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    reallyconfused26's Avatar
    reallyconfused26 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Aug 30, 2007, 04:06 PM
    All of the sudden she wants time off
    I'm new here.. I hope you all can give me some helpful advice because I'm really confused right now.

    So here's my story

    First off, I'm 26 and she is 24

    I've been dating my girlfriend for 3 months. Everything has been absolutely perfect between us, sure we had a few arguments but we communicate well and are able to work through our differences. Our relationship progressed really quickly. We took a trip to Hawaii together and had decided to move in together. She had pretty much been living with me already and had stayed with me every night for the last month. Last week after we got back from vacation she wanted to go pick out some new furniture, so we went out and bought a new couch together. Everything was going great until Saturday, she came home from work and said she was going to stay at her apartment this week so she can get everything ready to move in. she's a teacher and she also started back to school on Monday. This seemed reasonable to me so I didn't say anything. We hung out Saturday night and Sunday afternoon.. again everything seemed pretty normal. She seemed a little distant, but I just assumed it was because of all the stress of going back to work. I called her Monday after I got off work to see how her first day went and I asked her if everything was cool with us. She said she was "reflecting". She explained that she wanted to take some time off to make sure she didn't rush into this relationship. She said she still wanted to talk to me and didn't want to break up. I asked her what we were going to do about her moving in and she said she was afraid we would move in together and we might be at each others throats in a few months. She wants to make sure we're not rushing things. I agreed to give her some time and we got off the phone. I know was serious about moving in because she had some of the bills moved over into her name and had changed her address on her other bills. Now.. she is a very smart and rational person and I know that what she is doing is probably the best thing for her and for us. I'm just not sure what to do. I want her to know I'm thinking about her and I'm missing her, but I don't want to call. I sent her flowers, which I think may be a mistake but I'm not sure. What do you think I should do? This is eating me up inside... any thoughts?
    parafenix's Avatar
    parafenix Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #2

    Aug 30, 2007, 04:36 PM
    OK, so you've been dating for 3 months.. that's not a particularly long time for a girl to process moving in with a guy. And you shouldn't get offended by that.. really, moving in is a BIG step! She probably just needs some time to think about it, because once you move in, then the next step is usually greater commitments such as marriage... she knows you love her. And it's not a mistake that you sent her flowers, if anything it should cheer her up. Just be supportive, and give her room, and if she decides not to move in now.. take it slow. Or else you might drive her away forever.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #3

    Aug 31, 2007, 09:56 PM
    You two are moving to fast, and thank goodness she is trying to slow things down. You should take a page from her book, my friend and slow this train down. Your strangers to each other, and need a lot more get to know each other time. Follow her lead.
    x2scorp's Avatar
    x2scorp Posts: 29, Reputation: 3
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    #4

    Sep 1, 2007, 07:03 PM
    Yes indeed slow down, plese give her plenty of space. She doesn't love you any different but I thinkk she got caught up in "The love la-la's" She was thinking abouthow things will be in the future and she rushed it.. Be calm.. Be stronge. Everything will work out.

    Chin up,
    Mel:cool:

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