[kenny84]

Hi how is everyone doing?

Let me give you a brief synopsis of what's going on. My girlfriend and I have been together for about 15 months now and things are going great and they still are, but we tend to argue on average about once a week. Now this has been going on now for the last year or so, and it started about 2 months into our relationship. Now I'm not saying all the arguing is pointless because we do learn a lot about ourselves and each other from it but it has been going on for about a year now. The meaning of our fights seem to dull and it starting to get to the point where its no longer we're fighting because there are issues but because she is just so sensitive.
Yesterday I told her that I was going on a one day trip with one of my friends because the opportunity just came, its going to be low cost and its just a mini vacation before I start work again. She later tells me she think she's upset at me because I've made empty promises to her before about things we were going to do but I didn't fulfill because of whatever reason. Then last night I placed the blame on her telling her that the reason we fight so much is because she gets upset so quickly and blows things out of proportion. I'm a very laid back person I don't take offense easily I let things go quickly and because of that sometimes I'm blunt and insensitive.
She was really hurt by the things I said last night. She said it makes her feel like a horrible person because all the blame is on her.
Very rarely is the blame all on one person, and the more and more I type and I think about it, the more and more that I can see that.

But her getting upset so easily does lead us into a lot of arguments, does anyone have any advice?

[nicespringgirl]

A short break will be a good thing to do, not too long... My friend has been through exact the same thing as you do, they took a break about couple weeks(not seeing or talking got each other), then everything just worked fine after that. They now are planning getting married in Dec. It also depends on each case because we all know everyone is different at different things. So my advice was from someone's experience, it still depends on u. but I'd like to share it with you, hope it will help.
Good luck:)

[StripClubDJBobbyMac]

Hey Kenny,
Iwork with a lot of women and I can tell you this... Just the fact that you are asking for help is a sign that you want to keep her, so ask yourself what are the arguments fundamentally about (the topic)? She wants more time/attention - she doesn't want to share you - doesn't approve of your friends - wants to be included on your mini vacations - doesn't trust you being out with the guys- you need more peersonal space - etc.
Then you have 2 basic lines of action-
1. Consider and work out with each other a fair compromise that makes her feel like you do want care and need her in your life so that BOTH of you are getting what you love about each other out ofthis relationship
-or-
2. Examine the possability that though you are attracted to each other in some ways, your lives have different needs in MANY ways and you are forcing the 20% love to overcome the other 80% of each others life. Doesn't sound nice bu forced relationships will always cause arguments. When they start - they usually get worse with each round of fighting comes harder blows, stronger hurtful words and actions... and you know where that will go - both of you hating or hurting each other somewhere you don't want to be hurt.
The only thing worse than NO RELATIONSHIP - is a BAD RELATIONSHIP
With that said - I hope due to your concern that things are not there yet and you can work this whole thing out.
My suggestion of where to start is to begin somewhere nutral and romantic. Never discuss arguments in the home - it is supposed to be your place of peace and safety - Take her out to her favorite place and start the courtship over with sincerety. Maybe where you went on your first or most favorite date.. Do something nice for her and try telling her how important it is that you both try and start over with the things that made you like each other in the first place and that from this point on... the weapons ARE LAID DOWN - the past is the pastt and doesn''t need to ruin your future - Try it out, either way you did the right thing to try and make it work! -BMAC-

[talaniman]

Be patient and give her more quality attention, before she asks for it, by blowing up at you.

[Dennis777]

Hello.

Arguments like your talking about are built up problems she has and when her cup fills up she strikes out at you. The key is to learn to talk with each other not at each other. When she has a small problem talk about it and fix it then. In time you will find that you can work out most problems without even knowing your doing it.

Good Luck
Dennis777