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sugar327 · Aug 23, 2007, 07:48 AM

Hi, I am a 27 year old f hanging out with a 17 year old m. the problem is... I'm confused about the age of consent in PA and what would happen to me? We have not had sex yet, we just hang out, but I love this guy and when we hang out age doesn't seem to matter at all! Everyone that hangs out with us thinks that it's no big deal, however his mom is going crazy and making false accusations about me! She assumes that I am some kind of bad person and that I'm a drug addict and that I love to drink. When the truth is I'm completely against drugs and I have a glass of wine every now and then. She has never met me or anything. He ran away one day and she called the cops and told him that he was at my house! Which he was not! I just feel like I'm being harassed for no reason! I just know that I Love him and I can't live without him in my life! What are the laws in PA for this? I just don't want to go to jail for hanging out with someone, but I really want to be intimate with him also. What should I do?:confused:

Thank you for your help!

MrsJoseph06 · Aug 23, 2007, 07:50 AM

I'm not positive but 18 is usually the age of cosent. With a Mom like that she can accuse you of having sex with her son with out any proof and you can be prosecuted. I would be really careful! When will he be 18?

J_9 · Aug 23, 2007, 07:51 AM

The age of consent in PA is 16, so no you are not doing anything illegal. However, I do have to side with his mother as a parent of teens myself. I feel that he is too young in his life to have a relationship with someone that much older.

I remember being 18 myself and dating a 28 year old. My parents were dead set against it. Now that I am older, I see why and am thankful my parents ended that relationship.

Emland · Aug 23, 2007, 07:52 AM

If a 27 year old woman was hot for my son (who turns 17 this Dec) I would wonder what in the world is wrong with her that she has to go after a child.

The age difference means little between a 30 and 40 year old, but the life experience is overwhelming between 17 and 27.

Can you not relate to your own age group?

Glass of whine? I'm not even going to touch that one.

JohnSnownw · Aug 23, 2007, 07:54 AM

Age of consent is 16 in PA. Here's a link:

Age of Consensual Sex in the USA

However, your age difference is rather large, and that is something you may want to think about before pursing a proper relationship.

MrsJoseph06 · Aug 23, 2007, 07:58 AM

Moral Outrage - Pennsylvania - Age of Consent Laws

Here is a link to the cosent laws!
I think it totally depends on the 17 year old how mature he is and how you handle the situation my husband and I started to date when I was 15 and he was 22. Everyone had a fit! My parents were really hard on us and I really don't blame them! They have a right to be worried about there kid. But we made it through 3 years of frustration and stress and got married on our 3 year anniversary when I was 18. I love him and I don't see the age diffrence as an issue but it just depends on the person.

ScottGem · Aug 23, 2007, 08:00 AM

Originally Posted by sugar327

hi, I am a 27 year old f hanging out with a 17 year old m. the problem is... I'm confused about the age of consent in PA and what would happen to me? we have not had sex yet, we just hang out, but I love this guy and when we hang out age doesn't seem to matter at all! Everyone that hangs out with us thinks that it's no big deal, however his mom is going crazy and making false accusations about me! she assumes that I am some kind of bad person and that I'm a drug addict and that I love to drink. when the truth is i'm completely against drugs and I have a glass of whine every now and then. she has never met me or anything. He ran away one day and she called the cops and told him that he was at my house!! which he was not! I just feel like I'm being harassed for no reason! I just know that I Love him and I can't live without him in my life! What are the laws in PA for this? I just don't want to go to jail for hanging out with someone, but I really want to be intimate with him also. what should I do?:confused:

thank you for your help!!

You did enough whining in this post. Now I'm going to give you my advice, but you probably won't like it. You need to get counseling. You are a sick lady. For a 27 yr old to be so obsessed with a 17 yr old is NOT normal. Whether its legal or not, is not the issue, its immoral. What's more, I suspect this 17 yr old's ONLY interest in you is getting into your pants. He knows you are obsessed with him and wants to take advantage. Once you have relations with him he will probably dump you.

As to you being harassed, there is GOOD reason for it. You are contributing to the delinquency of a minor. So RUN do not walk to a therapists who can help you understand why you are obsessed with someone so much younger!

sugar327 · Aug 23, 2007, 08:04 AM

I just moved to where I live now. I made friends my age too, but I've always hung out with younger people, and all my life I've always dated guys younger than me. If you would be able to see me... I actually look like I'm 19 or 20. This is the first time the age gap has been 10 years. I have guys my age interested in me, however this one just seemed to click with me. Actually... he came after me anyway! I remember when I was 17... I was an adult and had a full-time job and was also in college, had my own place and made my own decisions. This 17 year old guy is mature for his age and even looks older himself. I know that when he turns 21 and I'm 31 then everyone will come up to us and say, "wow what a cute couple". I've even met people that are 7 years difference that are still married and they said that when they were young people had a problem with it, but they loved each other so it didn't matter. I guess it seems like I'm playing with fire right now, but when he turns 18... (which is next year) then we won't have a problem with the law... right??

ScottGem · Aug 23, 2007, 08:06 AM

Get counseling girl, you need it.

sugar327 · Aug 23, 2007, 08:18 AM

Ohhh thanks Scott Gem... maybe I will... but what about the 17 year old? Do you think he needs counseling too? Maybe we should both go because we like each other? You have been so helpful, no wonder you would like people to call you for your advice for .75 a min... wow.. I bet people call you all the time for your awesome advice. Thanks So much!!

ScottGem · Aug 23, 2007, 08:24 AM

Originally Posted by sugar327

ohhh thanks Spot Gem.... maybe I will.... but what about the 17 year old? Do you think he needs counseling too? Maybe we should both go because we like each other? you have been so helpful, no wonder you would like people to call you for your advice for .75 a min... wow.. i bet people call you all the time for your awesome advice. Thanks So much!!!!!!!!!!

Nyah, I don't think the 17 yr old needs counseling, he seems normal, what 17 yr old wouldn't want a 27 yr old panting after him? If the sexes were reversed then maybe yes, but not as they are.

Oh and I take calls relating to computer questions where I am a professional. I don't accept calls for a fee where I'm not a professional.

sugar327 · Aug 23, 2007, 08:50 AM

Hey Scott Gem-- have you tried counseling? I'm glad you pretend that you know me OR the 17 year old... it's so great. I feel so close to you now. Thank you for all your help. Now I realize that I have a problem that can only be solved by you. Thank you again for helping me with my sickness. I bet you love your life!

ScottGem · Aug 23, 2007, 08:58 AM

Actually I do love my life. I have a great wife and daughter, and very good job and a hobby helping people by sharing my knowledge and experience.

I don't have to go lusting after 17 yr old boys to get my kicks. And I never said your problem (and you do have one) could be solved only by me. I specifcally suggested you seek a competent therapist.

Capuchin · Aug 23, 2007, 09:00 AM

Hi Sugar, resorting to sarcasm rather than having an adult conversation? Maybe you are actually 17 on the inside. What happened to your life?

GlindaofOz · Aug 23, 2007, 09:06 AM

Originally Posted by sugar327

Hey Scott Gem-- have you tried counseling? I'm glad you pretend that you know me OR the 17 year old.... it's so great. I feel so close to you now. Thank you for all your help. Now I realize that I have a problem that can only be solved by you. Thank you again for helping me with my sickness. I bet you love your life!

I see why you date younger men. You maturity level seems to be around 15.

I'm 28 and I would never think of 17 year old in a sexual manner. In my opinion you must have some sort of arrested development going on. I don't know a single one of my friends who would hang out with 17 year olds let alone date them. Did you have a rough adolescence? Are you scared of growing up and becoming an adult? What do your friends who are your age think of this?

I'm not trying to knock I'm interested in what is driving you into this relationship.

sugar327 · Aug 23, 2007, 09:24 AM

Oh it's very simple. I met this guy who me and all my friends thought was at least 20 years old... hung out with him and his friends... then he tells me he has a crush on me... I realize that I really do like him a lot... then he tells me his real age and the way I feel about age is it's just a number and that's all... I mean... my dad is 50 and Looks and acts like he is 35, same with my mother... Why would I "grow up"? You only get to live one life... why not enjoy life? Also-- my friends think it's awesome because they all like him and they think we are perfect for each other. Also-- as I have mentioned before-- all my life I have never dated a guy my age or older. Always younger. It's just the way it has been... Just like my one friend who will only date older men. I know that I'm not the only girl in the world who is older than the guy she likes... keep in mind also: he came after me! Thanks for your comments.

Capuchin · Aug 23, 2007, 09:27 AM

Of course he came after you, you're a conquest. Think of all the high fives he must be getting from his mates.

ScottGem · Aug 23, 2007, 09:34 AM

Originally Posted by sugar327

I just know that I Love him and I can't live without him in my life! ... but I really want to be intimate with him also. what should I do?:confused:

Whether he came after you initially or not, the above quote is pretty clear.

Originally Posted by sugar327

Why would i "grow up"? You only get to live one life.... why not enjoy life?? ... Also-- as I have mentioned before-- all my life I have never dated a guy my age or older.

Why would you grow up? Because at 27 its time. Growing up doesn't mean not enjoying life. That's a very immature thing to say.

And that history you refer to is one of the reasons for my comments. You need to understand why you have always gravitated towards younger guys.

sugar327 · Aug 23, 2007, 10:02 AM

Scott Gem... maybe you are in the wrong profession... maybe you should be a high school guidance counselor? It seems that you would have more fun doing that rather than computers. Oh and I don't care what you say about me growing up... I don't even know you... so there is no reason for me to even care about your opinions of me. You haven't even answered the question I asked originally... Is it illegal for me to hang out with a 17 year old? He already told me he would wait a year to be intimate with me... so once again.. you were wrong about him. He does not only want to get in my pants. Try again.

GlindaofOz · Aug 23, 2007, 10:16 AM

There is nothing illegal about hanging out with him. But ANY sexual contact can send you to jail. While the age of consent is 16 most states have a provisions that only allows for 3-4 years difference (i.e. a 16 year old dating a 19 year old okay... 21 year old there would be an issue). So right now since he is not 18 any sexual contact can put you in jail.