[danielnoahsmommy]

I cannot believe you are still looking for support here. I don't think you will get what you are looking for. He was wrong and so are you and am wondering why you were not charged or will you be? Charged with child endangerment.

[excon]

But acting on it may hurt my daughter or my grandkids in the future

Hello again, B:

ACTING on it IS the key. You apparently DID that, and protected your daughter from further harm. I was commending you on that. I also said it's cool to love him - that's got nothing to do with children. That's got to do with YOU. You're an adult. So, go do that, and have a happy life.

But, no matter what you might hope for, and what you might wish for, DON'T EVER let him be alone with children again - EVER. THAT'S ACTION.

excon

[4answers]

No I don't need anyone's permission to feel something. But acting on it may hurt my daughter or my grandkids in the future in the future and I would never want to do that. I guess I was just looking for a sounding board so I could decide if it was worth the risk. I never expected it to be so one sided however. I assumed that since child molestation was so common that there would be others out there with my delimma.

There probably is, going through the courts right now. The perverts (who in my opinion should be shot and I would gladly do it) leave behind them a wake of devastation and destruction, destroyed youth, destroyed relationship etc... But of course this is the act of an unselfish, loving caring person ! OF Course it is not...

Please take off your rose coloured glasses, ignore the grooming that these perverts do on adults as well as kids and see the CREATURE for what it is.

We all like to see the good in people and forgive. But some things are Pure selfish evil desire for self gratification that will harm the other people for the rest of their lives!

This is what you think you love !

This is not just some affair in a moment of weakness. This is pure selfish uncaring self gratification at the harm and expense of another human being...

[BEEN THERE]

DO YOU PEOPLE NOT LISTEN! My children are grown. I never endangered them never had my daughter around him from the second I found about it. Why do you feel there should be court action against me. Please explain.

[shygrneyzs]

If you allow him back in your life and expose your grandchildren to him, then you would deserve to have charges brought against you. You know what he did and child molesters are not of a curable sort of people. One of my Psych professors said there are only two known cures for them - both quite illegal now.

[4answers]

You offend me ! Your attitude is sick. I am normally not a rude person, but I cannot condon your action and I will report this to the authorities.

[4answers]

To the moderators on this site please take action now, this person is clearly OK with putting children at risk. Please forward this person details to the authorities of which country she belongs. I will also report this to the Uk Authorities.

Thank you. A concerned citizen for the health and well being of children.

[danielnoahsmommy]

excon, I normally agree with 99% of what you say. But why are you willing to deal with this individual who can only think of herself, is she worth all your efforts, she wants the OK again to bring this animal back into her daughters life. I won't give it to her and I hope you don't as well

[excon]

You offend me..... I cannot condon your action and I will report this to the authorities.

Hello 4:

Relax, Dude!

There's not even the suggestion that a crime has been committed here. I get that you don't like her. But, if you snitch, for no apparent reason other than to cause her trouble, I'll be highly offended!

If you want to call the cops, find a REAL crime.

excon

[4answers]

Hello 4:

Relax, Dude!

There's not even the suggestion that a crime has been comitted here. I get, that you don't like her. But, if you snitch, for no apparent reason other than to cause her trouble, I'll be highly offended!

If you wanna call the cops, find a REAL crime.

excon

With the utmost respect to yourself, I have seen the effects of child abuse and although the op clearly did love and perhaps still has feeling for this person there is no excuse to allow this abuser anywhere needs children. The op might not be concerned about the after effect of abuse on her daughters life. That is clearly her choice and she does not see this as an issue. In other words she is putting her interest before that of a victim of child abuse. That is 100 % wrong. It is because of this attitude that abuse is so often not reported and continues.

I cannot allow this to happen both for the sake of the op daughter and other children. I have therefore requested the moderators take action as I will.

The op should not have a problem in any way manner or form that the authorities no about this. No caring person would.

I am sorry if you disagree with this course of action. But the welfare of children must come first.

Regards
4 answers.

[danielnoahsmommy]

Let lay it on the table. This is the ? We all should be asking. How could she love this sicko who has hurt her child in this way. There are many things I'd like t do to the animal and I can't believe she does not. Doeas she not love herself to have the self respect to see what she wants to do is wrong. Oh no starting to feel like there are some things I'd like to de to her. Ought to go.

[danielnoahsmommy]

There is no such thing as an ex-child molester. Once a molester always a molester

[BEEN THERE]

Are you out of your mind? Or all just illiterate. As I have said the child is grown over 18 and out of the house and We are not even dating This is a love I carry in my heart and have not acted upon at all, which is why I was seeking advise? The only wrong action I have taken was to pour my heart out to a bunch of people who would prefer to sit in judgement and start a lynch mob rather than to listen or give advise. And you call yourself Christians??

[PippaSW]

Ok, we all understand that your kids are grown. But think of it this way, do you really think that your kids would want to even sit across from him at the table at like holidays and stuff... after what he has done?
I'm guessing they wouldn't!

[GlindaofOz]

Are you out of your mind? Or all just illiterate. As I have said the child is grown over 18 and out of the house and We are not even dating This is a love I carry in my heart and have not acted upon at all, which is why I was seeking advise? The only wrong action I have taken was to pour my heart out to a bunch of people who would prefer to sit in judgement and start a lynch mob rather than to listen or give advise. And you call yourself Christians????

Who is calling themselves a Christian? Last time I checked this is non-denominational site.

I'm sorry but you are deluded if you thought announcing to a bunch of people that you are still madly in love with a man who violated children would be met with approval.

What do you want us to say? I think the problem here is that none of us can understand how you can love someone who did what your ex did. After all this time how could you still feel this way.

[danielnoahsmommy]

Apparently she thinks they do.

Furthermore, I hold a masters degree and my husband who agrees with me is a federal attorney. I am giving you what you asked for an opinion. If you don't like the opinions get of the site.

[Emland]

How could you ever look your child in the eyes again?

Since I don't consider myself a Christian, I don't have any problems with never forgiving a monster like that, either.

[LearningAsIGo]

I never expected it to be so one sided however. I assumed that since child molestation was so common that there would be others out there with my delimma.

I'm really saddened by your statement. One sided? Because what you write about is abuse and wanting to justify a later relationship with a person who hurt your daughter... and yourself. Its one sided because to us (outside of the situation) its easy to see you're heading down the wrong path if you reinitiate contact.
When you mention child molestation being so common ( :( ) Its due in part to the offenders having long standing relationships with their victims. Example: Parents who continue to have access to the children they molest, family friends who remain in their lives, etc.

DO YOU PEOPLE NOT LISTEN! My children are grown. I never endangered them never had my daughter around him from the second I found about it. Why do you feel there should be court action against me. Please explain.

As said before, you did the right thing by ending the relationship and protecting her. However, adult children or not, they are still your children and need to be protected by you. All the good you did in the past could be undone by starting a relationship with him again. (I don't get why court action should be taken... I'm not commenting on that)

If you think its one sided, that should actually tell you something. It means that within the millions of people with access to this PUBLIC Internet site, no one is considering a similar relationship. That alone should tell you that something may be wrong in acting on this.

[excon]

let lay it on the table. this is the ? we all should be asking. How could she love this sicko who has hurt her child in this way.

Hello again, mommy:

Ok, let's talk about that... Frankly, I don't think that's the question we should be asking. I do agree, however, it's for sure the question everybody IS asking.

Here's MY answer. From my perspective, I don't understand how an awful lot of people can love and support a whole variety of REALLY bad people. But they do, and you know some of them. They're your family members... That's a question that will NEVER be answered to my satisfaction. So, I just don't concern myself with it.

What I AM concerned about, like you, is the welfare of the children who might be exposed to this guy. She said that she removed her daughter when she should have, which was appropriate, and her daughter is grown up now. She has a choice whether she wants a relationship or not. That's not our call.

BEEN did say that she thinks loving this guy might put her grandkids at risk. I certainly put the kybosh on that idea, and hopefully, she got it.

But if she wants to love this perv, let her.

excon

[Homegirl 50]

This is not about being Christian, it is about common sense and discernment.
This man is a pedophile, and you think you still love him after he has molested your child. Do you not see a problem here? It does not matter that your child in now 18, she still carries scars and your associating with this monster would only re open them.
I'm curious to know how long you've had these feelings and what brought them on. Maybe you are just lonely, but you don need to revisit that mess.