[Chery]

I thought this was such a jewel and just had to share it with my cyberfamily!

SMILE OF THE WEEK
(contributions for this section are most welcome)

=: The Help Desk :=

This has got to be one of the funniest I've heard of in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired.

This is a true story from the Word Perfect Help line which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say, the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for "Termination without Cause".

This is the actual dialogue of a former Word Perfect Customer Support employee (now I know why they record these conversations):

Employee: "Rich Hall, Computer Assistance; may I help you?"

Customer: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."

Employee: "What sort of trouble?"

Customer: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden, the words went away."

Employee: "Went away?"

Customer: "They disappeared."

Employee: "Hmmm So wh at does your screen look like now?"

Customer: "Nothing."

Employee: "Nothing?"

Customer: "It's a blank; it won't accept anything when I type."

Employee: "Are you still in Word Perfect, or did you get out?"

Customer: "How do I tell?"

Employee: "Can you see the 'C:' prompt on the Screen?"

Customer: "What is a sea prompt?"

Employee: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"

Customer: "There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't accept anything I type."

Employee: "Does your monitor have a power indicator?"

Customer: "What's a monitor?"

Employee: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does It have a little light that tells you when it's on?"

Customer: "I don't know"

Employee: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"

Customer: "Yes, I think so."

Employe e: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged Into the wall."

Customer: "Yes, it Is."

Employee: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there

Were Two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"

Customer: "No."

Employee: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."

Customer: "Okay, here it is."

Employee: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."

Customer: "I can't reach."

Employee: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"

Customer: "No."

Employee: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"

Customer: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle, it's because it's dark."

Employee: "Dark?"

Customer: "Yes -- the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."

Employee: "Well, turn on the office light then."

Customer: "I can't."

Employee: "No? Why not?"

Customer: "Because there's a power failure."

Employee : "A power... a power failure?... Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and the packing stuff your computer came in?"

Customer: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."

Employee : "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from".

Customer: "Really? Is it that bad?"

Employee: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."

Customer: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"

Employee: "Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer.

[author unknown]

[xphelper]

A paid support person has no escape from the inept. Very, very funny!

[Da Bigchamp]

LMAO, that's funny. But the customer had it coming though.

[Bellagrace19]

I do believe that he set himself up for that swift kick in the butt...

[albear]

Hehehehehehehehhehehehehehehehehehe, would anybody have been able to hold themselves back after all that, I know I wouldn't, lol

[friend4u178]

LMAO... poor guy

[templelane]

I think the employee was actually very restrained.

Oh dear haven't laughed that hard in ages.

[Scottish2008]

I think scotgem would like this one. It was really funny. Nice to see joke that make the day go by. Lol

[Chery]

Scottish..

I thought about him when I posted it and hoped he'd look, but I guess he's not much into the humor department.

Maybe we should post it in Computers or send the link in a PM to him. I hope he does catch it. He's a fine person - almost an old friend here to me.

[spitvenom]

I used to work in tech support and I had a customer who would NOT listen to what I was telling him finally I got so mad I said "Sir the problem lays between your Keyboard and your chair!" Fortunately for me my boss didn't care and I didn't get fired.

[Chery]

I used to work in tech support and I had a customer who would NOT listen to what i was telling him finally I got so mad I said "Sir the problem lays between your Keyboard and your chair!" Fortunately for me my boss didn't care and I didn't get fired.

Good for You!

I used to manage two servers myself with an entire military hospital and outlying clinics on it for a unix based program for which I also had to load the old Kermit program on all the PCs. I would give classes on how to use the program, but right after the class I would get several phonecalls for help. I would threaten them with lashes with a wet noodle.. I guess it depends on not what you say, but how you say it - it was great fun.

[happy711]

I actually laughed out loud for this joke.

[Duecey93]

That is very funny, it is so funny it seems like he was pranking the help desk lady.

[Scottish2008]

Scottish..

I thought about him when I posted it and hoped he'd look, but I guess he's not much into the humor department.

Maybe we should post it in Computers or send the link in a PM to him. I hope he does catch it. He's a fine person - almost an old friend here to me.

You should to see what his response you will get. Nice thought. Haha

[Curlyben]

Sorry: Urban Legends Reference Pages: Too Stupid to Own a Computer :(:(

Shame we can't say things like that to people when we're doing tech support.

[Chery]

Sorry: Urban Legends Reference Pages: Too Stupid to Own a Computer :(:(

Shame we can't say things like that to people when we're doing tech support.

Dear Ben, I don't know what you should be sorry for... I found this on a memership site newsletter as a Smile of The Week Joke.. so I guess things do get passed around a lot, especially when considered good and worth passing on.

All of the Smile of the Week jokes I forward to the humor section are not from me personally, so I an honestly not a copy-cat, just a passer-on.

How is the new Mom doing?

Love, Cher

P.S. You're doing a great job here!

[love is abby]

Why would they fire him? That's ridiculous! LMAO, that brightened my day.

[friend4u178]

All of the Smile of the Week jokes I forward to the humor section are not from me personally, so I an honestly not a copy-cat, just a passer-on.


P.S. You're doing a great job here!

Chery
I'm sure the majority of the jokes here are things we all pass on , and yes Ben does a fantastic job.

Keep the jokes coming I say!! What would the days be like without a few laughs :-)

[Stringer]

Chery, I thought I was reading about myself, haha, but not "quite" that bad. Although I am leaving "heel marks" being drug into this computer age... but getting there...

Stringer