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    paraclete's Avatar
    paraclete Posts: 2,706, Reputation: 173
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    #21

    Dec 16, 2012, 10:09 PM
    The Biblical injunction spare the rod and spoil the child is not well understood, a proper study would demonstrate the rod spoken of is the mouth, that is chastising the child, disciplining the child and giving it proper instruction. The Bible says that he who does not discipline his child hates him and this is the Christian standard, not thrashing the child.
    dontknownuthin's Avatar
    dontknownuthin Posts: 2,910, Reputation: 751
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    #22

    Dec 16, 2012, 10:30 PM
    Violence begets violence. If you want a violent child, treat him violently. If you want a peaceful child, treat him peacefully.

    It is just as effective to use non-violent measures to teach children to behave and you do not, as a teacher, risk upsetting parents or setting a bad example for the children as you will if you use corporal punishment.
    paraclete's Avatar
    paraclete Posts: 2,706, Reputation: 173
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    #23

    Dec 28, 2012, 12:51 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    As I said earlier in this thread. "Spare the rod and spoil the child" is NOT found in the Bible.
    Well you may be right on the letter of the word but the concept is certainly found in the Bible
    Proverbs 13:24
    Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.

    The rod spoken of the voice, when that doesn't work harsher measures are sometimes necessary, boundries must be set and children taught to respect them
    dontknownuthin's Avatar
    dontknownuthin Posts: 2,910, Reputation: 751
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    #24

    Dec 28, 2012, 04:02 PM
    Of course, in ancient times it was common to use leaches to treat illness and other forms of bloodletting, and practices like crucifixion and other painful means of implementing death sentences such as beheadings were commonly done, so I think we've evolved a bit.

    The difficulty with hitting children as a means of punishment - or spanking or swatting or whatever more palatable terms people want to use for it - is that it's generally considered a "last resort". When parents are at the point of implementing the "last resort" few are patient, kind or reasonable any longer - lets face it, kids drive us nuts. The potential to go too far is great.

    All kids are different but I have a child who was from a difficult background (adopted) who has ADHD. I found it most effective to implement natural consequences. If he broke a toy in a tantrum, there was no way I was going to fix it or replace it - it went in the trash "Oh, well - I guess you broke that when you had your temper tantrum so it's garbage now. That's too bad because you really liked that toy. Next time maybe you can use your words and not throw things." If natural consequences aren't appropriate, I would come up with something as reasonably close as I could. For example, if he spoiled an event that we went to as a family, we would not permit him to go to an event that was for his enjoyment. That is, ruin the family dinner today and you cannot go to the birthday party tomorrow: "wow - this is a shame. Your behavior was really bad today and children who behave that way aren't allowed at birthday parties. Well, hopefully you'll behave better in the future so you don't have to miss fun events."

    I could have spanked my child at the family dinner and then let him go to the birthday, but he would have just remembered that I hit him. With this alternate approach, he learned that if he wanted to do what he wanted to do, he better not spoil what the rest of the family wanted to do. We repeated the lesson a few times - left restauratns with our food packed to go when he acted up, then he was not allowed to go anywhere with us for a few days and he had to stay home with the boring parent, with nothing entertaining to do. He got the message and learned it was in his best interests to behave.

    I don't know what hitting my child would have ever accomplished but I didn't try it. He's now 18, fit, healthy and happy with a lot of friends. He is well liked by the adults in his life, headed for college on a full scholarship with recommendations from the places where he volunteered through high school and is disciplined and accomplished in his sport. We are very close. The proof is in the pudding.
    Enigma1999's Avatar
    Enigma1999 Posts: 2,223, Reputation: 1077
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    #25

    Dec 28, 2012, 04:28 PM
    Let me put it to you this way... if YOU spanked my child... they would find your body at the bottom of a landfill.

    I remember once when I was in high school. I was being "naughty" and a male teacher said that I had either the option of being spanked or cleaning the cafeteria. I turned to him and said," let me do YOU the favor of cleaning the cafeteria, because if my father catches wind of you wanting to hit me, he will see to it that you are at the bottom of the lake with cement boots." He looked at me and said that perhaps I should clean the cafeteria.

    My father is old school Italian, and his and the apple doesn't fall very far from the tree...

    So, yes, you hit my child and you will pay...
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #26

    Dec 28, 2012, 04:45 PM
    The Greek noun for “discipline” means “upbringing," "training," instruction.” The Bible says that this shows parental love. (Proverbs 13:24) The “rod of discipline” should never be abusive—emotionally or physically. (Proverbs 22:15; 29:15) Discipline that is rigid or harsh with no love is an abuse of parental authority and can crush a child's spirit. (Colossians 3:21) Balanced discipline properly administered gives children the message that their parents love them and care about the kind of person they are becoming.

    The Bible says, “Don't overcorrect your children or you will take all the heart out of them.” (Colossians 3:21) It also says that physical punishment is usually not the most effective teaching method. Proverbs 17:10: “A rebuke works deeper in one having understanding than striking a stupid one a hundred times.”
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #27

    Dec 28, 2012, 10:30 PM
    I've noticed that there's a lot of talk about the bible in this thread. I want to point out that the OP of this thread isn't Christian, that's very clear by how and what he writes. So maybe quoting the bible isn't something that's called for in this thread.

    Just a thought.
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #28

    Dec 28, 2012, 10:33 PM
    I've noticed that there's a lot of talk about the bible in this thread. I want to point out that the OP of this thread isn't Christian, that's very clear by how and what he writes. So maybe quoting the bible isn't something that's called for in this thread.

    Just a thought.
    I agree. It appears the OP is Muslum, so quoting the Qur'an would be more appropriate.
    Enigma1999's Avatar
    Enigma1999 Posts: 2,223, Reputation: 1077
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    #29

    Dec 28, 2012, 10:41 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by J_9 View Post
    I agree. It appears the OP is Muslum, so quoting the Qur'an would be more appropriate.
    Agreed!
    caringnandu's Avatar
    caringnandu Posts: 21, Reputation: 2
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    #30

    Jan 31, 2013, 02:33 PM
    Depends upon relations between child and teacher...
    When I was I high school I was addicted to beating from my favourite sir... that sir was like my friend... I Used to tease him and he in return beat me... but.. id liked.. it... now I miss those days...
    I'm going to b 18 soon still like doing mischief and getting beating... from teachers that understands students
    I would hate beating from a very serious or professional teachers...
    dontknownuthin's Avatar
    dontknownuthin Posts: 2,910, Reputation: 751
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    #31

    Jan 31, 2013, 05:07 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by caringnandu View Post
    Depends upon relations between child and teacher.........
    When i was i highschool i was addicted to beating from my favourite sir......that sir was like my frnd......i Used to tease him and he in return beat me....but..id liked..it....now i miss those days......
    I m going to b 18 soon still like doing mischief and getting beating.......from teachers that understands students
    i would hate beating from a very serious or professional teachers......
    I can assure you, most people are not addicted to being beaten, do not like it and do not miss it when it ends. This sounds very concerning - like grooming for sexual abuse. Certainly, your odd experience with having a peer-like relationship with a teacher who you liked to be beaten by does not apply to the question.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #32

    Jan 31, 2013, 10:48 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by caringnandu View Post
    Depends upon relations between child and teacher.........
    When i was i highschool i was addicted to beating from my favourite sir......that sir was like my frnd......i Used to tease him and he in return beat me....but..id liked..it....now i miss those days......
    I m going to b 18 soon still like doing mischief and getting beating.......from teachers that understands students
    i would hate beating from a very serious or professional teachers......
    You like being abused?

    That's an issue you should have checked, and get resolution for it. Therapy would be a very good idea for you.

    Bottom line, corporal punishment is not legal in most places.

    I have to agree with Enigma. If a teacher, or anyone, beat my child, they'd find that teachers body in a landfill. You don't dare lay a hand on my children.
    Silver Lining's Avatar
    Silver Lining Posts: 374, Reputation: 36
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    #33

    Feb 1, 2013, 03:52 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by caringnandu View Post
    Depends upon relations between child and teacher.........
    When i was i highschool i was addicted to beating from my favourite sir......that sir was like my frnd......i Used to tease him and he in return beat me....but..id liked..it....now i miss those days......
    I m going to b 18 soon still like doing mischief and getting beating.......from teachers that understands students
    i would hate beating from a very serious or professional teachers......
    Are you seriously crazy to be addicted to beating? I was addicted to pranks but regretted being beaten up...
    Even I was hit as a child for being naughty,, but that doesn't mean the teacher is a fren,, the teacher is simply taking the anger out in the wrong way,, if someone hits my baby, they'l open the eyes in an ICU, not knowing what hit them...

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