These days there are many women have the ability to earn more than there male counter parts. Would you be a stay at home dad? Why? And Why not?
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BossMan
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Feb 27, 2008, 06:24 AM
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Yes, for sure.
I would dearly love to spend a lot more time with my children.
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Ultra Member
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Feb 28, 2008, 01:35 AM
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If my husband stayed home, we would have to hire a maid. Most men do not see the little maintenance details that must be done, sometimes over and over during a day. Maybe there are few guys out there that are up to the challenge. I haven't ever met one.
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New Member
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Feb 29, 2008, 12:32 PM
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I couldn't be a stay at home husband. Men are supposed to work that is in their chemical makeup. Its like telling a bird not to fly.
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Jobs & Parenting Expert
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Feb 29, 2008, 12:44 PM
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Originally Posted by Jaguarfan
Men are supposed to work that is in their chemical makeup.
Any man who does not think he would work if he stayed home to raise children and keep up the household is living in a dream world. I worked harder, had to be more creative, and used more problem-solving skills as a mom at home than I ever did working for a paycheck.
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Ultra Member
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Feb 29, 2008, 12:49 PM
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Originally Posted by Jaguarfan
I couldn't be a stay at home husband. Men are supposed to work that is in their chemical makeup. Its like telling a bird not to fly.
And women aren't? That is an extremely sexist remark. In case you haven't noticed, times have changed. Oh and comparing a man to a bird... doesn't work. Men can't fly. Humans can't fly.
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Full Member
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Feb 29, 2008, 12:52 PM
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I would love to be at home with my kids and take care of the house. It would be just like a stay at home mom though, you still need to allow yourself time to get out on your own and balance out your life.
I wish both my wife and I could be stay at home parents... I need to win the lottery ;-)
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Uber Member
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Mar 4, 2008, 11:33 AM
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I took 4 months of parental leave for our little girl, went back to work then got caught in the dot-com bust - laid off. So I was home with her for another 5 months. I didn't take time for our little guy because I had contract work. I would easily be a stay-at-dad.
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Uber Member
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Mar 4, 2008, 11:41 AM
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Originally Posted by simoneaugie
If my husband stayed home, we would have to hire a maid. Most men do not see the little maintenance details that must be done, sometimes over and over during the course of a day. Maybe there are few guys out there that are up to the challenge. I haven't ever met one.
This is a legit point. I quit my 9-5 a couple of years ago to stay at home with my son, as my wife's job was skyrocketting and she needed to travel a lot. Since then, I've done contract work and other work out of my home.. but been the primary caregiver when my son wasn't in pre-K.
Its been maddening and great. The days you play in the park are a dream. The days when he's a little three foot ball of angry fury, can be tough. And the point about keeping the home is real. I worked three times as long as my wife would to keep the house in remote, acceptable order. Just not wired for it. I want to do it well, but just don't seem to be as efficient. Esp with little mr chaos undoing all my good deeds behind me.
So... now being on the other side... where he's in school now and I'm not with him as much, I can say I'm glad I did it, but it wasn't always pretty. It was a blessing and it was infuriating. Mostly a blessing.
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Expert
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Mar 4, 2008, 11:55 AM
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A man came home from work and found his three Children outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard.
The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house and there was no sign of the dog. Proceeding into the house, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded against one wall. In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a Cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing. In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilt on the counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog food was spilt on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a Small pile of sand was spread by the back door.
He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she might be ill, or that something serious had happened.
He was met with a small trickle of water as it made its way out the bathroom door.
As he peered inside he found wet towels, scummy soap and more toys strewn over the floor. Miles of toilet paper lay in a heap and toothpaste had been smeared over the mirror and walls.
As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife still curled up in the bed in her pajamas, reading a novel. She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went. He looked at her bewildered and asked, "What Happened here today?"
She again smiled and answered, "You know every day when you come home from work
and you ask me what in the world I do all day?"
"Yes," was his incredulous reply.
She answered, "Well, today I didn't do it."
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Ultra Member
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Mar 4, 2008, 12:07 PM
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Point made! Haha that was a funny one!
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Uber Member
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Mar 4, 2008, 12:16 PM
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Syn... that's priceless
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Ultra Member
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Mar 5, 2008, 06:54 AM
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simoneaugie,
Where did that come from? So random!! Funny though...
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Full Member
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Mar 5, 2008, 07:16 AM
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Out of almost 300,000 members only one man was brave enough to say he would not be a stay at home dad. This is crazy because there are women out there that wouldn't allow there men to even consider staying home. The attitude is if I have to work so do you!
I could only shake my head at the stopping bird from flying comment.
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Expert
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Mar 5, 2008, 07:46 AM
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If I COULD make more than my husband, AND we had kids, AND he could clean to my standards, I'd bless him for wanting to be a stay-at-home dad.
However, he has more education than I do, and has made more than twice as much as I have then entire time we've been together. I've also given up jobs to follow him in moves when he was promoted across the country--so his career always came before mine.
IF, all of a sudden, he changed his mind and wanted to be the one to cook and clean and keep house and watch kids once they're born--I'd beat him senseless. In my opinion, the decision on THAT was made long ago, when his career made it so that I've had several jobs over the last ten years--which just doesn't look good when you're trying to get hired or promoted.
I don't have a problem with stay at home dads, I think it's GREAT that there are guys out there that want to, which allows their wives to pursue a career, which, in the end, will end up with more women in higher paying jobs than currently exists.
I just think that actions within the relationship, WELL before kids are born, determine who is going to stay at home, if anyone does.
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Ultra Member
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Mar 5, 2008, 08:49 AM
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Originally Posted by Marriedguy
Out of almost 300,000 members only one man was brave enough to say he would not be a stay at home dad. This is crazy because there are women out there that wouldnt allow there men to even consider staying home. The attitude is if I have to work so do you!
I could only shake my head at the stopping bird from flying comment.
I didn't start it... well maybe I did but I was trying to make a point... :rolleyes:
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Senior Member
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Mar 5, 2008, 09:17 AM
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Hell yeah I would! It's something I aspire to do one day!
(Moomin, if you're reading this, and I know you will, stop your ovaries from screaming - I said ONE DAY! He he he!)
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Uber Member
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Mar 5, 2008, 09:24 AM
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Originally Posted by Marriedguy
Out of almost 300,000 members only one man was brave enough to say he would not be a stay at home dad. This is crazy because there are women out there that wouldnt allow there men to even consider staying home. The attitude is if I have to work so do you!
I take some exception to this comment "brave enough"... as if him saying he couldn't do it was a more noble thing that someone saying they would (btw... jaguarfan... I take no exception to your post, not at all. You were honest, but not "more honest" than others as I was later implied)
I quit teaching at a university, when our oldest was just entering college, after just buying a bigger home, to raise my son, while getting my income through a small business and through independent contract work. At the same time I had to do a lot of things which were not particularly easy or natural, such as the house stuff and dealing with a grumpy 2 year old. You think that was easy? Cutting a guaranteed income with a kid in college and one in diapers?
Not sure how you ask for opinions and then decide the only valid one is the guy who says he couldn't. Its true a lot of guys wouldn't want to, and its true some partners play the "if i have to go to work so do you" card... but stop making his comment out to be the only "brave" one made.
I don't get the tone here... on one hand you seem to be chiding women for not letting their men stay at home, and on the other you applaud only the guy who said he couldn't do it?
What's your angle here? Maybe I'm just reading it wrong.
Your OP was "would you be a stay at home dad... why or why not"... so I'm guessing you wanted to hear men say their wives wouldn't let them?
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Uber Member
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Mar 5, 2008, 09:25 AM
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I thought the same thing when I read that kp.
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Junior Member
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Mar 5, 2008, 09:59 AM
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Originally Posted by iAMfromHuntersBar
Hell yeah I would! It's something I aspire to do one day!
(Moomin, if you're reading this, and I know you will, stop your ovaries from screaming - I said ONE DAY! He he he!)
*ovaries go insane*
One day! Hehe!
Not before for we're... Never mind!
:eek:
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