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    jillianleab's Avatar
    jillianleab Posts: 1,194, Reputation: 279
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    #1

    Aug 14, 2007, 07:10 PM
    Doggie Dominance Issues
    I'm asking this question for a friend of mine (really!).

    My friend and her soon-to-be husband have been living together for about 10 months now, and my friend has a dog (mutt; border collie mix) who is about three years old. Before the hubby to be moved in, it was just my friend, the dog, and two cats. Everyone was getting along quite well up until about a month ago. For some reason the dog ignores hubby to be. He gives a command, and she ignores him (for the most part). If my friend gives her a command, the dog obeys right away. Hubby to be and the dog seem to be butting heads for some reason, but we aren't sure why. The only thing that has changed recently is my friend is pregnant. Some people have suggested the dog can "sense" this and that's the problem, but I'm not convinced.

    So we figured this must be an issue over dominance; the dog wants to dominate hubby to be, but obviously, that's not the way it should be! Does anyone have any suggestions on how this guy can go back to being a dominant figure to the dog? It's just so weird that the dog obeyed him before, but doesn't anymore. I suggested that hubby to be take the dog for walks and that HE holds the leash (not my friend, if she even goes) and gives any commands, but I have no idea if that will work. I don't want to give the impression the dog doesn't like the guy, because she does. She's thrilled when he comes home, they play together; she just refuses to listen to him! He says "here" and she looks at him like, "yeah, sure thing buddy, I'll get right on that."

    Opinions? Suggestions? Thanks!
    labman's Avatar
    labman Posts: 10,580, Reputation: 551
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    #2

    Aug 14, 2007, 08:48 PM
    That is a strange one. The pregnancy could be a factor. I have seen too many reports of changes with the pregnancy to discount the dog knowing. I would send him to Establishing and Keeping Alpha Position, Letting your dog know you are the boss
    jillianleab's Avatar
    jillianleab Posts: 1,194, Reputation: 279
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    #3

    Aug 15, 2007, 08:19 AM
    Thanks, labman! I knew you'd have some advice to give me, and the website is especially helpful. I'll be sure to pass it on to my friend.

    The only reason I don't think the pregnancy is a factor is because she is about six months along and it's only happening now. I suppose the dog might be noticing the difference in her body shape and attitudes, however. She's a pregnant lady, she gets anrgy sometimes, lol!

    Thanks again for the advice. :)
    RubyPitbull's Avatar
    RubyPitbull Posts: 3,575, Reputation: 648
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    #4

    Aug 15, 2007, 08:43 AM
    Jillian, whatever the reason this has prompted this reaction, the hubby to be does need direction on establishing or reestablishing his leadership. Is your friend the dominant force in the household? If he is an easy going kind of guy, that could very well be the issue. The dog sees your female friend as the alpha and now is challenging the fiancé for pack rank. Labman's resource is an excellent one. Another thing the fiancé should consider is enrolling himself and the dog into an adult dog training class in your area. I know you are in the D.C. area so there should be a number of very fine trainers in your area. Speak to your vet or other friends who have dogs and find out who they recommend. I think the one on one time with the dog is needed to put her back into her proper place. The more time he spends giving her direction, the more quick she will respond.
    jillianleab's Avatar
    jillianleab Posts: 1,194, Reputation: 279
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    #5

    Aug 15, 2007, 08:55 AM
    Ruby you make some great points, and training classes might be a good idea. I have hope the things on the link labman gave will help, as the dog isn't really defiant all the time, she just listens when she wants to! My friend is the dominant person in the house. She's also owned the dog on her own for three years, then suddenly, there's this guy going around giving commands without any credibility. He's also never had "house dogs" and I think he has trouble getting used to it. I agree that more one-on-one time and direction from him is important. I really hope they are able to sort it out, she's really a sweet dog!
    RubyPitbull's Avatar
    RubyPitbull Posts: 3,575, Reputation: 648
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    #6

    Aug 15, 2007, 09:01 AM
    I am sure she is very sweet and labman's link will most definitely help. But your friend needs to understand that "just listens when she wants to" is a human trait, not a doggy one. Credibility in him isn't the issue. It has to do with how he is projecting himself to the dog, the signals he is giving off, and the fact that your friend is a dominant person. If he takes direction from your friend, the dog sees it & feels the emotional response from both of them. THAT is the reason she is giving him such a hard time. She is definitely challenging his pank rank. If you feel that he doesn't need some practical hands on direction, then the link labman gave should work just fine.

    P.S. Usually between labman and I, we always manage to fill in the gaps, coming up with a well rounded response and a solution to the problem.
    jillianleab's Avatar
    jillianleab Posts: 1,194, Reputation: 279
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    #7

    Aug 15, 2007, 09:19 AM
    I see your point, ruby. You're right, if my friend tells hubby to be to do something and he obeys, the dog will see no reason to obey him. That makes a lot of sense. I honestly don't know if the tips in the link will work or not, as it will take obedience on the human end to make it work, and I'm not sure how motivated they are to "fix" this problem. That's why I say I'm not sure about hands on training in a classroom, I honestly don't know if the guy would do it. I think at this point they are looking at the dog's disobedience as an annoyance, not a serious problem. That's why I hope the things in the link will work; they take effort (but don't cost money), don't require a time commitment (going to a class twice a week from 4-6), and are really pretty easy to do. I agree that classroom training would probably be the most quick thing to nip this in the bud (it's about training him and the dog, of course), but again, I just don't know if they are motivated enough to do that. I will keep it in mind as a suggestion, though. If the tips in the link don't work they might get more motivated!
    RubyPitbull's Avatar
    RubyPitbull Posts: 3,575, Reputation: 648
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    #8

    Aug 15, 2007, 10:09 AM
    All I can say is that they need to turn around their way of thinking about the dog being an annoyance and not a serious problem. If they don't nip this in the bud by taking the time out to retrain themselves, the problems will only get worse. With a baby on the way, this is not a good situation and they need to get control of it prior to the baby being born.
    jillianleab's Avatar
    jillianleab Posts: 1,194, Reputation: 279
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    #9

    Aug 15, 2007, 10:22 AM
    Yeah, I agree, and that's what has me concerned. Introducing a baby is likely to only make things worse unless the issues are sorted out beforehand. The dog has never been aggressive before, but you just never know what a dog will do when it feels threatened in one way or another. I'll try to steer them in the right direction, I really will! :)
    jillianleab's Avatar
    jillianleab Posts: 1,194, Reputation: 279
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    #10

    Aug 15, 2007, 10:42 AM
    RubyPitbull agrees: Good on you Jillian baby! Try as hard as you can. I know how capable you are of getting your point across! LOL.
    Are you implying I'm a pushy b***h with dominance issues??

    Yeah OK, guilty! :)
    RubyPitbull's Avatar
    RubyPitbull Posts: 3,575, Reputation: 648
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    #11

    Aug 15, 2007, 10:49 AM
    PMSL. Not at all dear. I am implying that you definitely know how to get your point across when you put your mind to it! You have a way of getting others to come around to your point of view. Very good thing in my book! But, if you are happier with being known as a pushy b**** with dominance issues, well, that's okay by me. :D
    labman's Avatar
    labman Posts: 10,580, Reputation: 551
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    #12

    Aug 15, 2007, 12:37 PM
    The dog Breed info link has a link to a page on dogs and children.

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