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    Clough's Avatar
    Clough Posts: 26,677, Reputation: 1649
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    #1

    Feb 24, 2008, 01:14 AM
    Sunday Morning Humor #1
    Casey asked her Sunday school teacher a question: "If the people of Israel are Israelites, and the people of Canann are Canannites, are the people of Paris called Parasites?

    ****

    A Sunday school teacher was telling her class the story of the Good Samaritan, in which a man was beaten, robbed and left for dead.

    She described the situation in vivid detail so her students would catch the drama. Then she asked the class, "If you saw a person lying on the roadside all wounded and bleeding, what would you do?"

    A thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence, "I think I'd throw up!"

    ****

    One Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Alex was staring up at the large plaque that hung in the foyer of the church. The plaque was covered with names, and small American flags were mounted on either side of it.

    The seven-year old had been staring at the plaque for some time, so the pastor walked up, stood beside the boy, and said quietly, "Good morning Alex."

    "Good morning pastor," replied the young man, still focused on the plaque.

    "Pastor McGhee, what is this?" Alex asked.

    "Well, son, it's a memorial to all the young men and women who died in the service."

    Soberly, they stood together, staring at the large plaque. Little Alex's voice was barely audible when he asked, "Which service, the 8:30 or the 11:00?"

    ****

    An exasperated mother, whose son was always getting into mischief, finally asked him, "How do you expect to get into Heaven?"

    The boy thought it over and said, "Well, I'll just run in and out and in and out and keep slamming the door until St. Peter says, 'For Heaven's sake, Jimmy, come in or stay out!'"

    ****

    Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith stopped to gently reprove the child. Smiling sweetly, the Sunday School teacher said, "Bobby, when I was a child, I was told that if I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that."

    Bobby looked up and replied, "Well, Ms. Smith, you can't say you weren't warned."

    ****

    A little girl became restless as the preacher's sermon dragged on and on. Finally, she leaned over to her mother and whispered, "Mommy, if we give him the money now, will he let us go?"

    ****

    A boy was watching his father, a pastor, write a sermon. "How do you know what to say?" he asked.

    "Why, God tells me."

    "Oh, then why do you keep crossing things out?"

    ****
    friend4u178's Avatar
    friend4u178 Posts: 3,349, Reputation: 1584
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    #2

    Feb 24, 2008, 04:28 PM
    Lol , nice one Clough , Love the one about Ms Smith :-)
    albear's Avatar
    albear Posts: 1,594, Reputation: 222
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    #3

    Feb 24, 2008, 05:11 PM
    Lmao
    Clough's Avatar
    Clough Posts: 26,677, Reputation: 1649
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    #4

    Feb 24, 2008, 07:30 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by friend4u178
    Lol , nice one Clough , Love the one about Ms Smith :-)
    Smart kid, concerning Ms. Smith! LOL! :p
    Scottish2008's Avatar
    Scottish2008 Posts: 501, Reputation: 32
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    #5

    Feb 26, 2008, 06:32 AM
    Lmao. Nice. Please keep them coming.
    Clough's Avatar
    Clough Posts: 26,677, Reputation: 1649
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    #6

    Feb 26, 2008, 04:42 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Scottish2008
    lmao. Nice. Please keep them comming.
    Thank you! I will! :)
    shygrneyzs's Avatar
    shygrneyzs Posts: 5,017, Reputation: 936
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    #7

    Feb 26, 2008, 06:57 PM
    Great jokes. Which service? Lol.
    the1unv's Avatar
    the1unv Posts: 285, Reputation: 31
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    #8

    Mar 22, 2008, 04:07 PM
    LOL those are funny

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