Redirection needed
I'm old-school, I do not believe in a sassy child, a child must know his/her place. She has seen this behavior and has adopted it as her own, especially if it yields the results she desire. Negative actions are to be ignored, otherwise, the child will learn that negative attention is better than no attention and pursue the behavior as a means of attainment. Spanking a child only teaches them to hit, especially when angry, frustrated. Therefore, it is is essential to redirect her leadership skills into a more positive atmosphere. She needs to be sternly corrected, to know that the behavior displayed is not appropriate, and will not be tolerated. She is a bright young lady in need of discipline, care and correction. Because she is a leader... help her to develop these skills, she needs an outlet, age appropriate of course. Invest time in your daughter, teach her etiquette, the need to ask for whatever is needed and not to demand, explain to her, why it is essential. Advise her that she needs to be a woman revered and respected. She will understand---teach her how to balance her behavior. As far as Miss Clingy... understand her separation anxiety... she has experienced loss to the degree that she has internalized it; help her to understand the importance of growth in relationships... that not all relationships will last forever, that relationships have purpose... some endure longer than other... however, life is built on these types of relationships. Like going to the grocery store, the bond with the cashier is brief but essential, get her involved in an activity that allows the creative side in her to flourish; whereby the concentration of her attention will center around achieving, whereby teaching her the glory of gain, so that she spends less time brooding over loss
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