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    mareex17's Avatar
    mareex17 Posts: 9, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Nov 9, 2007, 01:13 PM
    i hate how fat i am and it leads me to do bad stuff.
    I'm a 17 year old female and have issues about my weight.im 5'8 and a GROSS 145 lbs (im going to be 115 one day=]) it started over two years ago when I started to diet because my parents would criticize me about my weight (ive probably tried over 20 different kinds since then) and I try to control everything I eat.im constantly thinking about how fat I am and how gross food is. When I first started dieting I used to starve myself,throw up and take laxatives. After I did that stuff and lost a good amount of weight I gained it back and it's a constant battle too loose it again. I usually try to starve myeslf because it makes me feel good but it ends up not working out in the end. I know a lot of what I do is bad but I love the feeling of how thin I feel after and the control it takes. I don't know what else to do . I just want to be skinny and in control of my life and its becoming really time consuming what should I do? I used to work out by my parents made me stop because they said I did it too much.
    jolienoire's Avatar
    jolienoire Posts: 917, Reputation: 166
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    #2

    Nov 9, 2007, 01:18 PM
    Hun, your putting way too much pressure on yourself Your (BMI Body mass Index) is 22 your average for your height and weight, If you go down to 115 you would be underweight, that is not healthy. Have you tried working out? Perhaps toning your body? You do not need to loose weight. Have you tried going to conseling to talk to someone? This is a very serious issue. You should not be starving yourself, and taking extreme measures to loose weight as you can be doing major damage to your organs. I would suggest you talk to someone about this this is important
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #3

    Nov 9, 2007, 01:19 PM
    At 5'8" 115 would be very unhealthy for you.

    Do you mind if I ask you a few questions before I go into depth answering your question?
    mareex17's Avatar
    mareex17 Posts: 9, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Nov 9, 2007, 01:23 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by J_9
    At 5'8" 115 would be very unhealthy for you.

    Do you mind if I ask you a few questions before I go into depth answering your question?
    What kind of questions?
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    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #5

    Nov 9, 2007, 01:25 PM
    Simple really...

    You are 17

    Are you still in school?

    Are you a straight A or B student?

    Are you a good kid?

    I know the questions sound strange, but they are important.
    mareex17's Avatar
    mareex17 Posts: 9, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Nov 9, 2007, 01:27 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by J_9
    Simple really...

    You are 17

    Are you still in school?

    Are you a straight A or B student?

    Are you a good kid?

    I know the questions sound strange, but they are important.


    Yes I'm still in school
    Yes I hate always getting As and Bs because then my parents get disappointed if I don't.
    And my parents think I'm a good kid I kind of am but I like to have fun
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    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #7

    Nov 9, 2007, 01:32 PM
    Do you consider yourself a perfectionist?
    mareex17's Avatar
    mareex17 Posts: 9, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Nov 9, 2007, 01:35 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by J_9
    Do you consider yourself a perfectionist?

    At times yes but it depends on what its hard to explain.
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    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #9

    Nov 9, 2007, 01:37 PM
    Okay, thank you for answering my questions, but I have a few more, okay?

    Have you ever been told, or felt, that you have anorexia?

    Have you ever been told, or felt, that you are bulemic?
    mareex17's Avatar
    mareex17 Posts: 9, Reputation: 1
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    #10

    Nov 9, 2007, 01:40 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by J_9
    Okay, thank you for answering my questions, but I have a few more, okay?

    Have you ever been told, or felt, that you have anorexia?

    Have you ever been told, or felt, that you are bulemic?

    Yess I have been told that but I don't care because I know that I'm not. Plus they would be skinny.
    confused4's Avatar
    confused4 Posts: 15, Reputation: 1
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    #11

    Nov 9, 2007, 01:42 PM
    OK, my sister allie is 18. Ever since she was 13 she's had an eating disorder. Staving herself, throwing up, ext. And now 3 rehabs and 8 more years of conceling later, she's still not close to being better. Its been so hard on the hole family. I think that maybe you should slow down and not be so hard on yourself. 145 is NOT BAD! Expically for a 5'8, 17 year old. I think you should just try to eat healthy and work-out every once in a while. But DO NOT starve, or throw-up. Its so bad 4 your body. Please just consider my advise.

    -confused4
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    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #12

    Nov 9, 2007, 01:49 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by mareex17
    yess i have been told that but i dont care because i know that i m not. plus they would be skinny.
    Hun, anorexics are skinny, bulemics are average weight and some are even overweight.

    At your weight and height, you are actually perfect. If you feel otherwise it may be time for some counseling.
    La-La-Lola's Avatar
    La-La-Lola Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #13

    Nov 9, 2007, 02:15 PM
    Listen hun , we've got way much in common.
    I'm 17 , I'm 5"9 and I weigh about 145
    For a very long time I felt the same way you do right now. I believed I was grossly overweight and that I needed to do anything I could to lose the weight. I was like thatfor three years. But then I started talking to the people I was close to and realized that the only who thought I was fat was me!!
    That was two months ago and I still talk to those people when I feel that I need a little support and reminding of how beautiful I really am and I've never felt better about myself.
    But if you really want to lose weight a healthy way then just eat right and exercise normally. Over doing it will just land you in the hospital. And starving yourself may cause temporary weight loss but when it comes back it will bing a couple of extra punds with
    If you really need someone to talk to
    e-mail me at EMAIL REMOVED FOR PRIVACY

    Good Luck Hun!!
    peggyhill's Avatar
    peggyhill Posts: 907, Reputation: 150
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    #14

    Nov 9, 2007, 02:18 PM
    First of all, like J_9 and others have said, you are normal for your age and height. 115 would be very underweight for you. Second, if you have starved yourself or made yourself throw up, you DO have an eating disorder. Even if you aren't doing those things right now, you are still way too focused on your weight. Binging and purging, starving yourself, and "yo-yo" dieting are VERY damaging to your body. As important as your weight is to you right now, you need to stop and think that you could be doing Permanent damage to yourself. You need to talk to your family doctor about this. Be honest with him/her about everything you have done in the past as far as dieting too. He/she can not only refer you to a good counselor who specializes in eating disorders, but can also make sure that you haven't damaged your body so far. You need to see a doctor before you do any kind of exercise or dieting. Sometimes, you can have something wrong with you and still feel OK. I think considering all the stress you have put your body through you need a physical, and whatever other treatment the doctor thinks that you should get. Once you have made sure your body is healthy, then you can start working on your mental health. Tell your folks you need to see a counselor. Even if you have tried it in the past and it didn't help, try it again. Find a counselor that you like and feel comfortable with. You could also talk to the school nurse for information on eating disorders, healthy weight, and counseling. I'm sure she/he would be glad to help out. It's a hard battle to stop obsessing over physical appearance. But, it's a battle that you CAN win. There is help out there. Also, take a look at these websites that might help:
    Eating Disorders
    The World's Most Comprehensive Eating Disorder Referral and Information Service Specializing in Anorexia, Bulimia and Binge Eating Disorder, eating disorders, binge eating, bulimia, anorexia
    Mental Help Net - Eating Disorders
    I hope this helps. Remember that you are a unique beautiful person. Focus on being healthy in all areas of your life, not on your weight. Good luck and let me know if you ever need some support! :)
    katieperez's Avatar
    katieperez Posts: 236, Reputation: 35
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    #15

    Nov 9, 2007, 03:10 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by J_9
    At 5'8" 115 would be very unhealthy for you
    Ok you, I'm going to butt my big nose into this one because these responses have got me sctatchin me noggin :confused: So I'm 23, 24 on Dec 1st, just a few hairs shy of 5'10", and I weigh around 118lbs. Of course I fluctuate, who doesn't, but I've never been over 120lbs. I'm naturally very slender, as is my mom. Up until 2 or so years ago we wore the same size :eek: Anyhoo, I'm not at all unhealthy, other than anxiety issues. As a matter of fact, I'm very healthy and strong as I've been back and forth with an Army recruiter (don't ask :rolleyes: ) and turns out I'm of ideal standards. So, question is, what's the deal? Why is 115lbs SO unhealthy for her? Is it because she's still young? Of course her ideas of weight loss are outrageously unhealthy, but if she did it right, why would 115lbs be so bad? I've attached a couple of pics so you can see that I don't resemble skeletor or anything. Help??
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    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #16

    Nov 9, 2007, 03:18 PM
    Yes, it is mainly because of her age. At that age she needs all she can get to be healthy. I am currently 43, 5'2" and 122, doc told me I need to gain weight to support my heart and lung health.

    When we think of weight we thing of how fat or how thin we are. We don't consider that all of our other organs depend on our weight to carry out normal daily functions.

    Katie, just viewing your pics shows me that you are healthy but still underweight due to your height.
    amy8807's Avatar
    amy8807 Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #17

    Nov 9, 2007, 08:51 PM
    Wow girl you have problems your weight is a good weight at your age... and why do you want to be so skinny anyway... what the big deal I personally think it's gross I like curves and girls are supposed to have curves and let me tell you guys like girls with curves rather than skin a bones...
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #18

    Nov 9, 2007, 09:22 PM
    115 is skinny for your height. Set your goal to be size 7 or 9 and don't worry about what the scale says.
    katieperez's Avatar
    katieperez Posts: 236, Reputation: 35
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    #19

    Nov 10, 2007, 08:28 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by amy8807
    wow girl you have problems your weight is a good weight at your age...and why do you want to be so skinny anyways... what the big deal i personally think it's gross i like curves and girls are supposed to have curves and let me tell you guys like girls with curves rather than skin a bones....
    Wow. That was bold. I don't remember mentioning that I had a problem with my weight. I'm not trying to lose or gain weight. I'm perfectly comfortable in my skin and with the way I look. I feel good. I eat right for the most part (aah junk food :) ) and the only exercise I get is walking my pups and frolicking at Ft. Woof with them. Which is enough for me. Your statement was not only bold but kind of mean. At least you're just an internet stranger that thinks I'm gross, and not someone I know, because that would hurt to be told I'm gross by someone I care about. And let me tell you, the only guy I care about what he thinks of me, my husband, likes me just the way I am. Boney a$$ and all.

    NOhelp4u- I know I'm skinny, but I don't aim to be. I've just always been. I don't have a goal. I'm usually in a size 4 and sometimes 6 because I am so tall. And I don't ever worry what the scale says, I worry about how I feel. But I do appreciate you not being mean to me like the above poster :D

    J_9- Thanks for the enlightenment :) I never took into consideration the health of all the other organs. Now that you mention it, my mom is 48 and started gaining weight 2 or so years ago. She now struggles with cholesterol through the roof and has a very weak heart. She did have rheumatic fever as a kid though. Think her being so skinny all her life played a part in her current health? Or is that just father time catching up with her? Her and I are like clones, she graciously passed her anxiety disorder down to me. Thanks again, now I've got something new to ponder :)
    s_cianci's Avatar
    s_cianci Posts: 5,472, Reputation: 760
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    #20

    Nov 10, 2007, 08:46 AM
    My friend, in a perfect world every girl would look like Barbie and every guy would look like Ken. But guess what ; we don't live in a perfect world! Yes, you're a little overweight. So am I (if you call 5-10 and 220 lbs. a "little" overweight lol!) But that's life and your parents and everyone else you come into contact with have got to learn to deal with it. Your parents are obviously overbearing perfectionists (as were mine when I was growing up) and I don't even mean that disrespectfully, but Mom and Dad also need to have the intelligence and maturity to realize that life isn't perfect and yes, in this world a number of people are somewhat "overweight". My only response to that is "So what?" Live your life the way that's right for you. If you truly feel that you want to lose some weight then stick with your exercising and stick to a sensible diet. I don't know if I have too much faith in the various "fad" diets out there but just stick to simple principles like limiting fats and sweets and eating mainly fruits and vegetables. Drink mostly fruit juices and water and limit soda and other sugary beverages. Don't starve or purge yourself as neither of those are healthy and are in fact a lot more harmful physically than carrying around a few extra pounds. Don't pressure yourself to be perfect, in any aspect of your life. That's not realistic for you to impose on yourself and it's not fair for others to impose it on you.

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