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    anon890's Avatar
    anon890 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Nov 13, 2011, 06:59 AM
    Hi, I am 25 & my fiancˇ is 28, we r planning to get married this year.
    The thing is that I am a virgin & planning to remain one until our wedding night. My fiancˇ has assured me that he will respect my decision; he is remaining true to his promise, but he is always talking about having sex with me[like how is he going to do it, different positions he wants to do it with me & all]. When he does that I do not know what to think about him. My knowledge about men is obviously very limited. What I wish to know is does every man talk like this to their girls? Is my fiancˇ normal? Does he truly love me?
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #2

    Nov 13, 2011, 07:13 AM
    Depends on how he talks to you - is he condescending, threatening, gentle? Sometimes men think this type of conversation is a turn on to women.

    You are going to marry this man - ASK HIM why he is talking like this. Tell him he is beginning to worry you.

    Does he love you? I have no idea. If he plans to marry you I would assume he does.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #3

    Nov 13, 2011, 07:22 AM
    And men like to talk ( often more talk than action at times) they like to think, dream and day dream about sex.

    Perhaps he is wanting to hear your ideas about positions or things you may want to try, perhaps he is wanting you to talk "dirty" back to him.

    It all depends on how he is doing it, and in what context
    GGertie's Avatar
    GGertie Posts: 36, Reputation: 5
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    #4

    Nov 13, 2011, 07:37 PM
    Sweetie, I don't think most men talk to their beloved in the manner you describe, but I don't think that means he isn't normal. It certainly seems that he loves you if he is willing to respect your wishes and wait.

    A couple of things here... While your desire to remain a virgin is admirable, that along with your feeling uncomfortable with his talk about about sex, plus your wondering whether he loves you makes me wonder if you are ready for marriage. I just have an uncomfortable feeling that your expectations of the "wedding night" and marriage in general are unrealistic and that you are going to be sadly disappointed. He may have the same feeling and is trying to gauge your reaction (with his sex talk) to get some idea of what he can expect.

    If you are engaged to be married, you should be able to ask your fiancé why he talks to you that way, and you should be able to tell him how that makes you feel. I have a hunch you both would be more comfortable if you had sex before the "big day."

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