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    amanda16mom's Avatar
    amanda16mom Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Feb 7, 2008, 01:29 AM
    2 very important questions
    OK this is a 2 part question... PART 1: my fiancée enjoys anal sex EXTREMELY, we've tried a few times but it doesn't seem to get any better for me. I let him go as long as I can make myself but I would like some tips on relaxing alil more cause we've tried everything we could possibly think of and we even resorted to online tips. I would like to find a way to make this easier on me and allow him to go alil longer possibly eventually for me to even enjoy it... PART 2: we've tried using lubes but the only brand is KY (liguid not gel) and it dries up quick and if it gets inside my vangina it burns and I'm instantly turned of and in pain, does anyone think its just the liquid or is it the brand? Any tips are greatly appreciated for both questions.
    Spiker2008's Avatar
    Spiker2008 Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
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    #2

    Feb 7, 2008, 02:05 AM
    Ohh this is an easy one. Dated a girl in Austin, TX for 2 years, and had her try anal sex while dating her... nothing was much relaxing and as easy as using... ANAL EASE. This lubrican't is by far the best for anal sex. You'll be sliding around and enjoying it just as much as he does... I can guarantee you, or your BOYFRIEND will pay you your money back!
    chelse10906's Avatar
    chelse10906 Posts: 17, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Feb 7, 2008, 02:56 PM
    Frankly I don't enjoy anal sex that much easier, one being it hurts for me, and its just not arousing. To be honest I find it rather repulsive. I'm not sure exactly what lubricant to tell you to use, but I think you should just keep trying different ones. And the reason it may hurt when it gets in your vagina, you might have a yesast infection. When I tried lube, it just irritated me more. But don't automatically think you have one because I said so, try different lubes, if it still hurts or doesn't work you might want to get swabbed for a yeast infection
    twinkiedooter's Avatar
    twinkiedooter Posts: 12,172, Reputation: 1054
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    #4

    Feb 7, 2008, 07:02 PM
    If you keep putting his penis in both places you are going to get a dandy nasty infection or worse if you don't watch what you are doing and use proper hygiene for starters. Try using the KY gel as it does not dry up quickly.
    amanda16mom's Avatar
    amanda16mom Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Feb 7, 2008, 08:47 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by twinkiedooter
    If you keep putting his penis in both places you are going to get a dandy nasty infection or worse if you don't watch what you are doing and use proper hygeine for starters. Try using the KY gel as it does not dry up quickly.
    We think that the ky brand is wh\at makes me burn so were trying to stay away from that and was wondering about other brands or stlyes... and yes we know about proper hygene... were as cautious as possible always keeping it as clean as possible as well... thanx every body for the advise andhelp

    KEEP IT Coming
    rpg219's Avatar
    rpg219 Posts: 504, Reputation: 81
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    #6

    Feb 7, 2008, 08:57 PM
    Ummmm... I don't recommend the anal thing if regular sex turns you off. If lubricant is the only problem, try this... it is all natural http://www.joyfullubrications.com/

    This place was recommended to me years ago... not bad prices and easy on the sensitive areas :)
    vtram7's Avatar
    vtram7 Posts: 27, Reputation: 3
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    #7

    Feb 8, 2008, 12:14 AM
    Not just hygene... remember the first part of her comment about going back and forth... it won't matter how good your hygene is, you can't go back to front or you will have one nasty infection as stated above... good luck!
    bEaUtIfUlbRuNeTtE's Avatar
    bEaUtIfUlbRuNeTtE Posts: 1,051, Reputation: 112
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    #8

    Mar 13, 2008, 10:28 AM
    Do not purchase any lubricant that is 'water based' for that is what dries you up.
    Josaine's Avatar
    Josaine Posts: 6, Reputation: -2
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    #9

    Mar 15, 2008, 01:58 AM
    Anal sex is unhealthy sex but most men enjoy doing it because of tightness, but for women it hurts to death like you're having a constipation because our anus won't stretch, no women will enjoy doing it, women just pretending that they like it to please their boyfriend. No sensation in there because there is not clitoris in there.

    Women who are practicing anal are very prone to UTI or Urinary track Infection and if not treated it can cause kidney problem or other STD. Maybe there's other better way than anal sex, try to find out. Like contracting your vaginal muscle while having sex so your boyfriend can feel the tightness..
    MrChevvy57's Avatar
    MrChevvy57 Posts: 9, Reputation: 2
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    #10

    Mar 15, 2008, 02:26 AM
    Anal sex mmmmmmmmm.
    Try using petroleum jelly or something similar. If you can't relax during anal sex and your partner keeps pestering you.
    Go to your local adult fun shop and buy a strapon dildo and ask him to try it for himself. I reckon he wouldn't be able to relax either and if he does get rid of that freak and find yourself a man who loves normal sex with women.
    the1unv's Avatar
    the1unv Posts: 285, Reputation: 31
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    #11

    Mar 15, 2008, 04:27 AM
    The truth of it is there are many women who DO like anal sex. I am not sure of the exact number here but the anal area has around 100x more nerve endings than the vaginal area. Some women experience major orgasms this way. Anal Ease is works for a lot of people because it is like "Anbesol toothache gel". Anal Ease acctually numbs the anal area so you don't feel as much. I personally would go to an adult shop and purchase one of these two products WET or GLIDE. Both are good and will not dry up. Be prepared to spend 15-20 dollars for a 2oz. Bottle. A little goes a long ways and it will make things much easier. Now that being said, remember this: If you truly are not "OK" with doing this there is no lube in the world that will help, Also once you go to the butt-finish in the butt. DO NOT go from butt to vagina with out washing his penis with soap and water!!
    Good luck and Enjoy !
    Mike
    Synnen's Avatar
    Synnen Posts: 7,927, Reputation: 2443
    Expert
     
    #12

    Mar 15, 2008, 04:46 AM
    Looking at your other posts--you have OTHER issues in this relationship than just anal sex.

    That being said--do NOT have anal just to please him. It's a bad habit to get into.

    If you can't relax enough to enjoy it, several things may be going on.

    1. He's not warming you up enough. You don't just do regular foreplay, lube up, and pop the penis in the anus. That will never work. He needs to ease you into it, with fingers and possibly anal plugs or other sex toys.

    2. He goes to fast once he DOES get the penis in there (if he actually does #1 already). You can't just shove it in, even with lube, and say "oooh---does THAT feel good?". Not hardly.

    With the burning sensation from the K-Y: Have you even talked to your doctor? Seriously, something burning MY vagina would warrant a doctor's visit.

    But personally, my biggest advice to you is to figure out what's going on with the OTHER problems in your relationship before you worry about anal sex--and I'd tell you boyfriend that too.
    Josaine's Avatar
    Josaine Posts: 6, Reputation: -2
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    #13

    Mar 15, 2008, 05:54 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by MrChevvy57
    Anal sex mmmmmmmmm.
    Try using petroleum jelly or something similar. If you can't relax during anal sex and your partner keeps pestering you.
    Go to your local adult fun shop and buy a strapon dildo and ask him to try it for himself. I reckon he wouldn't be able to relax either and if he does get rid of that freak and find yourself a man who loves normal sex with women.

    I like your answer darling!! Those men who do anal sex besides they know that their partner not enjoying it because it hurts them are the most selfish men on earth! But it says that some women out there enjoy it..? Good luck for your anus, I hope you won't get hemorrhoid.. :D
    By the way, petroleum jelly is not good, it produces heat while doing sex, she may burn her anu and the other party...
    Josaine's Avatar
    Josaine Posts: 6, Reputation: -2
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    #14

    Mar 15, 2008, 06:00 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Synnen
    Looking at your other posts--you have OTHER issues in this relationship than just anal sex.

    That being said--do NOT have anal just to please him. It's a bad habit to get into.

    If you can't relax enough to enjoy it, several things may be going on.

    1. He's not warming you up enough. You don't just do regular foreplay, lube up, and pop the penis in the anus. That will never work. He needs to ease you into it, with fingers and possibly anal plugs or other sex toys.

    2. He goes to fast once he DOES get the penis in there (if he actually does #1 already). You can't just shove it in, even with lube, and say "oooh---does THAT feel good?". Not hardly.

    with the burning sensation from the K-Y: Have you even talked to your doctor? Seriously, something burning MY vagina would warrant a doctor's visit.

    But personally, my biggest advice to you is to figure out what's going on with the OTHER problems in your relationship before you worry about anal sex--and I'd tell you boyfriend that too.
    So Synnen.. you do like anal huh, good to hear that, I didn't know there are some women enjoy anal sex. Thanks for letting me know that. Be careful though, you may get a hemorrhoid... it is very painful, believe me!!
    Choux's Avatar
    Choux Posts: 3,047, Reputation: 376
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    #15

    Mar 15, 2008, 12:31 PM
    Dear Amanda.

    So sex for you right now is pretty much pain and misery. I'm really sorry to hear that. Sex for women is capable of being anything from pure animal sexual orgasms to unbelievable bliss. Sex is pleasure. :)

    I'm worried that you are going to pursue the pain and suffering type of sex because you want to please your boyfriend... you *must* go to a good therapist and discuss your relationship and sexual life in detail. You deserve a good *pleasurable* sex life.
    Josaine's Avatar
    Josaine Posts: 6, Reputation: -2
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    #16

    Mar 15, 2008, 05:09 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Josaine
    Anal sex is unhealthy sex but most men enjoy doing it because of tightness, but for women it hurts to death like you're having a constipation because our anus wont stretch, no women will enjoy doing it, women jsut pretending that they like it to please their boyfriend. No sensation in there because there is not clitoris in there.

    Women who are practicing anal are very prone to UTI or Urinary track Infection and if not treated it can cause kidney problem or other STD. Maybe there's other better way than anal sex, try to find out. Like contracting your vaginal muscle while having sex so your boyfriend can feel the tightness..



    Yeah right anal sex won't cause kidney problem but it can cause urinary track infection that "may" cause kidney problem if it won't be treated right away or the recurrent UTI is not good, if that bacteria can enter to your kidney it may cause it 'may' cause, but I know it is not the major cause of kidney problem:p . Anyway, just avoid doing back and fort (from vagina to anus to vagina) just finish it there...
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,492, Reputation: 2853
    Uber Member
     
    #17

    Mar 18, 2008, 12:40 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Josaine
    Yeah right anal sex wont cause kidney problem but it can cause urinary track infection that "may" cause kidney problem if it wont be treated right away or the recurrent UTI is not good, if that bacteria can enter to ur kidney it may cause it 'may' cause, but i know it is not the major cause of kidney problem:p . Anyway, just avoid doing back and fort (from vagina to anus to vagina) just finish it there...
    Definitely once its in the butt it stays in the butt. But in 17 years my wife has not had one single UTI... nor have I. And yes being married for a long time in a faithful marriage I do go bareback all the time.

    She loves it, and even asks for it... You just have to go easy and slow at first then after a few minutes you can step up the pace after you relax.

    It all in HOW you do it...
    giani513's Avatar
    giani513 Posts: 179, Reputation: 47
    Junior Member
     
    #18

    Mar 18, 2008, 09:52 PM
    AstroGlide
    lella87's Avatar
    lella87 Posts: 21, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #19

    Mar 19, 2008, 03:30 PM
    Darling for anal sex you NEED an oil based lubricant. For normal sex you need a water based lubricant. And I hope to dear god that you aren't swapping from one hole to the other without changing lubes and condoms..

    Bottom line... if after all this it STILL Hurts... tell him to take a hike and forget it :) he should understand.. and if it doesn't... show him justt how much it can hurt :)
    Foxyarse's Avatar
    Foxyarse Posts: 41, Reputation: 4
    Junior Member
     
    #20

    Mar 19, 2008, 03:37 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by amanda16mom
    ok this is a 2 part question.....PART 1: my fiancee enjoys anal sex EXTREMELY, weve tried a few times but it jus doesnt seem to get any better for me. i let him go as long as i can make myself but i would like some tips on relaxing alil more cause we've tried everything we could possibly think of and we even resorted to online tips. i would jus like to find a way to make this easier on me and allow him to go alil longer possibly eventually for me to even enjoy it............PART 2: weve tried using lubes but the only brand is KY (liguid not gel) and it dries up quick and if it gets inside my vangina it burns and im instantly turned of and in pain, does anyone think its just the liquid or is it the brand? any tips are greatly appreciated for both questions.
    God almighty... do not engage in this sort of behaviour... You can get HIV from doing it

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