[Synnen]

It's not the COST of condoms.

It's the fact that they don't have to answer questions from their parents if they find baggies or aluminum foil in their rooms.

[Alty]

Good point. But still, aluminum foil, Ouch! No wonder they'd rather have unprotected sex, this might also explain why so many teenage girls are experiencing pain when having sex. I say again, aluminum foil, Ouch!

[jillianleab]

aluminum foil were good subs for condoms.

YEEOOOUUUCHHHH!!!! :eek:

What the hell is the matter with people?? :confused:

And I'd be willing to guess teen pregnancy might be down, but teen internet usage is up - that's why we have so many pregnant teens visiting us here...

[Alty]

Jillian - True, but what amazes me more is the fact that these teens obviously know how to use the internet, why not look up safe sex practices. Google and learn, it's not brain surgery.

And I say again, aluminum foil, Ouch, full body shiver and not in a good way.

[MommaOmy]

I personally think that the Mothers and Fathers need to be more PRO-ACTIVE with There Children! I have 4 Children and my oldest is a 14 year old boy and I stalk him as he calls it! I check his myspace and monitor his phone calls and his friends as well.. I know the Good the bad and the UGLY of what is going on in his life... I see what the other kids are up too girls messing around with girls boys messing with boys and girls and boys having sexual relationships way earlier and earlier, no this is not a huge change from when I was a child (teen) but it is allot more of just not thinking of what may happen babies having babies, STD and mixing drugs into the hole thing its not fun to be a parent but it is our Duty as Mothers and Father to DO OUR JOB!! Teach our children Rite and Wrong! Dangers etc... When our Children where small we would say no don't touch the stove its hot!! Montior what they put in there mouth so they would not choke... I personally will watch over (stalk) as my teen puts it! All 4 of my children Till the day I die! Parental DUTY and LOVE!! Not an easy job but My job and Im happy to do it!

[0rphan]

Hi Altenweg,

I think it's like everything else these days, teenagers do what ever when ever they like, knowing they are not going to be punished.

Schools have no control, parents have no control and Police have more important issues,so it's a case of... don't tell me what to do,I'll do what I want with whom I want, there is nothing you can do about it, so... bleep bleep bleep off.


Total lack of respect for themselves and everything around them.

[Credendovidis]

Total lack of respect for themselves and everything around them.

And if that is true : what can you conclude from that statement?
Are it the teens, or is it the society in its entirety that is rotten to the core, and is the behavior of teens not simply a reflection of that?

In my views any society that mainly focuses on it's own interests and needs is the cause of the problems you described...

:rolleyes:

·

[0rphan]

HI Credendavidis,

You can conclude from my previous statement that: things need to change regarding the upbringing of our children, who are the adults of the future.

What ever they are taught when they are young is how they will lead their life in society when growing older, progressing from a cheeky child to an argumentative teenager and onto an aggressive adult.

No, society is not rotten to the core yet, but if these young people have no respect or values or moral codes, eventually when all people are replaced by the teens of today, then society may very well be rotten to the core... it has to change now.

The behavior of the teens are a reflection of various things: Their home life and the way parents are raising them.. our government, changing the rules in society regarding discipline... our police force knowing who the culprits are, regarding theft, arson, vandalism,muggings etc etc... not able to do a thing about it... a slap on the wrist is the usual and don't do it again lads,because it's too much paper work and what's the point they'll get a fine which won't be paid, plus there aren't enough police on the beat so...
let off yet again... this has to stop

Society has to have some form of order, it's like any thing... solid foundation... preparation... brilliant long lasting result.

A child needs solid foundation that he can rely upon,knowing that it will show him the right way in life correcting him when he takes a wrong turn, not allowing him to continue on the wrong track which eventually will be his downfall... discipline is the key to a respectful society.

just my opinion

[Credendovidis]

No, society is not rotten to the core yet, but if these young people have no respect or values or moral codes, eventually when all people are replaced by the teens of today, then society may very well be rotten to the core.....it has to change now.

I disagree. A society that allows nukes to be stockpiled, that allows and supports countries to be invaded on non-issue arguments, that focuses on personal wealth and gain, that allows - if not enforces - people to be living in a world above their means, that does not focus on the own poverty and need, nor on the poverty and need in the rest of the world, such a society is rotten to the core : that is a society that is rotten to it's core.

A child needs solid foundation that he can rely upon. And that foundation starts with parents being there for their children, even if that requires one less car, one less holiday, one less purchase, or less available means for financing unnecessary luxury purchases.

That that is the real cause of the mentioned problem is my opinion !

:)

[0rphan]

Whilst I agree with your first paragraph , I'll also add that these decisions you speak off are government made, adults in society, which is exactly my point...

The question being... why are so many teens getting pregnant ?

My opinion is stated on previous post ,which I stand by... discipline

[Synnen]

I disagree. A society that allows nukes to be stockpiled, that allows and supports countries to be invaded on non-issue arguments, that focuses on personal wealth and gain, that allows - if not enforces - people to be living in a world above their means, that does not focus on the own poverty and need, nor on the poverty and need in the rest of the world, such a society is rotten to the core : that is a society that is rotten to it's core.

A child needs solid foundation that he can rely upon. And that foundation starts with parents being there for their children, even if that requires one less car, one less holiday, one less purchase, or less available means for financing unnecessary luxury purchases.

That that is the real cause of the mentioned problem is my opinion !

:)

I'd like to point out that it's ALSO a society that has such things as:
Big Brothers Big Sisters
Habitat for Humanity
People who feed and shelter the homeless
The Salvation Army
Toys for Tots
And hundreds and thousands of volunteers for pretty much any kind of need you can think of.

You may not always SEE the good, because it is not as focused on as the bad by the media, but it's there. For example, a group of people I work with and I donate to the Domestic Abuse shelter all of the "free" part of the "buy one get one free" deals at the grocery store. What the shelter can't use goes to the soup kitchen down the street. I know pretty much everyone on this board gives to someone or something to help.

So... it's not ALL evilness and selfishness. It's the fact that we have an entire generation of kids that ANYONE could be in Little League, or make the football team, or could be a cheerleader, because we can't EXCLUDE anyway. It's a generation of "No Child Left Behind", and of kids expecting everything to be fair ALL of the time. Lack of personal responsibility for anything runs rampant, and THAT is the true vice of today's society.

[Credendovidis]

So...it's not ALL evilness and selfishness.

I never suggested that. I stated that such a society is rotten to the core.
And when the shoe fits...

===

My opinion is stated on previous post ,which i stand by.....discipline

Discipline requires parential involvement. As I stated :

"A child needs solid foundation that he can rely upon. And that foundation starts with parents being there for their children, even if that requires one less car, one less holiday, one less purchase, or less available means for financing unnecessary luxury purchases. That (lacking parential involvement) is the real cause of the mentioned problem in my opinion !"

:rolleyes:

·

[Alty]

I have to say that as a mother I'm doing everything I can to prepare my kids to make good choices in their lives. Will they always do what I say, definitely not, some things must be learned from first hand experience, trial and error.

Having said that, I talk to them, let them know that they can talk to me about anything, everything, no matter what. Will I get mad, I'm sure I will, but I will listen and I will give them support. My hope, when they are about to do something they hear my voice in their head and hopefully they listen to it.

I was no angel when I was younger, but it wasn't because I had bad parents, in fact, I had wonderful parents, couldn't have asked for better. They were supportive, loving, kind and caring. I pulled the wool over their eyes many times, I wish I could take it all back, but what's done is done. I got lucky, others weren't so lucky.

What I'm trying to say with this thread, well, teens today don't seem to know anything about the consequences of sex. We recently had a teen ask if she could become pregnant because she and her boyfriend had oral sex. We have tons of teens that think that the "pull out" method works. Were is sex education? Do we really think that teaching abstinence in schools is going to work? I think that the proof is in the pudding, maybe the educators should come on this site and see how well their teaching is working.

Sorry, vent, just answered another "Could I be pregnant" thread, it's getting old fast. :(

[N0help4u]

Exactly what I have been saying. Sex education in schools seems to have gotten to be something the schools condone and encourage, They push it in the classrooms and keep the parents in the dark encouraging them to not inform their parents.

[0rphan]

Exactly what I have been saying. Sex education in schools seems to have gotten to be something the schools condone and encourage, They push it in the classrooms and keep the parents in the dark encouraging them to not inform their parents.

Yes I agree there Nohelp... I must be getting old because when I was at school, you just didn't mention sex openly, there was lots of sniggering behind the toilets kind of thing, but that was it.

Now it's talked about like an every day occurrence, it's deemed to be cool if you do it especially with the latest hot guy on the scene. Many kids come in where I work majority with babies, they can't be any older than 14/15, their mates laughing and joke around even to the point of taking the babies into the local pub which is now open 24 hours, a baby these days seems to be a street cred' thing.They drag it along like it's the latest fashion accessary, never any mention of the Dad though I notice.

I know society moves onwards and upwards but as far as this issue is concerned not for the better.
I always thought a sexual relationship was private between 2 people who love each other, But it seems it's just something else on offer after a night on the town... ok call me old fashioned but I find that really sad.


Bye for now

[Allheart]

I'm not quite sure what the answer is. I am not even sure if there is a rise in teenanger pregancy. Perhaps it's just more noticeable now, I don't know.

My mom had 5 girls and let me tell you, none of us got pregnant or even had sex to we were well out of the house. Mom would go on and on and on, and most times I hand no clue what in the God's name she was talking about.

We didn't have sex ed in school. But if I were a parent, frankly, I would not want to leave that subject up to them. I would want to be the one to teach my young girl the value of her body, and if it were my son, I would teach him to value girls and all that goes with it.

Thankfully I was so shy during those years, the last thing on my mind was sex with a boy.
I had so much preaching in my head between Mom and school, and I saw the sad results of when girls did get pregnant, and the anquish they suffered, I just didn't get why girls so young would put themselves in such a position.

Mom was the best birth control that I needed and I don't think it would have had the same impact if I got it in school. She clearly stated how she felt about young girls having such and that part of it I did understand. Her methods may have been harsh, but all 5 of us got the message and adhered to her warnings.

If I were a parent, quite frankly, I want the teachings coming from home, and I would be furious if they gave my child a condomn or some other sort of birth control. That is not their job, that would be mine and mine alone. Their job is to teach, math, science and the like, morals and personal responsibility have to start and be taught in the home.

I will say in high school they showed us a production about abortion and it was horrifying, but that's the closest they came to any type of sex ed. And quite frankly, after all these years, that teaching still is implanted in my mind and heart.

I also remember going to parties, and my girlfriends who were dating, and soon as they left the room, their boyfriends were canvasing the other girls in the room, as that is what young boys do, with those hormones raging. I would sit there and think, you've got to be kidding me. And that pretty much turned me off as I could see what Mom meant at that point " Boys at that age are really only interested in one thing". That may not be entirely true, but it was enough for me to say, "Sorry, I am just too valuable for you to want to use because you can't think straight".

[N0help4u]

Yes i agree there Nohelp.....i must be getting old because when i was at school, you just didn't mention sex openly, there was lots of sniggering behind the toilets kind of thing, but that was it.

Now it's talked about like an every day occurrence, it's deemed to be cool if you do it especially with the latest hot guy on the scene. Many kids come in where i work majority with babies, they can't be any older than 14/15, their mates laughing and joke around even to the point of taking the babies into the local pub which is now open 24 hours, a baby these days seems to be a street cred' thing.They drag it along like it's the latest fashion accessary, never any mention of the Dad though i notice.

I know society moves onwards and upwards but as far as this issue is concerned not for the better.
I always thought a sexual relationship was private between 2 people who love each other, But it seems it's just something else on offer after a night on the town.........ok call me old fashioned but i find that really sad.

Bye for now

I agree it is not always for the better. Sex education is a lot of indoctrinating kids to look at sex as nothing more than an urge to follow with protection. They start them out way early putting condoms of produce and telling them basically in so many words 'if it feels good (to the both of you) do it'

[Synnen]

Are you people kidding?

Sex education in the schools these days has so little to do with protection it's not even funny. The "Abstinence based" education is an absolute failure--not because the schools are teaching "if it feels good, protect yourself and do it" but because they're doing the opposite "don't do it! don't do it! don't do it!"

As far as I'm concerned, it should be a JOINT effort--both the schools and the parents. The schools should teach the most up to date forms of birth control and EXACTLY how they're used, along with the side effects. Schools should also be the ones to give the statistics on STDs, and the symptoms of them. The reason I say the schools for these things is that it's easier to get that sort of information to schools than to all of the parents in the school.

The MORAL aspect of sex ed--WHY you shouldn't have sex before whenever (whether that's marriage, or age 18, or "you're out of my house")--should be up to the parent. I absolute do NOT want schools to teach my kids morals, and I'll admit it's because I don't want my kids grounded solely in Christian morals which tend to be limiting in many ways. I plan to teach my kids by EXAMPLE why it's good to respect your body, and to understand what the consequences are to living in my home if they come home pregnant.

The problem isn't really the schools or the parents, you know.

The problem is that these girls KNOW they can afford to keep their babies if they get pregnant. WIC and food stamps and subsidized housing, and free day care while they're in school and scholarships for college--hell, who Wouldn't want to get pregnant young and get all that stuff when you're starting, rather than waiting until you're older and have to pay for it all by yourself?

Honestly--it's not that sex and pregnancy by teens is really any higher than it used to be (I've got that stats for that somewhere), but the rate of unmarried teens giving birth has gone up from 15% to 75% since 1960 (got that from the CDC http://jama.ama-assn.org/cgi/reprint/283/3/326.pdf ), but honestly---I wonder if the rate of happy marriages has changed in that time? I know MY parents love each other, but they also got married because they "had to" when my mom got pregnant with me. So do we go back to people HAVING to get married when they get pregnant, and stop making divorce so easy to get? I mean, you didn't have as many unplanned pregnancies OR as many abortions OR as many single moms in 1960!

So... is the solution to just make it harder to walk away from the person you're having sex with?

[Credendovidis]

Are you people kidding?

It seems so... Sex education at many - if not most - schools is in validity similar to the Roman Catholic Church telling believers that you should have sex only after you are married : totally unrealistic.

At least schools should educate the pupils from the most recent and possible realistic views, though of course include clear moral and ethical considerations in their lessons just as well.

:)

[bubbletea123]

The sex education I've received from my middle school and high school actually all focused a lot on birth control, and we didn't really talk about abstinence. Like, the teachers told us what it was but we focused so much on different forms of birth control.

I remember in grade 9 (3 years ago) everyone had to write detailed reports on almost every form of birth control like the male/female condom, the pill, the IUD, Depo-Provera, the patch, the one that looked like matchsticks in the arm (hmm I actually forgot the name), permanent methods etc. We had to know all the side effects and pros and cons of each type. We also wrote essays on topics such as "Even though Depo-Provera is the most effective form of birth control, why isn't it used as widely?" We were definitely informed about safe sex. We did the condom on the cucumber thing as well. The teacher also showed us TONS of videos on STD's that really disgusted everyone, like penises with fungus and warts. The birth videos of a baby coming out of a real vagina was scary as well. There were also a lot of projects involving case scenarios of teens approached with problems involving sex and we had to write long paragraphs on how he/she should solve the issue along with the consequences.

That sex ed probably did somewhat help because I've never encountered a pregnant teen in any of my schools or know any. I don't think the media has affected people in my school much since here in Canada almost all shows we see on T.V. are American and many of us do think they're cooler than us! Anyway, a lot of people in my school joke about sex all the time but it's actually a really big deal when someone actually has been involved in something sexual. Like I know a lot of people would be like "O_O She's touched a penis?! Wow I can never look at her the same way again!!" I don't know, I mean maybe people keep quiet about having sex but I know it is definitely not something they are proud of. Most guys I know are turned off by girls who aren't virgins.

As you can see on my other posts, I am against teen sex all the way. I've never had sex but I've actually had nightmares of being pregnant two times and it was so horrible. I can't imagine how it would be like if it was in real life. I am a teen myself (well for two more years) and I can't imagine myself being a mother in any way, even during the next few years when I'm in university. I'm really glad that my boyfriend of 4+ years and I haven't been involved in anything like that, and we want to keep it that way until we're out of university. Well, maybe a bit earlier since I'll be like 30 by then.

I'm surely not an expert but from what I've experienced, enforcing abstinence too much doesn't seem like a good idea. My health teachers always say things like "We can't stop them, so if they're gonna do it anyways, it's better if they do it and remain STDless and babyless."