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annatorres54 · Feb 24, 2015, 04:34 PM

Im 15 and turning 16. Ive been wanting to live with my mom for 2-3 years now. My dad always says no and says has things against her, They have never been married but my dads had me since was 8 months. I want to know if its possible for me to run away and live with my mom. Im not wanting to move out because I don't like the rules or anything like that. Im just tired of getting put down and everything my dad buys me he will use it against me and tells me he won't buy me anything that I can do it myself. I don't like my step mom she doesn't clean her lifestyle is just gross. So my brother and I are stuck cleaning. So is it okay for me to live with my mom ? When I turn 16 can I move out

relationshipgir · Feb 24, 2015, 05:56 PM

I would say running away will not be the best decision because that might put you in a worse situation, also choosing to live on your own might not be the best decision either because your not at an age yet to be independent there are bills responsibilities, a lot of headaches. But I would say try to connect to your mother and ask her to ask your father that you would like to live with her, since your dad is not listening but I would try to talk to your father again, even try to write it down, about it and tell him what you really want. Also try to ask that you would like to visit her, mabye try to ask you would like visiting as an option every so often and see how that works.

talaniman · Feb 24, 2015, 06:55 PM

How much contact have you had with your mom over the years? What kind of relationship do you have with her? If you and your brother have had little to none, then running away is a lousy idea, and is a lousy idea anyway.

My suggestions depend on your answers to my questions.

Fr_Chuck · Feb 24, 2015, 08:11 PM

No, it is illegal to run away to live with your mom. There should be a legal court paper giving your dad custody. To be honest, for a dad to have custody, there must have been serious issues with your mom, or her life style at the time of your birth. Also you are forgetting all the years of care that your dad has done. Of course he will threaten not to buy you things when you are not following the rules, Why should he reward an ungrateful child?

I also agree, while your mom may have changed from what issues she had in her life, at this point, what contact do you have? How often do you visit and live with her?
Does your mom help with Child support payments to your dad? If not why?

Running away can get your mom in legal troubles and even get you in legal trouble.

Alty · Feb 24, 2015, 09:09 PM

I agree with Fr Chuck.

If you run away then you can kiss any chance of your mom having legal rights to you, away.

You're a child, and as a child you do not have the right to make the decisions on who you live with. Your dad was awarded custody for a reason.

You sound like a typical teen, don't like the fact that you don't get whatever you want, that you have to help clean the home you live in. Sounds to me like your dad is a great dad, he's grooming you for the real world, so you'll know that everything isn't just handed to you, you have to earn it, and if there's a mess, you have to clean it. Your life is not at all hard.

Having said that, what is your moms life like? Have you visited her? Bet you'll have to clean at her home too, and earn the things you want to have.

Bottom line, if you want to go live with your mom it will have to be done legally. Your mom will have to petition for custody in court.

ScottGem · Feb 25, 2015, 07:21 AM

I've moved this from the Teens forum since it is a legal issue. And any question on law needs to include your general locale as laws vary by area.

In most areas a child cannot choose where to live until they are 18. So the likely scenario here is that your mom needs to go to court to get primary custody for you.