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Homegirl 50 · Sep 8, 2007, 05:56 PM

You know, you can either afford it or you can't. If you can't, bow out of it. She will either understand or she won't. And if she doesn't, then you have just learned something about her that you probably needed to know.

GlindaofOz · Sep 8, 2007, 05:58 PM

That's very true. Thank you.

nauticalstar420 · Sep 8, 2007, 05:59 PM

It is possible, but would there be a reason why? Have you been fighting lately or anything like that (other than over this issue)?

Like Wondergirl said, she could just be becoming a Bridezilla. I hope not for your sake, because they look like they are extremely difficult to deal with.

Be honest with her. If you already have, do it again. Tell her that you are starting your business and thinking of your future, and this is an expense you just cannot afford. She will either understand, or she won't. If she doesn't understand, then I feel it is her loss. When it comes to spending money you cannot afford to spend, you really have to think of yourself as well as the bride.

Homegirl 50 · Sep 8, 2007, 06:00 PM

I hope she understands and your friendship stays in tact. If it doesn't, you are probably better off in the long run.
I wish you the best.

GlindaofOz · Sep 8, 2007, 06:04 PM

Our friendship has been fine. She lives in NY and I lived there as well up until about 5 months ago and things between us have been okay. She is sort of flaky with calling and emailing but that's just her. I just never thought that something like a wedding could cause this much drama between the two of us.

Homegirl 50 · Sep 8, 2007, 06:19 PM

Weddings can make some women act a plain fool.

nicespringgirl · Sep 9, 2007, 02:15 PM

Isn't that bride paying for all in America? Why you are asked to pay for it Glinda?
I might be wrong, but I thought Bride pays for everything.

nauticalstar420 · Sep 9, 2007, 02:16 PM

Originally Posted by nicespringgirl

Isn't that bride paying for all in America? Why you are asked to pay for it Glinda?
I might be wrong, but I thought Bride pays for everything.

Most of the time the members of the wedding party are responsible for paying for their own things such as dress, hair, nails, etc. If a bride pays for it, that is a very nice bride. :p

nicespringgirl · Sep 9, 2007, 02:20 PM

Originally Posted by nauticalstar420

Most of the time the members of the wedding party are responsible for paying for their own things such as dress, hair, nails, etc. If a bride pays for it, that is a very nice bride. :p

In Japan, it's the man's responsibility to PAY FOR EVERYTHING. What a culture difference here!:p

nauticalstar420 · Sep 9, 2007, 02:21 PM

Originally Posted by nicespringgirl

In Japan, it's the man's responsibility to PAY FOR EVERYTHING. What a culture difference here!:p

Yes most definitely. :p

GlindaofOz · Sep 9, 2007, 02:21 PM

Wouldn't that be nice then this would not even be a problem!

As an update she never called last night and did not answer when I called her nor has she returned my message. So now I have no clue what she is thinking

nauticalstar420 · Sep 9, 2007, 02:22 PM

Originally Posted by GlindaofOz

Wouldn't that be nice then this would not even be a problem!

As an update she never called last night and did not answer when I called her nor has she returned my message. So now I have no clue what she is thinking

I hope everything goes well. Have you decided what you were going to do when she does decide to return your messages?

nicespringgirl · Sep 9, 2007, 02:25 PM

How much the new dress going to cost for you Glinda?

GlindaofOz · Sep 9, 2007, 02:25 PM

I'm going to tell her flat out that I simply cannot afford the dress and that if she wants me to be a part of the wedding party then she needs to pick a different dress or go back to what we initially agreed upon. If she refuses I will tell her that I will have to step down as Maid of Honor since I cannot honor what she wants at the wedding. I'm going to tell her that I hope that this doesn't damage our friendship but if she feels slighted there is nothing I can do about it.

GlindaofOz · Sep 9, 2007, 02:27 PM

Originally Posted by nicespringgirl

How much the new dress gonna cost for you Glinda?

Originally she just told me to get a dress in a wine/chambord color that was cocktail length and I could get it anywhere. Which meant that I could find something at a discount store for probably $50 - totally affordable.

The new dress is about $500 not including alterations, shoes, accessories, etc

nauticalstar420 · Sep 9, 2007, 02:27 PM

Good job. It sounds like you are going to do what is best for you, and that is the most important. :)

nauticalstar420 · Sep 9, 2007, 02:28 PM

Originally Posted by GlindaofOz

Originally she just told me to get a dress in a wine/chambord color that was cocktail length and I could get it anywhere. Which meant that I could find something at a discount store for probably $50 - totally affordable.

The new dress is about $500 not including alterations, shoes, accessories, etc

:eek:

Holy cow, I didn't know it was going to cost that much. I wouldn't pay for it either.

nicespringgirl · Sep 9, 2007, 02:31 PM

$500? Even millionares have to think about it before buying it!

You have to be frankly that you can't afford it. I hope she understands it, if not... she is quite selfish then...

GlindaofOz · Sep 9, 2007, 02:34 PM

Yeah its crazy. It just amazes me because we both used to complain about how blind brides get once they start doing all the wedding stuff. We used to really make fun of some of our girlfriends who would turn into total nutjobs its just sad that she become one of those nutjobs.

Homegirl 50 · Sep 9, 2007, 05:17 PM

The dress is $500.00? That is insane.
See the way wealthy people do it, the bride pays for all of that stuff. MOH only does the shower.
I would not ask someone to pay that kind of money for a dress that will only be worn once, especially if I have friends for whom I know it would be a struggle. That is just inconsiderate.