[nindzha]

I have a question.
I think I have a "gift" to see people on the inside who they really are.
I can feel their intetntions, I can feel what they are thinking I can see their week ponits, feel what they feel. And this feelings are really deep. Like I was in their body, methaphoricly speaking. For example I can feel every time when a girl likes me but I can see this on guys too and not few. I can know why people are saying some tings or why they act as they do. I can feel when they are hideing some things.
Don't get me wrong I am not a mindreader, I can just feel.
At first I thought my mind is playing with me, that I am making this up in my mind, but through time I saw that it is true.

Now it bothers me, if I should bring this up with the people I interact, I mean should I tell them their faults and explain things to them, should I tell them that I know how they feel towards some things. This is very hard becaue I would in some way embares them,
How would you feel if someone would tell you some things that were meant only for you to know, that where your secrets?
How would you react?

PS As I read this through I know it sounds strange probably some won't understand, but please try to answer the last two questions.
If someone has the same experiences please let me know thank you.
Andrew

[RubyPitbull]

How would u feel if someone would tell u some things that were ment only for u to know, that where your secrets?
How would you react?

I have never experienced what you are experiencing so I cannot tell you I understand completely what you are going through.

I can tell you that I would probably not like people telling me stuff about myself especially personal stuff that would embarrass me. My reaction would be to pull away from that person because it would scare me to have them know my secrets.

Just my personal view.

You may want to also post this under the spirituality or psychic section. Maybe someone else can give you a bit more guidance to explain what it is you are going through.

[phillysteakandcheese]

You have a gift. You now also need an ethical code of behavior for yourself.

You may have perceptions about a person, but that doesn't mean you should walk up to them and start berating them about "thier faults". You're not supposed to try and "fix" every man, woman, child, and animal that crosses your path. You might come across particular individuals though that you do need to stop and strike up a conversation with, and plant a suggestion about how they might be able to help themselves.

When you do meet and talk to someone, you probably want to be open and tell them you have paranormal perception and can "feel" things about people. Some people will have their interest peeked and ask you more, and really get into it with you, and it will develop your relationship skills. Others will give you a funny look and then decide they have to get away from you... And when that happens, you'll probably already know why they are trying to hide.

How you decide to handle this "information" is up to you. Developing a personal code of ethics will help you decide when you "need" to reach out to someone, and when you need to "lay back" and be an observer.

[shygrneyzs]

I have a gift too, my intuition tells me right off if the person is honest or not, can be trusted or not, is verifiable or full of baloney. There have been times I have ignored my intuition and tried to give the person the benefit of the doubt and have deeply regretted it. I also can see one's soul in their eyes and there are many times I wish I did not. As to their thoughts, I do not know it all the time, some people are better at masking than others. But I NEVER ever would consider coming up to someone and pointing out their faults and shortcomings. Not unless I want a punch in the face or called names and have someone storm off. It is like Philly said - you have a code of ethics to live by - we all do as human beings in all our relationships with others. How would you like it if someone came up to you and started in on your faults? Not nice.

[nindzha]

I can see this is realtive to the pearson, if soemone would come to me and told me what I am doing "wrong" directly, but in a nice way, I would be very glad and I am not jokeing.
In fact I very much wish to meet a sicnere pearson, who is capabel of "reading" people.
Why? Because I seek perfection.
And it is very difficult to judge yourself because you are not objective.

[NeedKarma]

There is no 'perfection' in people simply because everyone's perception of perfection is different. What you want to do reminds me of religious types who think I'm on the wrong path (because it's not the same as their path) and try to change me.

[nindzha]

A very very smart answer!
But tell me what do you seek in your life?

[valinors_sorrow]

What you are is called highly intuitive or empathic in my circles. I am also. I have learned over the years many things about it from trying different approaches. It can be both a gift and a burden. I think I know where most of this ability comes from and I am comfortable with that. I have learned I cannot prevent another's pain by warning them. I cannot prevent poor outcomes by telling what I know. I now realise my "knowing" is only half the equation -- that even more important is the "receptor"... the person who needs to be actually interested in this information.

It took me a long time to surround myself with people who are truthful to themselves and feel safe with my ability to "see" as far as I do. Some still like to call me psychic when I reveal the full effect of it - a term I disagree with. If I showed how this is to others too openly, I would scare people and I know that. I use my gift only when asked but those who do ask benefit greatly. I tend to gain a reputation wherever I go that you don't ask Val anything unless you want an deeply honest answer and that helps to edit out those who are not ready. But I built that reputation carefully, knowing people are more fragile than they like to appear. I mostly use it to benefit myself, my husband and our close friends who are very comfortable with it.

Having researched this for a long time. I have come to the conclusion that most people could be a lot more like this and choose in subtle, subconscious ways not to be. Its saddens me because we all would be better off with more awareness like this -- just look at my name to see some of that sadness. We live (atleast in the US) in a culture that has supported people being "asleep" and to our collective ruin too. But as the wise old saying suggested, when the student is ready, the teacher will appear-- that was, by the way, instructions as much for the teacher as it is for the student. Learn to use your gift to discern who is ready and be very very conservative in your offering to them. It still takes me some effort to keep my mouth shut in some circumstances, if that helps you any. LOL

PS - I disagree with your statement about lacking onbjectivity concerning yourself. That's called maturity and many non-empathic people have it too.

[NeedKarma]

A very very smart answer!
But tell me what do you seek in your life?

Easy answer for me: I seek to be a good person to others, a good husband and a good father. I also seek new experiences to make life interesting, whether it's meeting new people, travelling to new places, etc. Life is as complicated as we make it.

I have met a lot of people in my lifetime so far and I can read people as well. I do not profess to want to change anyone but rather I make it a point to stay away (or aware) of the people with bad intentions. So I guess I use my skills for personal use.

[nindzha]

For starters let me say I am only 19 years old and so I am not experienced as you probably are.
If I understand you all correctly what you are saying is:
Mind your own buissnes?

But unfourtently I am a kind of pearson that can't sleep on that.
Why shouldn't I help if I have the resources to do that, deep inside is sense why but can you please explain in words.
Thank you

[shygrneyzs]

I answered your question in my post - here was your question:

Now it bothers me, if I should bring this up with the people I interact, I mean should I tell them their faults and explain things to them, should I tell them that I know how they feel towards some things. This is very hard becaue I would in some way embares them,
How would you feel if someone would tell you some things that were meant only for you to know, that where your secrets?
How would you react?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I merely told you how someone might feel if you approached them just because you felt the need to point out their faults. And why I do not do that to people. For being so intuitive, you appear to lack some tact. I am telling you to develop some sense of propriety with your "gift". Your own statements about wanting to go and point things out to people are your own liability, not mine.

[nindzha]

I don't understand you at all.
Or you don't understand me.

Quote
"I merely told you how someone might feel if you approached them just because you felt the need to point out their faults."

-I would never aproach with this things to someone who, I met the first time.
I was thinking about friends and people who I am closer to.
And not a stranger on the bus. :)
I would never aproach a friend with the reason to point finger at him and judge him like I am the god.

Quote
"Your own statements about wanting to go and point things out to people are your own liability, not mine"

-Who is referring to you?

Quote
"I am telling you to develop some sense of propriety with your "gift".

-I agree.

[valinors_sorrow]

For starters let me say i am only 19 years old and so i am not experianced as u probably are.
If i understand u all correctly what u are saying is:
Mind your own buissnes?

But unfourtently i am a kind of pearson that can't sleep on that.
Why souldnt i help if i have the resources to do that, deep inside is sence why but can u please explain in words.
Thank you

You can learn how to "sleep on that". Most young people need to learn some variation of this too -- appropriate boundaries come with maturity. Concerning the kind of help you are describing--- help that is not asked for is not help. You can actually do damage to someone with the best of intentions. Its really as simple as that. Perhaps you should pursue a degree in psychology?

[RubyPitbull]

V Sorrows wrote: Perhaps you should pursue a degree in psychology?

--That is an excellent idea that is worth your consideration! Nindza, considering the gift that you have, that would be a great idea. People would specifically be going to you for help so you wouldn't be telling someone something they don't want to hear or scare them (as it would me unless I asked for your help).

[nindzha]

You can actually do damage to someone with the best of intentions. Its really as simple as that.

I have heard this saying before. It is the answer I have expected.
But I don't understand it, can you eloborate.

Psyhology is something that I wish to study, but here in Europe you need a LOT of "points" to go and study psychology. Its equal to studieing medicine.
And I think I can't qualifiy. :(
The system got me.

[J_9]

I can see this is realtive to the pearson, if soemone would come to me and told me what i am doing "wrong" directly, but in a nice way, i would be very glad and i am not jokeing.
In fact i very much wish to meet a sicnere pearson, who is capabel of "reading" people.
Why? Because i seek perfection.
And it is very difficult to judge yourself because u are not objective.

That may be good for you. You may be able to take that kind of constructive criticism, but most people cannot. Many people would look at you as though you are crazy or even punch you in the nose. It is always best to keep your thoughts to yourself, unless you are in a position to discuss it. Such as a psychologist as Val suggested.

You say you seek perfection. Well, that is something that no one ever finds. In psychology is called Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. The first need is the basics, air, food and water. The final Need is perfection/self actualization. Many psychologists/psychiatrists have studied it over the years and have come to a current conclusion that TRUE perfection/self-actualization is unattainable. We will ALWAYS find at least one fault with ourselves.

So, until and unless you understand that perfection can not be 100% attained, you run the risk of hurting yourself mentally and/or emotionally.

I know I will probably get a disagree for that, but we just studied this in college class, Psych 211, last week.

[IzzyWizzy]

Hmm.. interesting dilemma. Well personally, I think you would make a great psychologist, but that's besides the point.
Well honestly, I would probably feel a little uncomfortable, but as long as you keep their secrets, and a good attitude about it all then I don't think people would feel thaat weird.. they would get used to it. After all, a gift as you seem to possess should not be wasted. =]

[RubyPitbull]

RubyPitbull wrote: You may want to also post this under the spirituality or psychic section. Maybe someone else can give you a bit more guidance to explain what it is you are going through.

I posted the above in my first response to Nindzha. Thank you Zorba. I was hoping someone would stop by this posting and give him something a bit more guidance than we could offer.

[valinors_sorrow]

When I read this thread over from the top, I hear Nindzha doing what is sometimes called "Yeah but" where you agree with the answers given but then argue against then by pointing out how what was suggested won't work. Doing that will make the conversation come to a dead end since you not only debating with those who are trying to help you but you are frustrating the person talking to you in the process.

If you are as empathic as you say you are, you would be in tune with all of that-- but apparently you are not. I suggest you focus on further deveoping your "gift" more since at this point you are your own worst enemy repeatedly saying things like yeah... but...

[nindzha]

Val I must 100% agree with you, truly.
I know.

As I was writing what I wrote I KNEW that someone will bring this up (I think we are very much alike.)


BUT I have so many questions in my mind!

Thank you all for takeing your time and energy in helping me with this issue.

I think that the sentence from Val "help that is not asked for is not help."
Is the most "close answer" for my question.

What I ll try to do, is not to look people any more, and only live my life.
And if somebody comes to me and asks for my opinion, I ll give him one.
That's it, and I ll try to stop worreing about how people live their lives.


Again thank you all for particepating in this thread.

PS: I have some more questions about things in life. The topic is spirituality and people.
If anyone is willing to answer any of this questions please let me know.

Regards

Andrej