[blushingbride708]

Well, I am 17 and I will be getting married on July 19 2008. I have been engaged since November but haven't told my parents. I am afraid to because they may tell me I can't see him. Since he is graduated, and my father won't let me get a license it would be very hard to sneak and see each other... however I hate hiding this... I know that they will say that I am too young but I know this is right for me. He and I are so in love and we know that we have what it takes. His mom and dad know and they support us 100%. What should I do, and if I tell them what do I say?

[GlindaofOz]

To be frank if you are grown up enough to get married you should be grown up enough to tell your parents.

The truth is if they do not allow it then it cannot happen until you are 18. Why the rush?

[shygrneyzs]

You have already established this relationship on a shaky foundation - that of concealing this from your parents. You are making adult decisions and yet not acting like an adult.
Instead of hiding this you really need to sit down with your parents and tell them the truth. The whole truth.

17 is too young to be considering marriage. You have not even graduated high school yet. Your fiancé is graduated - what is he doing with his life? Is he working and making enough money to support you and possibly a family? What about continuing his education? What are your plans for college? Or do you think that high school is enough in this day and age? It is not.

You need to give your parents the opportunity to understand what is going on. You say they will not. I can see that, especially when they find out that you have been hiding this. But you have to cross that bridge. Or do you think you are going to elope and come home married and then tell your parents?

Please consider being upfront with your parents. Tell them that you have this boyfriend and you love him and that he loves you. Tell them that he wants to marry you and you want to marry him. Your parents may surprise you and not outright forbid it, but ask that you wait at least until you are out of high school. Make them a part of what should be a happy time for you.

Good luck.

[happylady123]

You are so young, most marriages don't last when people get married at your age. Why not wait?? If you love each other so much then it should be no problem to wait a few years. How long to have been "dating" your boyfriend anyway? And what's the hurry? You need to act your age finish school, go to college then worry about getting married.

[blushingbride708]

I may be young but that doesn't mean that I do not know whether I can handle this. I have lived in a world where living on my own has happened. I have supported myself while staying in school and being successful in that. I am not naïve or dumb. I am going to pursue college and my fiancé is planning to enroll wherever I decide to go to. He has his major planned out. He isn't back in it already BECAUSE he is working his off at a damn good job paying wise which will and has supported us! Even couples who are in their thirties have troubles telling their parents that they are getting married! Yes my situation is different but that doesn't mean it is any less valuable, or has any less of a chance. I didn't ask this question so that I could be put down and degraded and LECTURED to about my age and my decision! The question wasn't whether I should get married it was how do I tell my parents. And YES I am making an adult decision and YES I am being adult right now. I may be concealing it from them but I Don't WANT TO BE which was the whole point of this so please watch your wording more carefully. NOW if anyone with a real brain and heart wants to help me I would appreciate it. I am not normally rude or mean but this is ridiculous. Just because someone is young doesn't mean that they don't know what's going on. And also there's no need to worry about supporting a family right now because we both agree to wait for that, even after we're married! And if we do have sex we have BC and condoms, and even then he can still pull out. And if after all that it still happens then it was meant to by God. Any christians going to argue god's will and plan? Now please someone, HOW do I tell my parents that I am engaged?

[Biggie]

Simple, you say "Mom, Dad, I'm engaged."

[0nelife2liv3]

Well tell them like your joken and then when you do then they just going to be like why didn't you tell me and you can be like I did but you didn't believe me. Lol
Or are you trying to go before you are 18?
Well I'm 17 and my boyfriend/babyfather is 21 and we are getting married tomorrow if we can or Friday because we are just going to the court house and doing everything and we been with each other 3 years and we have a 1 year old child I told my mom like this Mom I need you to sign a consent form saying that I can get married lol it hit her hard but I mean it was easy for me because my dad don't have a say so and your do and its only my mom so I mean no your not too young to get married don't let nobody tell you that because me and my fiancé are both christians I just recently got saved and we decided to live our lifes right and with god on your side all is possible so yea all them that was telling you that just hating because maybe they were married and it didn't work or something I don't know but pray to god consalt him first and ask if its OK because even with my fiancé he stop going to college he was playing football he wants to go back and in 4 years he is going to try out for the redskins team to become pro and me I want to be a marriage family divorce counslor so don't let nobody bring you down and when you have doubt that's the devil trying to steal your joy OK hun.
I'm glade if anything I said was helping you but if not swollow your gutt and just be like mom dad I'm 17 I have came a long way of making my own choices nobody told you 2 that you didn't know if you was for each other and I feel like I'm ready to handle the responsibility of taking care of myself but wait do you plan on moving out there house and stuff too?
Well just tell them how you feel like your ready because really its not up to nobody but you two people are going to all ways say how they feel about it but so what its your love for one another that matter and if it don't work o well you tried OK hun.

[LearningAsIGo]

Like others said--You know its right, so why hide it? Since you'll be old enough to legally do it by then, they literally cannot stop you, so give them respect as your parents and come clean.

I waited to tell my Grandmother and I was relieved when I finally did tell her since.. she died a few months later. You just don't know what can happen in life, so be as honest as possible day by day.

[sharidj]

I just want to know if you told your parents yet and what they said because I am in the same boat. I am 24 and still struggle to tell my parents I am getting married. I guess it's just hard for some of us to tell our parents. Let me know if you told them and what happened. I am looking for some suggestions!

[N0help4u]

With as old as this post is I hope you have figured out a way to tell them by now.
I would say that you just tell them that you are engaged and you are getting married on
July 19, 2008. IF they say you can not see him tell them you will still be getting married July 19, 2008 so don't they think it is better that you have the time to really get to know him better.

[BlahBlahBlah708]

I'm 18 and I just got married this week in court... my parents have no idea.. But his mom is totally happy for us and everything. We are planning to tell my parents in December and get married in a church in 2010. If you haven't already told them... I think you should have your BF talk to them alone and tell them that he wants to marry you :)

[Darleneeex3]

I'm in the same situation as your just I won't turn seventeen for luke twenty more days. My parents told me at first that they would sign for me to marry him but now they are going back on their word. I hope everything works put for your and your man :)

[SlushpuppFaFa]

I have a very similar situation. I'm 18 and my boyfriend is 17. We have been dating for 3 years and even though we are young we know that this is the right decision for us. We have been unofficially engaged for almost a year and half and he even has a ring to make it official but we know that we can't yet. He doesn't have a job and I'm paying my way through college on a part time job. He believes that his parents will full out disapprove as they have done with his older brother (they have been dating for 7 years). We need to be together, its hurting us not being together all the time and we know that we love each other, but we also know that even though we need to be together, we wouldn't be able to handle it right now. We cannot support ourselves. To me it sounds like you two have a good start and I think you should go for it if you think you can handle it. Things change though so be careful. Don't forget that things could also get more complicated once you get married. I hope this helpls a little bit and I hope that it shows the older adults reading this that just because we are young doesn't mean were stupid.

[Fr_Chuck]

Closed, posted to a three year old thread, they are most likely married and divorced by now.