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    margarita_momma's Avatar
    margarita_momma Posts: 299, Reputation: 46
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    #1

    Jun 13, 2007, 08:37 AM
    Why rush in.
    Why does it seem like every guy I meet and like they want to rush into a relationship with me? I feel like I have this weird vibe fuming off me that make men want to tell me they love me right away and be with me every second of the day. I just got out of a bad marriage and I am not really looking for anyone. I kind of want to be by myself, but every now and then I will meet a nice guy and talk to him and then he won't leave me alone. Maybe I just attract weirdos that are obsessed with women that pay attention to them. :rolleyes:
    Xaniz's Avatar
    Xaniz Posts: 40, Reputation: 1
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    #2

    Jun 13, 2007, 09:19 AM
    First of all how old are you

    Second of all I am not reliable so don't expect real help from me but ill try
    margarita_momma's Avatar
    margarita_momma Posts: 299, Reputation: 46
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    #3

    Jun 13, 2007, 10:03 AM
    I'm 22.
    Xaniz's Avatar
    Xaniz Posts: 40, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Jun 13, 2007, 10:04 AM
    Mabye your just super atractive I don't know
    kp2171's Avatar
    kp2171 Posts: 5,318, Reputation: 1612
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    #5

    Jul 31, 2007, 07:46 AM
    You are young and you are attractive.

    I'm guessing you are seeing mostly other young-ish men. It took me a few tries through serious relationships before I understood how easy it is, especially when young or less experienced, to force the "love" issue. Its new, its interesting, it's a hat we desperately want to try on.

    So... on one side you are beautiful and you are young. Some would say that isn't a burden and theyd love to have that attention. And on the other side, well, you know how screwed it is when every guy wants in your pants the moment he meets you.

    I dated a girl after wed both had monumental love of our life breakups. She said on the third date how nice it was to be with a guy who wasn't trying just to get into her pants. I told her not to be mistaken, I was madly attracted to her and I did want to get in her pants, but how about later after were done b!tching about our exs. Pass the beer.

    The next girl I dated after that was 7 years younger than me, and mentally older than me in many ways. I was just getting myself to understand what a healthy relationship was at 27, and she was 20 and already had a healthy balance mentally.

    So I don't know the answer. Most guys I know are morons until at least their late 20's. Some are wiser early. Some never buy a clue.

    It took a long, long time for me to find the right person for me. Now married 7 years. I had some great relationships along the way. I had some terrible crash and burns. I had some periods when I didn't want to date anyone. And some when I couldn't get a date or find anyone id want to date for the life of me. And then of course id have 3 girls all at once that id want to date. Stupid, silly life.

    So... know that you are going to have to put up with this crap to some degree always. My wife is attractive, powerful, and charismatic. She gets hit on. She gets hit on by men who know she's married and don't care. She just knows she has to deal with it sometimes, even if that means the stupid noise of having what should be a decent relationship with a guy pushed back cause he can't keep his pants separate from his brain.

    It takes time. Somewhere along the way you'll find friends, some will be guys. None will be like what you had when younger. Sometimes it takes forever to find them. But don't give up. Its just not as easy as it could be, and that's sometimes a shame.
    s_cianci's Avatar
    s_cianci Posts: 5,472, Reputation: 760
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    #6

    Jul 31, 2007, 09:43 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by margarita_momma
    Maybe I just attract weirdos that are obsessed with women that pay attention to them. :rolleyes:
    I'm not sure I would word it quite that way. But it is possible that you have a propensity for attracting the needy-type guy who is insecure and clingy. As many on this forum will tell you, neediness/clinginess is one of the biggest turn-offs, for either gender. What type of person was your husband? Was insecurity an issue for him that contributed to the breakup of your marriage? Maybe you should look back at your past relationships and look for patterns and consistencies. That can maybe give you some cues on what to avoid in the future.
    Canada_Sweety's Avatar
    Canada_Sweety Posts: 597, Reputation: 49
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    #7

    Jul 31, 2007, 09:48 AM
    I attract slobs & weirdos all the time. Maybe you should jsut wait a bit longer till you meet someoen who is actually right for you... or at least decent:p

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