[Kymom]

My five year old daughter father and I were never married. When my daughter was six months old, I lost the house I was renting, I lost my job, I lost pretty much everything. I asked my child's father to help me out by taking her a little while so I could get back on my feet. He lived about ten miles down the road. I still saw my daughter often and when I got my apartment I started taking her part of the week.

The father told me he wanted to get papers signed so that I couldn't just decide to take her out of his life. He got a lawyer to draw up JOINT custody papers and told me to go to the lawyers office and sign them, I did, I was young and very naïve. I thought joint custody meant actual joint shared custody, I didn't understand what primary custodial parent meant and the father told me they had to put that in there but it didn't really mean anything( I know, I was dumb) anyway we each take her half the week, he has her a little bit over half, so I didn't even realize how badly I got screwed until later.

I eventually got married, my husband and I own a home, I am a stay at home mother of three children and a foster son. The problem is a couple of years ago the father started sticking our daughter in daycare all day long, at one point he was unemployed for months and still put her in daycare all day, on the days that he had her. When I asked him to let me take her during that time he said NO, that that was his time. He constantly talked about the fact that he was primary custodial parent and that made him the boss. I just wanted to know if there are any laws that address me not having a lawyer present during the signing of the custody agreement. I mean the judge did not decide he was the best parent. His lawyer got me to sign the paper and then turned it into the court to get signed. I feel very taken advantage of, and I feel that our daughter has to suffer because he wants to play power games with me. CAN ANYONE HELP ME?
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[N0help4u]

You could go back to court and ask to revise the custody papers because he isn't using his time as time with him anyway. Tell the Judge he is denying allowing you to watch her and taking her to daycare instead simply because he doesn't wanting you to have her and you feel it would be in the best interest of the child to be with you during the times the father can not watch her. You might be able to get the Judge to revise them and it is worth the try I would think.

[Fr_Chuck]

So several years ago you did a certain agreement, don't worry about why and no lawyer and so on, things change and you merely go back and ask for a change in the agreement.

The custody agreement should say what days you get the child and what days he does.

[m.sanders2010]

I am going through the same thing except it hasn't been years only about a month, before the child's father decided to stop allowing me to see my daughter. But I am taking him back to court and hopefully the judge will have mercy on me and understand that I had no clue as to what I was signing.