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Your ex is acting all friendly to you because she now knows what she's lost,and she
Wants it back...

Your ex is doing her own thing,as well as wanting you back.

... Well,be strong and tell...

Usually,as a result of a break-up there are a lot of emotions,the usual rule is NO CONTACT with ex's.

Sadly,in this case,also,you've found this out,the hard way. By
Contacting her again,you've...

Firstly,I would say to be very wary of this person,as he has NO control over
His anger,which is very dangerous.



That's all it is,good friends,& you certainly weren't with him long enough to...

I believe you do,and the fact that you've posted on this site,really shows that you
care for this girl :)



It's great to know that she has such a friend as YOU in her time of need,BUT
You'll...

I can understand,from this,that it was ONLY friendship that you had,with this other
Male,wich left you open to get back with your ex.



Yes,it would be much better to tell him the truth,which...

It can't be easy for you to find out that,not only had he been involved with another
Girl,he'd been doing it for two years!

I believe,that,he went back and forth trying to mend both ends,because...

Don't feel bad about this,it's what relationships are for! Some will work out &
Some won't. It often happens that way.

I notice that you give (quite a LONG) list of your good points. Do you tell...

Firstly,I'm really sorry that you had to go through this,as no one ever should. Also,no matter what happened,it's NOT your fault.



Yes,as you could see that he was the type who would go "from...

In your question,you mention that,you know you feel stronger towards drew...
That's your heart telling you what's right! Always follow
What it says.

No,it won't be easy to "do the right...

I can understand that would hurt your feelings,BUT is it not better,to preserve
Your health,to maintain no contact with her?

I think that you're quite right to be cautious,after all,you want to be loved for who you are.



From this,it's clear that at least you're friendly with him (being in contact so often.)
...

EXACTLY, you've got it! You were so tied up with her,and a relationship that
wouldn't work.

Like you say,for some reason,you felt obliged to her alone :eek:

**All the best for the future**

Not only does she have a boyfriend,& you're trying to pursue her,which is VERYwrong,there's more...



And so he would,as he could trust his girlfriend [or so he thought!! ]

Apart from the...

Whatever made you think that there ever was going to be an "us"?
That was a bit heavy,considering that you'd only given it a few days for a friendship to develop :(



Does that not tell you...

This is where you should've STOPPED!! He has a girlfriend,& already spoken
For.



When you love yourself,you will then have much more self-esteem and
Therefore not have the need,or desire to...

By going out with other people,you have them to "distract" you from your pain :)

I know this can't be easy,but it will get better in time.

You've done the first step,by posting here,and...

I can understand why you're "lost and confused" in this situation {after all,you're in
The middle of it all! }

Feelings of love for a best friend can be quickly acted upon {in the wrong way}...

"what ever caused yours to fail will cause his" You know I really do believe that!

You're rid of him,and all the emotional baggage he brought into the relationship.
It won't be long before he's...

I believe that,because of your past hurts,you've become very insecure as a result
Of this.

Then,it follows, that you're bringing your past,too,into this situation :(



It takes time to...

... Yes,that's exactly what it means when a relationship breaks up.

For sure,before the break-up is final,there will be various "details" that you both
Will need to look at [and you mention some...

... You gave her what she wanted so she doesn't need to bother with
You now. :(

... That's what happens with an ex,no matter how long they've been apart.

If you don't want hurt,don't get in touch with your ex,no matter how much you
Want to!!

You gave her what she...

To be honest,I'm rather confused. One minute you're saying that you're " having a ball"
Without her,the next you say,that,you'd "love to give this up to be her man again" :confused:



Yes,by...

Long distance relationships rarely ever work out. After giving this relationship a go,
You've now found that out for yourself. :(

You also mention,that,there's "a bunch of stuff she wants to...

When I read your question,I have very real concerns!!

You are separating from your wife to be with her [and this girl has jumped from
One bad relationship to another]

You are,both,bringing...

Go with your heart,what it's saying to you!! :)



This is what you've to remember & what your heart is telling you. It's, of course,because you love her so much that,when you don't get to see...

Right again,Tal! Classic mistake of breaking the no contact rule.

... Like it should've been at the start i.e. NO CONTACT for ex's!!

Clearly this girl is "messing around" with you,big time :( One minute she's all
Friendly,the next you hear nothing from her!! ...

Sadly,even after all you did for this girl,you've lost her :(

... The reason being,she has chosen her ex rather than you :( The best thing that you can do,[whether it is a mistake on her part,or...

... and in so doing,he is REALLY annoyed at you for getting to the truth

That's where all this negative stuff is from!!

Tell the police,& let them deal with it [as soon as possible] He'll NOT...

... And,believe me,it will happen soon enough!!



Take one day at a time as,once it's in the past,you can't get it back :(
Also,all this work that you're doing around the house,is good...

Hey,"meecy12" that's a very positive remark to make :)

You're at a new [and very happy] phase just now,with this relationship
I'm sure that your positive outlook in life,will serve you well.
...

OK,so it's a big thing about "Caroline"

Could I suggest,that,you try out the smaller things in the way that "Romefalls19"
Suggested.

And,with the big stuff,like "Caroline" a counsellor would...

It really is SHOCKING to say that to anyone,and especially a friend such as
Yourself.

If you feel able to,meet up with her/telephone {either of these,it doesn't matter! }

What DOES matter,is...

That's the negative part.

Don't dwell on it,as by doing that,you're keeping his PAST in your relationship with him,which as you know,is starting to DESTROY what you both have together! :(

Now...

"emmagreggor" it's really good to know that you really like him,as this is a great place to start.

You mention,that,you think he is being a bit cautious. Perhaps,because he can tell that
You like...

By making small "gestures" you're showing her that you really DO care
About her. :)

Remember,and not be rude. Wait a while to see if she accepts your "gesture"
Before trying something else.

Yes,indeed. You need to reassure her that you are going to be a significant part of both of their lives [for however long that is going to take!! ]

That's the negative part :(... But it does get better. :)

You've now got a girlfriend to look after,as well as a baby & that should cause you
To grow up fast.

Why? To take up this...

NO surely,a healthy relationship is where BOTH people make the decisions,
And talk about it fully with each other.

... And in this relationship,NOT from your girlfriend's friend,who has proved,...

"mzmzguy" you got a second chance to see her & explain everything.

BUT this leaves me rather confused as I can't see why you would
Want to continue to see a girl who always turns to that other...

"babz888" what this guy said to you,really sums up the whole thing for me!!

"Ireland/Scotland"? No not really,you already know,in your heart of hearts,
That as this relationship is soooo long...

That's the very best thing you can do,and once achieved,will start the healing
Process

EXACTLY when you measure a relationship,by this "scale" [and it's a really
good one to go by] then if you have doubts,you will know if they are real...

... and you will be able to act upon them.

Time for NO CONTACT so that she is denied that power!!

The trouble with this girl,is that,she's very indecisive... so getting her to
Actually commit to a relationship is going to be very hard indeed



Also,this is something that you will have to...

Firstly,I have to say,he's a RAT not considering your feelings,and then
Leaving you for another girl.:(



As you say,in your question,he was just using you for sex



He's YOUR perfect...

The reason being,that,they really care about you & are committed to the relationship :)

... This kind of behaviour will tear you apart,NOT bring you closer together!!

The big difference,being,that YOU are taking responsibility for YOUR actions.
And when that happens,and only then will life start to improve for you.