[lovegrumpybear]

Im engaged to this great guy. We have a little girl together. He also has a little boy with another girl and he's not sure if its his. She won't let him bring his son around me and our daughter until he gets a paternity test done with his daughter. The only problem is that we know that he is the father. All he wants to know is what he has to do to go about giving up the rights to his son. I've never pushed him to meet his son. She never thought about doing child support until she found out that we are getting married. He wants to give up the rights but he's not for sure if he'll have to pay the child support once he does.

[wackymb]

No, I don't think he will have to pay child support if he gives up all rights and has nothing to do with them. Not sure though, you can call a lawyer and ask them or call the child support people. But, if the boy is his, why would he want to give up all rights? Does the child even now him? Just wondering. That would be hard on the kid. Best of luck with the ex.

[Synnen]

Um... you're wrong.

Unless the mother has someone ready to adopt the child, he'll be paying child support whether he gives up his rights.

Parental rights and parental obligations are two different things.

All giving up rights does is make it so that you have no say in how your child support money is spent.

[jasondbel]

Try this one, son's mother was a crackhead. The father tried to do everything he could to keep her off crack but she went behind his back. The baby was born healthy so far. She breastfed but still indulged in coke. She breastfed until he quit taking the nipple at 6 months then split and left the son with the father. Shows back up a month later and demands the kid. She was a stripper. The father was a hard worker. Loved his son did everything he could to see him after she took him . The stripper wanted more money so now the father wasn't good enough so she left with his son and moved in with a drugdealer. The father picks the son up after a few days brings him back but he hits his mom and clings to daddys neck the mom strips him from daddy and demands more money or she is disappearing. The drug dealer kicks her out after using her so now she is bouncing around with a baby boy. The father is hurting big time for his first born son and she is dragging him from place to place as a meal ticket. She will call daddy and put his son on the phone the son says dadda love dadda the mom says say goodbye you will never see him again. The father drops to one knee and tears roll down his cheek. The father gave her all his paycheck every week just to see his son for 2 days. The mother left the son when he quit taking the nipple then showed back up a month later after drugs demanded him back. The father calls the police the police give him to his mother. The father within that month lost his job and was evicted from his place. He couldn't save up money because as long as he gave her his paycheck she let him take him for the weekend. What are you supposed to do. She is still getting high and stripping but disappeared the father is still trying to come back from the losses.

[macksmom]

Have to spread the rep Synnen ;)

But Synnen's right...
The mother has to have someone willing to adopt the child in his place.
A father cannot just give up his rights. It's not that simple, thankfully.

If he wants to see his son he needs to go to court and get a visitation order set... then the mother can have no say as far as him bringing his son around you and your child. (given that you are not a danger to the child).
Bottomline, if he is looking to get out of paying child support and that's why he is wanting to give up his rights... it's not going to work.

[jasondbel]

What about the scenerio above? What should the father do in that case? Pay child support to a stripper on crack blackmaling the father. Is that a give up custody situation?

[Synnen]

what about the scenerio above? What should the father do in that case? Pay child support to a stripper on crack blackmaling the father. Is that a give up custody situation?

You need to please ask your own question, rather than piggybacking on someone else's question.

It's a completely different situation, and deserves to have its own answers and discussion.

[jasondbel]

I guess I don't know how to use this site too well yet but I believe my intentions were to answer wackymb when she asks "why would a father want to give up rights?" I merely expressed a scenerio where the father is dying inside and the only way to survive was to relinquish all rights.

[jasondbel]

Its called a rhetorical question. Hence the underlying meaning.