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Pook_Myster · Jul 10, 2007, 11:20 PM

:eek: Hi Everyone,

Does anyone else get sick and tired of reading posts on here from women asking for advice on what to do because they are heartbroken and torn that they are dating married men?

I would like to open this up for all of us who aren't dating married men - and it can become a bit of a standing forum that all of those who are dating married men to refer to when they want advice.

1. Yes - you are stupid
2. No - He does not love you
3. No - he is not going to leave his wife
4. No - he is probably not going to get a divorce
5. Yes - if he cheated on his wife, he will probably cheat on you too.

Can we add all add from here and pray that it will mean we can all stop offering advice to those silly enough to believe what these nasty men say.

Haxzor50 · Jul 11, 2007, 12:34 AM

Ahh...

Yes! How about three cheers for sweet revenge on all of those nasty men!!

iAMfromHuntersBar · Jul 11, 2007, 12:58 AM

Although I applaud the sentiment of your post I don't really agree with you completely, I think each case needs to be looked at individually... if we could just blanket each question with threads like this... well this site would just be full of vague answers!

Also, there are men (and women) who are in loveless marriages who do leave their wives (or husbands), get divorced, settle down with girlfriend (or boyfriend) they love and spend the rest of their lives together!

I don't think all adulterers should be tarred with the same brush!

Thanks for listening!

J

Haxzor50 · Jul 11, 2007, 01:00 AM

Well Three cheers for sweet revenge on the men that do that for the wrong reasons!

Bluerose · Jul 11, 2007, 01:01 AM

Okay, 2 things.

1) I was living with a married but separated man for five years then discovered that he was cheating on me with his wife! One day he turned around and told me they were getting back together!

2) The thing to remember is.. If a married man can treat his wife, the mother of his children with so little respect what chance do you (the other woman) have?! "

Ladies, respect yourselves. No married (or separated) man is going to make you happy. If you do find a separated man, back off until he has all his affairs in order - no pun intended.

Marily · Jul 11, 2007, 06:37 AM

I agree with you, adultery just makes me sick

startover22 · Jul 11, 2007, 10:16 AM

I would just die if my husband did this to me and yes it would kill me if I did it to him. (the guilt alone would tip me over the edge) I posted something similar to this but I didn't call them stupid. I also think that not all situations are the same and sometimes looking into it, you finally realize this. That is why I am a crank sometimes and a love sometimes... Just love the one you are with, especially if you are married. You gain self respect making a marriage work. A lot of it.

victoria_mitchell · Jul 11, 2007, 10:52 AM

As I posted last month to someone else's question

I'm dating a married man. ((how dumb does that sound!))

It sounds more pathetic, disgusting, mean, cruel terrible, heartless..... etc

My X Fiance and I were deeply in love and so happy and because of a girl like you, hell maybe it was you, tore us apart. I HATE CHEATERS! And to be honest you're giving us girls a bad name to which I don't really appreciate and neither do other people I'm sure

Comments on this post
Raynefreak agrees: isnt that the f-ing truth

And I would like to add that this is why men cheat in the first place!! If there weren't any hussies to cheat with then there would be no cheaters in the first place! And women wonder why they are looked at as "objects"... Sad, Sad and very Pathetic

victoria_mitchell · Jul 11, 2007, 11:43 AM

startover22 agrees: That would be a hearless answer if the Hussy had no idea the man was married!!! Be a little nicer cause each story is different!

What I stated was directly towards hussies; Just as I stated.

If you didn't know any better or have ANY knowledge that he was married/taken then you are not a hussie, you are just naïve and should get out of it ASAP.

Sorry for the misconception

Dennis777 · Jul 11, 2007, 12:11 PM

Hello.

I never have understood why people think they can change others. If a man / lady has cheated on their husband / wife how can you honestly think they will not cheat on you. I have been giving advice on this type of site for over 20 years now and the never ending statement of "he / she would never do that to me" OR "its wasn't his / her fault they where pushed into it" OR the best one "it just happened". The bad thing is people believe that B.S. every day. Some from more then one person. I can't count how many times I have received questions that say they have been cheated on in many of their past relationships. Maybe you should start looking at where your finding your Mr. or Mrs. Right at next time.

If a person is in a loveless relationship then get out before you start the new relationship.

Dennis777

shygrneyzs · Jul 11, 2007, 01:07 PM

I am not dating a married man, not dating at all. Lol. But once, when I was 22, I met a guy who never told me he was married. We dated for three months and I honestly never had clue one. We saw each other a few times a week and my weekends off. Never slept over - I worked nights so I did not put two and two togather. I had told him from the first date this was not going to be a sexual relationship until there was a wedding. So that eliminated that element. One night his best friend came over and asked me if he was there and I said no, I did not expect him. He asked if he could wait and I said no, I was about to get ready for work. Then he sat down and told me that my boyfriend was already married. He told me he had to tell me, could not stand to see his friend doing the double life thing.
What a shock! You could have knocked over with a feather. I went to work that night thinking how I could justify murder. He called me at work and asked me to meet him for breakfast, which I did. As we were sitting there, drinking coffee, I told him what I found out. He did not deny any of it. Gave me the song and dance about unhappy and not in love and all that razzle. I got up from the table, coffee cup in hand, and poured it on his lap. Walked out. Changed my phone number and that was that.
Women deserve more respect from themselves than to put up with a guy who is never going to be accessible.

Haxzor50 · Jul 11, 2007, 01:44 PM

This could be it...

You take a mortal man,
And put him in control
Watch him become a god,
Watch peoples heads aroll
Aroll...

/chorus/
Just like the pied piper
Led rats through the streets
We dance like marionettes,
Swaying to the symphony...
Of destruction

Acting like a robot,
Its metal brain corrodes.
You try to take its pulse,
Before the head explodes.
Explodes...

/chorus/

The earth starts to rumble
World powers fall
Awarring for the heavens,
A peaceful man stands tall
Tall...

Reminds me of married men cheating...

And all the dumb women that fall for their cunning ways ;)

startover22 · Jul 11, 2007, 01:58 PM

Hmmmmmmm that was pretty strong and raw. Liked it though! Thanks for sharing. Let's all remember that every situation does vary.

Haxzor50 · Jul 11, 2007, 02:29 PM

It's megadeth, has to be strong a raw :)

it kind of does remind me of it though.. how a man gains total control, and then looses it all in the end anyway... even if every situation is different, I'm talking about the ones that happen exactly like she explained above ^_^

startover22 · Jul 11, 2007, 02:33 PM

I hate to let everyone know but I at first thought it was Anthrax. Yes I used to love that kind of music but my son was born 13 years ago and I stopped listening to it. My favaorite was Danzig, I still melt when I hear it. Anyway that would be a whole other post so as you were saying. Men can have no control over me like that. I wish it the same for all of us women. And as for Victoria, thanks for clearing it up. I appreciate it!

Haxzor50 · Jul 11, 2007, 02:41 PM

AHH anthrax... I did actually like their remake of "im the man" twas funny...

But yes... that is megadeth's best song...

Pook_Myster · Jul 11, 2007, 04:39 PM

I know we seem to justify it by saying that 'every situation is different'

But...

If it was an acceptable behaviour - why would it be in the 10 commandments of things NOT to do... Though shall NOT commit adultry.

I agree that marriages can come to an end... but NEVER should it be because of a third party... if it's over, let it be over, but let it be over for the right reasons... another woman, or another man, influencing your decision to end a marriage is not right in my books... and it just makes me cranky that it happens

I feel that it happens because in today's society people lack respect for each other - and without respect, how can love grow?

startover22 · Jul 11, 2007, 04:45 PM

That is not what I was saying Pook, I agree with you completely. We have a lack of respect in this day and age. I am teaching my children differently and living my life well too!

tobeamiss · Jul 18, 2007, 10:07 PM

I get so tired of hearing each situation is different. Cheating is cheating unless you honestly don't know that the other is married.

iAMfromHuntersBar · Jul 19, 2007, 12:27 AM

Originally Posted by tobeamiss

I get so tired of hearing each situation is different.

Why? Every situation IS different!

What about a man who is constantly beating and abusing his wife, another man comes along and offers to take her away, to save her from this terrible life.

Are you seriously saying she should say
"Well, wait up, I'll get a divorce first THEN we can have a relationship!"

Nah, I don't think so!

I agree that a lot of people in extra-marital affairs are in the wrong, hell I've even told them so on this forum before! I just don't think we should blanket EVERYONE with the same stereotype!

Imagine if someone who has real problems, on the brink of a breakdown, logs onto this site for help, and this is the first thread he/she sees? I wouldn't want to be the one responsible for tipping them over the edge!