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Type: Posts; User: BetrayalBtCamp

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  1. Answers
    13
    Views
    1,236

    The bigger issue is why you felt a need to lie...

    The bigger issue is why you felt a need to lie about it. You could have said "That's for me to know!" & diverted the conversation instead of being untruthful.

    Do you not feel safe or comfortable...
  2. Answers
    18
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    20,573

    Based on his behavior with his clothes on, it...

    Based on his behavior with his clothes on, it sounds like he does love you but he has a default sexual mentality that isn't working for you, which is to get his & get done. You've tried talking to...
  3. Answers
    21
    Views
    10,056

    People get raped all the time, some are virgins &...

    People get raped all the time, some are virgins & some are not. The fact they are not virgins doesn't make the act of their bodies being assaulted any less of an ordeal for them, whether teens or...
  4. He had the choice of having an adult discussion...

    He had the choice of having an adult discussion about your concerns & instead chose to tell you to go away. If he's not going to fight for your relationship, not fight to raise your child together &...
  5. Answers
    98
    Views
    6,066

    Of course you can't any more than he can...

    Of course you can't any more than he can understand why the opposite is true for you. You are mature & loving enough to know what the true benefits of a mutually truly deep loving relationship are,...
  6. Answers
    98
    Views
    6,066

    That's not an unusual dynamic, but not a good one...

    That's not an unusual dynamic, but not a good one to have to deal with. And very hurtful for you obviously.

    So my questions to you is why are you willing to be there for him when it's causing...
  7. Answers
    50
    Views
    4,925

    It is a very tuff situation to be in, especially...

    It is a very tuff situation to be in, especially with such a long history & child to take into consideration.

    You are absolutely right that it is a 1 Cor 3 7:3-5 issue too. It's so sad when you...
  8. Answers
    50
    Views
    4,925

    He may not have physically cheated yet but he is...

    He may not have physically cheated yet but he is betraying himself, the marriage & you. Standing strong in your faith & for your marriage means you can not allow the contamination & damage being done...
  9. I'm sorry you are having to suffer through this. ...

    I'm sorry you are having to suffer through this.

    I'm not a bible scholar, but here are my thoughts. God doesn't forgive unless there is true repentance & a turning away from the sin, he won't...
  10. Answers
    21
    Views
    10,056

    I have known men who have struggled with this...

    I have known men who have struggled with this too, I'm glad he has you to be there for him. It can make a huge difference to him to know you are so supportive.
  11. Answers
    21
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    10,056

    You didn't know & obviously you didn't want to...

    You didn't know & obviously you didn't want to cause him any pain. It's just that his particular sexual abuse is so aligned with church it's like asking a rape victim to go back to the scene of the...
  12. Answers
    50
    Views
    4,925

    He is not going to admit he's cheating, even if...

    He is not going to admit he's cheating, even if he is. Whether that is going on, there are significant issues that need to be addressed before the marriage can be a good one for both of you. You will...
  13. Answers
    11
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    13,110

    It sounds at least partly a Love Languages issue...

    It sounds at least partly a Love Languages issue to me.

    Amazon.com: The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate: Gary Chapman: Books

    This is from a Gary Chapman...
  14. Answers
    21
    Views
    3,461

    The sort of issues he has can not be handled only...

    The sort of issues he has can not be handled only by reading a book. That would be helpful in conjunction with professional help, not by itself.

    And it must not have worked well for him since...
  15. Answers
    98
    Views
    6,066

    He doesn't give much of himself in relationships...

    He doesn't give much of himself in relationships but selfishly takes all he can get.

    What he learned from you was not to be a better partner but how to fake it better. So now instead of having...
  16. Answers
    21
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    3,461

    Do you realize how which damage shaking a baby...

    Do you realize how which damage shaking a baby can cause, permanent damage? I'm sorry you have to face this, but your baby needs to be protected from the father & you have to be the one to do that....
  17. Answers
    35
    Views
    2,756

    Your real problem isn't where your D is going to...

    Your real problem isn't where your D is going to be living & how she will be raised. Your real problem is that your girlfriend is asking something totally unreasonable of you & refuses to consider...
  18. Answers
    9
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    1,201

    Umm, no you don't have to live with that. It's...

    Umm, no you don't have to live with that. It's emotional / verbal abuse & it's not good for either of you to have it happen regularly. It's an extremely bad habit she's gotten into & like any habit...
  19. Answers
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    635

    Sending the pix to the married man's wife would...

    Sending the pix to the married man's wife would be a better choice. She should know of this hobby of his...
  20. Answers
    3
    Views
    6,281

    Sorry you are dealing with this, it's a horrible...

    Sorry you are dealing with this, it's a horrible situation to have to face. Right now you are hearing what she told herself to make it OK to cheat. Of course you have every right to be angry you were...
  21. It sounds like you need to work on your...

    It sounds like you need to work on your boundaries. You don't owe someone that you knew a long time ago & barely have gotten reacquainted with details of your personal life much less your sexual...
  22. Answers
    2
    Views
    540

    If you do not have legal child support...

    If you do not have legal child support established thru the ct yet, you need to do that ASAP. In many places, the one that files for CS first has a huge advantage that should be given to your kids....
  23. Answers
    21
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    10,056

    The fact that he could tell you about it says a...

    The fact that he could tell you about it says a lot about the amt of trust he feels for you. It will be good for him to be able to talk it out, that's a giant step towards healing which is a slow...
  24. Just like friends don't let friends drive drunk,...

    Just like friends don't let friends drive drunk, pointing out to them when they are self sabotaging & indulging in delusional thinking is something a good friend does. You can't make them change...
  25. Answers
    13
    Views
    1,347

    How old is he? How much time is this self...

    How old is he? How much time is this self entertainment taking, is it interfering with other things he should be doing? How's your sex life with him?
  26. Answers
    21
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    10,056

    I'm very sorry to learn he has had such a...

    I'm very sorry to learn he has had such a horrible thing happen. It does happen more often than most realize particularly with boys. It's a double blow for them since not only was their trust &...
  27. Answers
    35
    Views
    2,756

    It is a horrible situation to be in & obviously...

    It is a horrible situation to be in & obviously we want the best for you & your children. This is not something that can be easily solved or that you can handle on your own, professional help would...
  28. Answers
    35
    Views
    2,756

    It doesn't look good, that's for sure. I...

    It doesn't look good, that's for sure.

    I don't mean to kick you while you're down, but taking the time to figure out how to pick a good partner as well as being one would be something you should...
  29. Answers
    35
    Views
    2,756

    Her mother does sound like part of the problem. ...

    Her mother does sound like part of the problem.

    I'm sorry you are dealing with this...
  30. Answers
    35
    Views
    2,756

    If you give in to emotional blackmail concerning...

    If you give in to emotional blackmail concerning your young D, the nitemares with this woman will only just have started & the price will always be very high.

    Your D needs you & can't take care...
  31. Answers
    7
    Views
    1,979

    JB stated the best advice perfectly. This is not...

    JB stated the best advice perfectly. This is not a guy that takes hints or is sensitive to your situation or feelings, so subtle will not work with him. You will have to be very precise & stick to...
  32. Just tell her right away you're looking forward...

    Just tell her right away you're looking forward to a friendship but are not interested in any relationships right now because you have too much on your plate for one & want to be clear about that...
  33. Answers
    7
    Views
    1,979

    You are going to have to stick to your boundaries...

    You are going to have to stick to your boundaries & he's not respecting them. If he can't do that now, when your relationship is so new, he's likely to get even worse at it later.

    He has issues...
  34. Answers
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    435

    I wouldn't take what he said about the kids...

    I wouldn't take what he said about the kids wouldn't take anyone less for a mother at face value, that may just have been his malespeak for a compliment to you. He's obviously had custody of 4 kids...
  35. Answers
    7
    Views
    527

    Oh, that was a terrible thing to say. If it's an...

    Oh, that was a terrible thing to say. If it's an isolated incident, then obviously it was something that isn't normal behavior for you. If it's not, then you need to address those issues before...
  36. Answers
    17
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    1,991

    I fixed my prior post so it made it more clear. I...

    I fixed my prior post so it made it more clear. I didn't think you worked for him but obviously you did go through a lot of stress because of that situation. Now this breakup is just adding more...
  37. Answers
    17
    Views
    1,991

    You are in such a horrible place with what's...

    You are in such a horrible place with what's going on with your job causing you to be unemployed & basically having him fire you from being his girlfriend too. No wonder you are so upset & hurt!
    ...
  38. Answers
    7
    Views
    527

    First, what is she referring to that she's trying...

    First, what is she referring to that she's trying to "forgive & forget"?

    Second, why would you think "F you" is a signal to contact her again?

    Third, why are you still trying to chase someone...
  39. Answers
    28
    Views
    2,634

    For one thing, we'd like an adult answer to does...

    For one thing, we'd like an adult answer to does the new girlfriend know about the preexisting one?
  40. Answers
    17
    Views
    1,991

    Sounds like he's lost his way & thinks the grass...

    Sounds like he's lost his way & thinks the grass is greener on the other side because he can't see all the manure there yet. He may think he wants someone that doesn't know of his humble beginnings &...
  41. Answers
    6
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    822

    He's trying to tell you all men act like he does,...

    He's trying to tell you all men act like he does, which isn't true. Some men are going to date with one eye out for other possibilities they may want a shot with (which sounds like he's doing) while...
  42. Wanting sex with other people is the real reason...

    Wanting sex with other people is the real reason he wants to end things with you, the others on the list is how he's justifying the break up with you & just excuses, not the true reason.

    Does he...
  43. Answers
    17
    Views
    1,991

    It's not an affair if he's single again, which...

    It's not an affair if he's single again, which breaking up with you & putting all your pix away indicates is what he's done, regain his single status.

    For him to end it so abruptly after taking...
  44. Answers
    28
    Views
    2,634

    Not a surprising response from you. Being...

    Not a surprising response from you. Being childish instead of handling relationships in a responsible, LOVING, HONEST way is why you are in the position you are in.

    Pouting at the responses...
  45. Answers
    9
    Views
    490

    This guy is not a good bet for any relationship...

    This guy is not a good bet for any relationship married or not. Save yourself & your life from any more hell by getting yourself in a better place that doesn't include any lunacy.

    As to the...
  46. Answers
    28
    Views
    2,634

    Tell your orig'l girlfriend the truth. Since you...

    Tell your orig'l girlfriend the truth. Since you are not equipped or willing to put in the necessary effort to maintain a true committed relationship, it's unlikely you will be able to properly...
  47. You obviously have been through a lot, it's so...

    You obviously have been through a lot, it's so hard to lose a loving parent & cancer is a terrible disease to see a loved one suffer with. It's certainly understandable that would have contributed to...
  48. Talk to the owner & explain that you're having...

    Talk to the owner & explain that you're having problems with the sales guy. In the long run, that sales guy is a major liability to the owner. Even if he can't be sued because things didn't get put...
  49. Answers
    3
    Views
    540

    Yes, you are expecting too much of him because...

    Yes, you are expecting too much of him because apparently he's not willing to give you a solid basis for a good HONEST relationship that doesn't involve you coming in second best to his getting high....
  50. He is very young & apparently very immature. He...

    He is very young & apparently very immature. He may be a better partner some time in the future, maybe not but for now he sure isn't.

    You can do much better even if by yourself than to have to...
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