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  1. There are a few things you can do, to try to set...

    There are a few things you can do, to try to set boundaries (yes, even at your age).

    Learning to communicate effectively, and honestly, will go a long way toward trust- and if you and your...
  2. I find it extremely upsetting, this whole mess...

    I find it extremely upsetting, this whole mess you have found yourself in.

    I won't spend much time on your question, because I'm not sure you are intelligent enough to make a good decision for...
  3. Answers
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    471

    I am presuming that your discharge from the...

    I am presuming that your discharge from the hospital, included some sort of plan. For example, medication, support, phone numbers, etc.

    I don't know why you would try to diagnose yourself, with a...
  4. I would be hurt. Most obituaries include adult...

    I would be hurt.

    Most obituaries include adult children as John, and wife, Stella, and mentioning any other married children, with their spouses. Then the grandchildren, I presume, by the oldest...
  5. Answers
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    644

    First of all, no one here is qualified to...

    First of all, no one here is qualified to diagnose you with any illness, mental or otherwise.

    Because of the situation you are in NOW, I can't urge you enough to copy your 'post/question', and get...
  6. You are a survivor, and please accept a pat on...

    You are a survivor, and please accept a pat on the back and a big virtual hug from me!

    You may think you don't have strength, but you have the power and instinct of a mountain lion, which you...
  7. Question: Dreams

    by Jake2008
    Answers
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    724

    Perhaps his conscience is acting up. It's not...

    Perhaps his conscience is acting up.

    It's not impossible that he may have had encounters with 'faceless' women (that meant nothing other than a roll in the hay), before his commitment to you.
    ...
  8. If you choose to go the route to a divorce, then...

    If you choose to go the route to a divorce, then by all means do so, but realize that it is not your husband that is invading your privacy, or deleting your friends on FB, or who has extreme jealousy...
  9. Answers
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    527

    You have only known her through email, and...

    You have only known her through email, and because this is the first time actually meeting her, I would not give gifts, to her, or her son.

    It is more likely than not, she wouldn't be giving a...
  10. Answers
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    512

    I disagree. I think by not inviting her, it will...

    I disagree. I think by not inviting her, it will create an uncomfortable rift with your family.

    If all she has done from what you've said, is throw out the odd barb, you should be able to just...
  11. I had a very similar situation, before I married...

    I had a very similar situation, before I married my husband. He too, didn't like that my best friend, male, lived just a few doors down.

    I told my boyfriend in no uncertain terms that I would...
  12. This isn't about him so much as it is about you,...

    This isn't about him so much as it is about you, and the decisions you make, and perhaps even hedging your bets, in case there is a chance that this man will choose you.

    You are either very young,...
  13. Answers
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    1,518

    It seems the adults involved have to learn how to...

    It seems the adults involved have to learn how to make a constructive, fair, and firm schedule for this kid.

    If one is afraid of the ex changing visitation etc, that is a lousy excuse to let this...
  14. Answers
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    642

    I agree with Alty. There are always two sides to...

    I agree with Alty. There are always two sides to every story.

    We have heard your side, so what can you see, about yourself, that might be motivating them to be so angry with you.
  15. I would tell your son, that nobody should be...

    I would tell your son, that nobody should be allowed to touch/look at/investigate his private parts, nor should he touch anybody elses'.

    If he is curious about body parts, get him a book, and read...
  16. Question: Toxic husband

    by Jake2008
    Answers
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    723

    As Tal said, toxic could mean anything. ...

    As Tal said, toxic could mean anything.

    Please provide more information.

    It is hard to offer advice otherwise.
  17. Answers
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    It is so easy to find fault with your husband,...

    It is so easy to find fault with your husband, until the reason becomes so clear.

    BUT, as it goes, you are attracted to a much younger man. Somehow this justifies you bashing your husband.

    I...
  18. Answers
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    883

    You say he is your husband, and then you say you...

    You say he is your husband, and then you say you hope to marry soon. Which is it?

    Hard to respond to your question when you start by being dishonest right off the bat.
  19. Answers
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    Has he prostituted you out before? You should...

    Has he prostituted you out before?

    You should find out what the deal was. Maybe it involves enough money to help get through Christmas.

    I hope you don't have children.
  20. Answers
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    Without actually seeing and hearing her say the...

    Without actually seeing and hearing her say the words that were in the text, how can you take that seriously as a 'maybe'.

    While she was texting, maybe she was rolling her eyes, and on her way to...
  21. Answers
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    381

    I think you are both messed up, equally. The...

    I think you are both messed up, equally.

    The relationship is only six months old, and always in the beginning of a relationship, you learn about each other, after the initial euphoria wears off.
    ...
  22. Answers
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    461

    You need legal advice for many reasons. ...

    You need legal advice for many reasons.

    Finding out how to go about protecting yourself, for example, assets, bank accounts, pensions, etc. is very important. Your husband likely knows, as most...
  23. Answers
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    393

    "Is this just his inherent personality or should...

    "Is this just his inherent personality or should I just break up with him?"


    Yes, and yes, in answer to your question. I assume you have not a lot of experience with dating and relationships,...
  24. Answers
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    3,698

    It is good that your mother is giving you good...

    It is good that your mother is giving you good advice.

    But, I don't think two wrongs make a right, meaning that him having an affair gives you the right to beat the hell out of him, and make him...
  25. Answers
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    I agree with Talaniman. The beginnings of any...

    I agree with Talaniman.

    The beginnings of any relationship, no matter how they come about, are just the very first steps in deciding whether a relationship is worth pursuing.

    I know of Indian...
  26. Answers
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    Views
    3,698

    I am sorry you are going through the aftermath of...

    I am sorry you are going through the aftermath of your husband's infidelity.

    Sad as well, that the woman he fooled into thinking he was single, was also duped.

    Worst of all, your children have...
  27. Question: Sweet 16

    by Jake2008
    Answers
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    770

    Maybe the bigger issue isn't the party, but the...

    Maybe the bigger issue isn't the party, but the fact that friends are not allowed in your home, and you are not allowed to go to their homes, so there would never be any birthday party celebrated,...
  28. Answers
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    Why do you and your husband have to move, if you...

    Why do you and your husband have to move, if you are only in a different city than your family? Why can't you make more frequent visits to see them, and help out when you can.

    Why does it have to...
  29. The most important part of you question, to me,...

    The most important part of you question, to me, is, you seem to know there is no future with this woman, you can clearly see that she has qualities and behaviours that you do not like (the dating...
  30. Answers
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    467

    I think you have pretty much identified what is...

    I think you have pretty much identified what is causing this stress. The thing about stress is, that those 'feelings' of stress, still manifest in different ways as you also have pointed out, even...
  31. Answers
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    256

    I look at this a bit differently. I think that...

    I look at this a bit differently.

    I think that there are no differences between 'quality' women, and 'quality' women with children. Consider that in today's world, blended families, where both...
  32. Did your husband and his ex, have any children...

    Did your husband and his ex, have any children together?

    That he thinks highly enough of his ex's family, to attend any funerals of their family members, is an honourable thing I think. He holds...
  33. Answers
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    442

    Sometimes, opposites attract. My husband and I...

    Sometimes, opposites attract. My husband and I were dubbed 'The Odd Couple', many years ago, and it has stuck. I am more like your boyfriend, and my husband would be more like you.

    Most of what...
  34. Question: Brother

    by Jake2008
    Answers
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    576

    Really? Suddenly, out of the blue, with no...

    Really?

    Suddenly, out of the blue, with no reason, your sister-in-law, (you refer to her as 'his wife') was being verbally abusive toward you, and you asked her to talk to you in a healthy manner....
  35. It is very hard to accept being betrayed by a...

    It is very hard to accept being betrayed by a friend.

    But, that is how you learn who your real friends are. It seems you had only those two, and to your standards, they have changed, and gone in...
  36. I agree with you in a way, that you had...

    I agree with you in a way, that you had opportunities with school, but never tried what was available to you.

    Many do learn about their own talent by joining activities.

    But you are not...
  37. Answers
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    What I was trying to get through to you was, only...

    What I was trying to get through to you was, only you can stop the nonsense.

    Make your own plans, with your own friends (minus the ex), with those you enjoy spending time with.

    It really is up...
  38. Good luck.

    Good luck.
  39. I think it is a matter of you growing up. You...

    I think it is a matter of you growing up.

    You and your ex are history, but that does not mean that your friends have to accept that because your ex is out of your life, and therefore theirs too.
    ...
  40. Answers
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    559

    While you have moved on with your life, without...

    While you have moved on with your life, without her, she has not moved on with her life, without you.

    Where she still has feelings for you, she will find a way to express them, and in negative...
  41. I'm going to assume that perhaps you were not...

    I'm going to assume that perhaps you were not aware of the affair for 20 years.

    I don't think we even had texting 20 years ago.

    It would be helpful if you offered a bit more detail, as to how...
  42. Perhaps it could be two things here. The first...

    Perhaps it could be two things here.

    The first being, that the prior relationship problems, and aftermath, have not yet been let go, or worked out. For that clearing the burden, with a counselor,...
  43. I think that when something happens, like an...

    I think that when something happens, like an accusation of sexual assault by a member of a family, toward another member of the family, the waters become muddied when everybody has an opinion on how...
  44. Answers
    6
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    754

    I am really sorry this has happened to you. To...

    I am really sorry this has happened to you.

    To save for such a long time, you and her step mom, and expect that she would be responsible, and then it turned into the opposite, is a bitter pill to...
  45. Answers
    4
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    396

    Love isn't what you say, love is what you do. ...

    Love isn't what you say, love is what you do.

    I hear all the time things like, 'love ya' or 'love' or even 'love you', but in all cases it is pretty obvious the 'love' is an endearment, or an...
  46. Answers
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    595

    You are facing a situation, many thousands of...

    You are facing a situation, many thousands of people face every day, and that is the ageing or demands of taking care of their parent, who needs care. Just a you described.

    As well, your mother...
  47. Question: Cheating

    by Jake2008
    Answers
    8
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    780

    There is nobody to blame, except the person who...

    There is nobody to blame, except the person who decided to disregard his vows, and have an affair.

    HE could have come to you and talked. HE could have realized that HIS decision could result in...
  48. Question: Aimless. Help?

    by Jake2008
    Answers
    4
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    558

    I assume that you are living at home with your...

    I assume that you are living at home with your parents, otherwise, the need to support yourself independently would outweigh any hesitation in at least attempting to find work in your field.

    Most...
  49. Answers
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    667

    She is not helping you with the struggle you are...

    She is not helping you with the struggle you are going through personally, she is only adding insult to injury.

    While you have identified your faults, and taken charge of your life to change,...
  50. Answers
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    1,195

    It really is a stupid little lie isn't it? She...

    It really is a stupid little lie isn't it? She would know that you would eventually see the receipts, and realize that she went out shopping for some time to herself, but she probably just hoped to...
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