Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    alsmiley's Avatar
    alsmiley Posts: 18, Reputation: 3
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jul 23, 2007, 08:09 PM
    6 years and counting, to marry or not to marry
    I've been with my boyfriend for 6 years, is it time to get married?
    Clough's Avatar
    Clough Posts: 26,677, Reputation: 1649
    Uber Member
     
    #2

    Jul 24, 2007, 12:22 AM
    I would suggest discussing this with your boyfriend. Six years would seem a long enough courtship. If the two of you really know each other in terms of what you both would want out of a marriage, then I would say make plans to get married. But, the most important thing is to discuss this with your boyfriend. You can do it.

    If the two of you come up with some differences in opinion, then you might consider asking a third party such as the people you will find on this site, or a family and marriage counselor whom you could see live.

    I am hopeful that others will come along to offer their opinions and advice also.
    simoneaugie's Avatar
    simoneaugie Posts: 2,490, Reputation: 438
    Ultra Member
     
    #3

    Nov 5, 2007, 12:54 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by alsmiley
    I've been with my boyfriend for 6 years, is it time to get married?
    I (very negatively) believe that a marriage license is a legal document which makes it OK to have sex. Does the government provide any thing of real value along with the certificate? Learn all you can and don't enter into a marriage because it seems like the right thing to do. I'm not a churchgoer but churches have good resources to begin to explore a legal f______ situation. I could have avoided many pitfalls if I had done some information gathering. Good luck.
    Synnen's Avatar
    Synnen Posts: 7,927, Reputation: 2443
    Expert
     
    #4

    Nov 5, 2007, 01:14 AM
    I don't know... is it?

    I suspect you are asking us because you boyfriend hasn't asked YOU.

    Do you live together? My husband told me (after we were married) that it didn't seem necessary to him to get married, because what difference was a piece of paper going to make to our relationship?

    If the situation is as I have guessed, and you're mad because he hasn't asked you--have you asked HIM why?

    I had been with my husband 5 years when I told him we were getting married the next year, and if he had objections, NOW was the time to tell me, because as far as I was concerned, it was time to sh!t or get off the pot.

    My brother-in-law and his girlfriend have been together off and on for 12 years. They have no intention of EVER getting married, because they see no reason to change what's already working.

    So... I guess to answer your question--it could be, but it would help us answer you if we knew WHY you were asking.
    shygrneyzs's Avatar
    shygrneyzs Posts: 5,017, Reputation: 936
    Uber Member
     
    #5

    Nov 5, 2007, 03:23 AM
    My take on this is, if after six years of dating him and you still do not know and he apparently does not know, why are you still in the relationship?
    BigS's Avatar
    BigS Posts: 80, Reputation: 6
    Junior Member
     
    #6

    Jul 19, 2008, 05:41 PM
    Did your boyfriend mention anything about buying the cow? He has been getting the milk for free for 6 years so why should he spoil a good thing. Why all of a sudden do you want to get married. If he sees no problem with the relationship he might feel threatened about this marriage thing; was the subject ever brought up before?

    This marriage thing seems very important to you. Follow your heart. Take the chance and in the right setting talk to him in a non threatening manner, do let him know you love him so much but marriage means a lot to you. He might not have seen anything wrong with the way things are. If marriage means this much give him that dreaded ultimatum. Be prepared to have threats of him leaving forever; don't let that scare you stick to your guns. There is a possibility you might lose him forever but it maybe just what he needs to come around.

    The lines of communication and honesty needs to be opened and remain opened regardless to the outcome. If you were once telling him the answers he wants to hear and not what is really on your mind you messed up.

    Be honest to yourself and that special guy. All the best.
    FLORENCE1085's Avatar
    FLORENCE1085 Posts: 46, Reputation: 6
    Junior Member
     
    #7

    Aug 7, 2008, 04:58 PM
    If you want to get married than you need to ask him. I asked my guy and he said yes. He was just nervous about asking me. It was the best thing I did. Why wonder if you can just ask him yourself. This is 2008 we do not need to wait for men to decide when to ask :)
    i_am_the_lady's Avatar
    i_am_the_lady Posts: 14, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #8

    Mar 23, 2009, 07:25 AM
    Synnen;706197,
    I had been with my husband 5 years when I told him we were getting married the next year, and if he had objections, NOW was the time to tell me, because as far as I was concerned, it was time to sh!t or get off the pot.
    I love it! :)

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search


Check out some similar questions!

Will he marry [ 26 Answers ]

He said "I want to spend the rest of my life with you and give you all the things you deserve.". Refers to you sometimes as his wife and himself sometimes as your husband. When not at work the time is spent together. Live together,spend time with both families and acts as if married. Closed about...

Please Help Us To Get Marry! [ 12 Answers ]

Hi, I met a girl on Yahoo chat. Now she's my girlfriend. We're chating since long & we are honest to each other. We finally decided to marry. The problem is that she lives in USA I'm In Pakistan. She wants me to come to USA. Can you help by telling steps what is the procedure of marrying US...

Who will I marry? [ 1 Answers ]

What will his name be... how many kids will I have?

I want to marry him [ 4 Answers ]

I love my boyfriend. But why didn't he ask me marry him? We are both going to graduate from college. Maybe I am a little simple and know little about marriage. All I know is I love him. I wish you all happiness with family forever!

Maybe Marry After 22 Years Of Being Apart! [ 6 Answers ]

It had been 22 years ago that my long lost fiance' Ken went he's way and I went mine. He told me 2 call him 1 Friday night and I did, but his mom answered and said he was on a date, and I told her just 2 tell him 2 have a good life and I never heard from him again until I married my 1st husband. I...


View more questions Search