Originally Posted by
xxsamxx110
1. Then why is he telling us he doesn't plan on getting married. That's just a lie. Why can't he be straight? We weren't bothered when my mother got married and that's more complicated.
2. I had thought that but then why not at least tell his 2 sons.
3. Why not confront him? If I was moving someone is then I'm sure he would say something. My dad's girlfriend is only after the house and money. She has said all along she doesn't like kids and when my dad was talking to my mum about my brothers she nearly flipped. She hates that he has a past which includes my brothers and me. I am fully aware that I am old enough to move out and as I said was saving to buy. It's quite hard to save a deposit that is large enough now. I am looking to rent now just to get out. But hey it's hard to get started on housing. Why should I be forced to move when I put nearly every penny I have into this house/ my home? My point wasn't the permission. It was the lying. He's changed since she's been on the scene and not in a good way. He will pick fights, shout abusive comments and generally has no respect or care for my brothers or myself. My past has nothing to do with him and I'm perfectly fine with that. I live here too and I'm also meant to be family. I'm sorry to hear that it means so little to people. So much for blood being thicker than water.
1 - Because he doesn't feel a need to explain anything to you and if he tells you there will be an argument. He is taking the high road and not telling you, avoiding the "confrontation," as you put it.
2 - Because if he tells your brothers they will tell you.
3 - Unless the girlfriend has said "I'm only after your house and your money" (and your father actually has a house and enough money to make it worth marrying him) you are improvising statements or thoughts to make her look bad OR to justify your thinking.
Your father is so unlovable that this person can't possibly be in love with him?
She does like all kids or she doesn't like you?
4 - I was not aware that you are supporting the house, have put money into improvements. Tell your father you want your money back. It would be reasonable for him to reimburse you for the improvements you have made. The majority of people move from their father's house to a rental. They do not buy. That's how the economy is right now.
5 - You live here, too? You live in your father's house. He gets to make the rules and make the decision in his life. For that matter, he gets to make the decision in your life.
You want to be independent? Move out.
The fact probably is that if he ends his relationship with this woman and gets sick you are not going to sacrifice the rest of your life taking care of him. You will eventually meet someone and start a new life. She will be his wife.
It is totally unfair for you to attempt to direct how and in what fashion your father lives his life.
Does your OCD have anything to do with your feelings toward her?
I am both a second wife AND a stepmother, and I am having a great deal of difficulty understanding your attitude. I would think you would be less worried about who inherits the house and all of your father's money and more worried about his happiness.
And if you're right and he's wrong, then you can say, "I told you so" pretty much for all eternity.