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    Vero1986's Avatar
    Vero1986 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Nov 21, 2005, 09:28 PM
    I'm in Love with a Married man.. Help!
    I am 19 yeas old and I am in love with a married man.. He is 20 and he has been with his wife for almost 5 year but had been married for 1 year.. He don’t live with his wife, she lives in Panama and he lives here in Canada.. He was going to go back to Panama this year but now he don't want to go back.. He says that he don't want to get me go... We have known each other for a long time now and Oh one more thing, he is also my dads friend.. I have liked him for a long time now and he has liked me too. I feel really bad for her but I still want to be with him and I know that I am doing bad but I can't help it.. He tells me that he likes me also and that he cares about me very much and that he may tell his wife that he don’t want to be with her no more… We’ve have sex before but he likes to call it ( making love ) and I know is wrong but I can't help it… Is he for real or just want to have fun with me for now?

    I have stop seeing him and I have stop talking to him and I have just stop being with him lets see what happenes?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #2

    Nov 21, 2005, 10:04 PM
    The same old song!
    Is he for real or just want to have fun with me for now?
    You answered your own question.Stop having sex with him and see how long he hangs around.For your own protection if his lips move stick your fingers in your ears, :eek: Rule#1married men will tell women anything to get some.I do mean anything.(I've only got 10 miutes to live and I don't want to die a virgin! Help me mama.)Dont feed the dog and he'll find a bone somewhere else/. :rolleyes: :confused: :p PLEASE STOP FALLING FOR THE OLDEST GAME IN THE BOOK.! now look what you did you got me beggin'good luck! :cool:
    fredg's Avatar
    fredg Posts: 4,926, Reputation: 674
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    #3

    Nov 22, 2005, 05:43 AM
    Married men
    Hi,
    Being in love with a married man (if you are not his wife) is common. Over half the marriages in the US end in divorce. One of the reasons is just like your question; falling in love with married men.
    At 19 yrs old (I am 63, married 28 yrs), are you sure about this? At 19, I thought I was sure about almost everything, but later, found out I didn't know much about anything. My first marriage lasted 7 yrs, ended in divorce.
    Give yourself some time. If you are having sex with this married man, then put a stop to it, so you can have some time, and him, too.
    Give it a couple of months, without seeing him. In that way, both of you will find out if it's really "love", or just infatuation with each other, for the sake of sex.
    Another thing you might consider is that; This man is married, but "fooling around" with another woman. Do you think he will do the same to you, if you marry him?
    Please give yourself a chance to find out what you really want. Don't see him, or talk with him for a couple of months. Then, both of you will know if this is "real" or not.
    NeedKarma's Avatar
    NeedKarma Posts: 10,635, Reputation: 1706
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    #4

    Nov 22, 2005, 05:48 AM
    So he's been with the same girl since he was 15? I'm guessing that's the only girl he's ever been with and now he's getting curious. His marriage will fail and you will be transition girl. Just sit back, date other guys and watch this train wreck happen but don't get involved in the middle of it. Lots of guys out there - go for one that is stable and all yours.
    nymphetamine's Avatar
    nymphetamine Posts: 900, Reputation: 109
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    #5

    Nov 24, 2005, 11:04 AM
    This Is Why People Get Hurt.
    This Is Why People Get Their Little Feelings Hurt In The First Place. If You Fall For This Mans Tricks You Will Regret It For The Rest Of Your Life. You Are His Little Toy To Play With. If You Do Decide Well Im Going To Do The 19 Year Old Thing And Not Listen To People Who Have Been Around Longer Than Youhave And Have Been There And Done That Then And You Still Want To Marry Him. Don't Sleep With Him Anymore Or Have A Thing To Do With Him Until You See Divorce Papers. A lot Of These Men Who Do This Usually Wrk Things Out With Their Wife And They Get Back Together So I Wouldn't Spend Any Time With Him So When He Does You Won't Feel Like A Dummy. I Can Picture You Married To Him Right Now And The Picture Im Getting Says If I Could I Would Come Through This Screen And Hold You Around Your Ankles To Keep You From Going With Him.
    Anayden's Avatar
    Anayden Posts: 67, Reputation: 19
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    #6

    Apr 27, 2007, 01:29 AM
    Im tired of all these dam women saying they with married men. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH You?? I can't believe that after you knew he was married you stayed. That says very little about your personality. Obviously you have NO self esteem if you know that he is and you STILL are with him. The anger when you found out should have been enough energy to leave him. You are just stupid 4 staying with him. Why would he leave his wife if he got her cooking and taking care of his home and getting free sex from you when ever he want to on the side? Please girl. You are just going to get yo heart broken. I hope when you marry the same thing happens to you. But I hope you find out. Maybe then it would give you and idea of how his wife would feel if she had proof. I HOPE SHE WHOOPS YO AZZ! THEN AND ONLY THEN WILL YOU KNOW THE PAIN THAT US MARRIED WOMEN FEEL WHEN FLOOZIES LIKE YOU WITH NO SELF ESTEEM COME INTO THE PICTURE. IF YOU Don't KNOW ITS PASSABLE BUT IF YOU KNOW YOU ARE A SLUT!
    tobeamiss's Avatar
    tobeamiss Posts: 65, Reputation: 17
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    #7

    Jul 28, 2007, 10:25 AM
    Why don't you whores just go and find your own man!? I hope you get hurt just as much as I was when I found out my husband was having an affair. I hope whoever you fall in love with and laugh with and dream with breaks your heart in half some day and makes you feel like you just want to die. Of course I could say a lot worse but I'm keeping it clean. You're just his cheap trick until he gets back home to Panama to his wife who will hopefully never know nothing about you.
    MrsHec4's Avatar
    MrsHec4 Posts: 118, Reputation: 4
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    #8

    Jul 28, 2007, 10:44 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by tobeamiss
    why don't you whores just go and find your own man !?! I hope you get hurt just as much as I was when I found out my husband was having an affair. I hope whoever you fall in love with and laugh with and dream with breaks your heart in half some day and makes you feel like you just want to die. Ofcourse I could say alot worse but I'm keeping it clean. You're just his cheap trick until he gets back home to Panama to his wife who will hopefully never know nothing about you.
    I totally agree my husband and I are going through a similar situation right now because some woman thought it was okay to fall in love with him knowing he was married. She's not the only one to blame but I suggest that you really consider leaving him alone. If he truly wants to be with you and not his wife allow him to deal with his wife (divorce her) before you "make love" to him again.
    HaQueen's Avatar
    HaQueen Posts: 14, Reputation: 3
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    #9

    Aug 3, 2007, 08:19 AM
    I understand what your going through. I'm 22 years old and just graduated college. I started working with this guy (who is married of course) and I thought he was so attractive. It was hard for me to focus on my job. He flirted a lot with me, even telling me that he wanted to take me on his motorcycle on day. This just started really (about a week ago) and I noticed I was beginning to fall for his game. I actually believed he liked me. Truth is, he just wants to know that he still has it. I think married men just want to see how far they can get an innocent girl (the younger the better) to fall for them. And when they do, he loses attraction for her and moves on to the next girl. It's a never ending cycle.

    You shouldn't feel special because of the things he says to you, I learned that a man who cares little about his own wife's feelings definetely doesn't care about me! Don't give in, be strong, as I am trying to be in my situation. Good luck!
    andy2659's Avatar
    andy2659 Posts: 17, Reputation: -2
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    #10

    Aug 13, 2007, 08:14 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by tobeamiss
    why don't you whores just go and find your own man !?! I hope you get hurt just as much as I was when I found out my husband was having an affair. I hope whoever you fall in love with and laugh with and dream with breaks your heart in half some day and makes you feel like you just want to die. Ofcourse I could say alot worse but I'm keeping it clean. You're just his cheap trick until he gets back home to Panama to his wife who will hopefully never know nothing about you.
    Gee, I can't imagine why your husband would cheat on you.:)
    tariq666's Avatar
    tariq666 Posts: 2, Reputation: 0
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    #11

    Aug 13, 2007, 11:59 PM
    I think he is the one who will run away from you (leave u) because he got what he is looking for “sex” .
    :rolleyes:
    tobeamiss's Avatar
    tobeamiss Posts: 65, Reputation: 17
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    #12

    Aug 15, 2007, 11:43 AM
    Appearances can be deceiving. Actually I'm a very nice person. I just don't like being betrayed. And I certainly have no pity for single girls who seek married men. They can say it was an accident, but they know what they're getting themselves in to and in the meantime, they destroy families. And yes, I do wish ill on cheap tricks.
    julia-marie's Avatar
    julia-marie Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #13

    Jan 17, 2008, 03:32 PM
    [QUOTE=Anayden]Im tired of all these dam women saying they with married men. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH You?? I can't believe that after you knew he was married you stayed. That says very little about your personality. Obviously you have NO self esteem if you know that he is and you STILL are with him. The anger when you found out should have been enough energy to leave him. You are just stupid 4 staying with him. Why would he leave his wife if he got her cooking and taking care of his home and getting free sex from you when ever he want to on the side? Please girl. You are just going to get yo heart broken. I hope when you marry the same thing happens to you. But I hope you find out. Maybe then it would give you and idea of how his wife would feel if she had proof. I HOPE SHE WHOOPS YO AZZ! THEN AND ONLY THEN WILL YOU KNOW THE PAIN THAT US MARRIED WOMEN FEEL WHEN FLOOZIES LIKE YOU WITH NO SELF ESTEEM COME INTO THE PICTURE. IF YOU Don't KNOW ITS PASSABLE BUT IF YOU KNOW YOU ARE A SLUT![/Q
    julia-marie's Avatar
    julia-marie Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #14

    Jan 17, 2008, 03:35 PM
    Ouch! That was a bit harsh I must say! Men are born predators, some women are vulnerable! To call the poor girl a tart is not on!! Why don't men get called? I have been on the receiving end and all I can say is "it's his loss"!!
    mishelly3's Avatar
    mishelly3 Posts: 300, Reputation: 16
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    #15

    Oct 12, 2008, 12:42 AM

    What are you doing? Why are you doing this to yourself?nyour 19 move on. Listen to what all of these people are saying this won't work. He cheated on his wife babe your next in line. Get out of this relationship and then get some counceling so maybe the next relationship u have can be a healthy one...


    Good luck
    JBeaucaire's Avatar
    JBeaucaire Posts: 5,426, Reputation: 997
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    #16

    Oct 12, 2008, 01:35 AM

    Hehe, I love seeing adamant responses to questions three years old...
    Everyone Smile's Avatar
    Everyone Smile Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #17

    Nov 15, 2008, 10:54 PM
    I think it’s a little funny how you are taking the fall for this affair. It seems as though the man is ‘expected’ to stray and you are a whore for tempting him. Listen, each individual has his/her own morals and conscience to answer to. Unless you are related to or are a close friend of the wife, then you owe her no duty. It is her husband who is cheating on her, not you. A man who wants cheats on his wife (be it because he is unhappy in the marriage or just wants a little on the side) is going to cheat on his wife regardless. With that being said, don’t let this guy play you or break your heart. He should have, out of respect for his wife, told her that he was unhappy before he began an affair. He doesn’t appear to be a person of good character. Keep in mind that his wife isn’t someone that he just met on the street; he exchanged vows with this woman. I understand that maybe they got married too young, but if he holds such little regard for her, do you really think that he will offer you any respect? Good luck with this situation. I’m sure it can’t be easy.
    JBeaucaire's Avatar
    JBeaucaire Posts: 5,426, Reputation: 997
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    #18

    Nov 16, 2008, 01:26 AM

    Yeah, it was a tough situation... three years ago...
    ANUSHKA86's Avatar
    ANUSHKA86 Posts: 3, Reputation: -3
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    #19

    Nov 16, 2008, 09:19 AM
    Don't say "lets see what happenes"...
    If u don't love him or care about him then why are you bothring to discuss this issue.
    If u had any feelings for him don't let him go
    If your love is true then you shuould hold him tightly in your life.
    If he is ready to forsake his family for you why don't u care for him.
    After u'll stop loving him he'll nvr come back to you, so don't waste your time
    I was also in love with a married man but I nvr stepped out of his life & one day he left his pregnant wife for me because I nvr pushed him back I alwys pulled him towards me
    xoxaprilwine's Avatar
    xoxaprilwine Posts: 582, Reputation: 71
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    #20

    Nov 16, 2008, 02:49 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Everyone Smile View Post
    I think it’s a little funny how you are taking the fall for this affair. It seems as though the man is ‘expected’ to stray and you are a whore for tempting him. Listen, each individual has his/her own morals and conscience to answer to. Unless you are related to or are a close friend of the wife, then you owe her no duty. It is her husband who is cheating on her, not you. A man who wants cheats on his wife (be it because he is unhappy in the marriage or just wants a little on the side) is going to cheat on his wife regardless. With that being said, don’t let this guy play you or break your heart. He should have, out of respect for his wife, told her that he was unhappy before he began an affair. He doesn’t appear to be a person of good character. Keep in mind that his wife isn’t someone that he just met on the street; he exchanged vows with this woman. I understand that maybe they got married too young, but if he holds such little regard for her, do you really think that he will offer you any respect? Good luck with this situation. I’m sure it can’t be easy.
    I agree with the above post and think it is the best answer for you. I think you're a convenient fix and side-dish. In other words he can have when his wife is in Panama, and you in Canada. If she moves here do you think he will continue the relationship? You are 19... sooo young and why put yourself in the predicament your in? You feel bad and you know its wrong so do what your heart tells you to do. He is going to Panama to be with his wife and that right there tells you where his heart is. He can and will say anything to try and make you feel better just to take the edge off but actions speak louder then words. Leave and find a new crush there are plenty of eligible men out there.

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