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sisterlove · Aug 2, 2005, 07:57 AM

I have babysat for 1 1/2 years for a family with a 3 yr old boy and an 8 yr old girl. I actually have given them a 2 week notice to end this, as there have been many issues with them.

I have six daughters, one of which will be turning 3 soon. At first, I thought the boy was very shy and withdrawn, and I blamed it on his parents fighting all the time. As time progressed, I caught him bullying my 2 year old and our almost 3 yr old - pushing, hitting, saying mean things, etc. He has a total lack of discipline at home, so now it has gotten to where he cries when he comes because he knows he has to follow rules here - I think he's actually intimidated by me at this point, which is fine with me.

His new thing is swearing - we're talking the F bomb here. His parents listen to rap music, such as 50 Cent, and think it's hysterical when he sings along and swears. He also is telling me that his daddy hurt his feelings by stabbing him in the leg with a knife. Of course, he didn't have a mark on him.

His sister has stolen toys from the kids, lies and can be downright mean to our girls.

I know the parents, who aren't married and have split up numerous times, fight like CRAZY in front of those kids, and the mother mentioned to me 2 weeks ago that her boyfriend "pushes her around".

As far as I know, the children are not left home alone... but the teacher even called the mother because her daughter told the teacher that she gets sent to her room without dinner. Of course the mother denied it, but after everything I've seen and heard over the past year, I'm beginning to wonder if it is true.

With all the issues I've had with both children, I'm wondering if I should report them to Child Protective Services? Does stealing, cussing, bullying from the children mean there is abuse in the home? Would you turn them in?

fredg · Aug 5, 2005, 08:52 AM

Hi,
You are the baby sitter. You will be much, much happier leaving this mess.
It's up to you whether to report them or not... I personally would leave them alone, unless there are physical signs of child abuse, like bruises, etc.
Best wishes,
fredg

serialwife · Aug 5, 2005, 02:39 PM

I would definitely report this to CPS. A lot of time children emulate what they hear and see at home. Maybe his dad didn't stab him in the leg but maybe he did threaten to do so or perhaps he stabbed his mother in front of him. Committing acts of domestic violence in front of children constitutes neglect. Furthermore, allowing your 3 year old child to engage in unlawful or deliquent behaviors and laughing about these behaviors is also neglectful. Call it in and tell them you wish to remain anonymous.
Remember if you give your 2 weeks and that is the only stable influence these children have and you don't report it What will happen to these kids?

lil miss vixen · Aug 21, 2005, 04:06 PM

Wow, I'm not a parent, or and adult, I'm 15, and there are other kids at my school that would love to have been taken from their families and put in foster homes, for a better life, I'm not sure if this situation is harsh enough for the children to be actually taken away or not, but if it is, don't you think they'd grow up happier? Lets face it, it'd be tremediously hard for these kids to grow up and have successful jobs, (eg. Teacher, lawyer, doctor) I'd say allert the CPS and leave it for them to handle, your doing the right thing.

fredg · Aug 22, 2005, 06:27 AM

Hi,
Things have to be pretty bad before a court will take children out of a home, and place them in a foster home.
Things such as physical child abuse, etc.
fredg

Taukame · Nov 29, 2005, 12:36 PM

Would you rather report it and be wrong, or not report and see this family on the nightly news? If you report it and it's nothing no harm done. It will be investigated and if there's nothing going on it will be deemed unfounded. If something is going on, even if it's not a dire emergency it will give this family an opportunity to get some help if they need it.

Charlie0x · Jan 12, 2012, 11:33 PM

This may not be my place to say but I think you should at least talk to someone at CPS. It would be so hard for the kids but isn't it harder for them to be in a place like that? If something bad is going on wouldn't it be best to put them in a place where they could grow into people they'd be proud of, I mean you only live once. I don't think when they are older they would want the life they are beginning to lead, honestly, who would? I think it would be best if you report them and see what happens.