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    clay88's Avatar
    clay88 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jul 21, 2008, 11:32 AM
    Why do women take advantage of me all the time?
    My name is Clay and I am 19 I've never been on a relationship with anyone. I don't know if most of the women read that about guys, but they always take advantage of me on certain things. There was a girl I really liked and she needed help in one of her classes and I am a real busy person I don't have time to do almost anything. What I really did is help her, so that she does not fail that class from all the time she was cutting that class. After getting her to have a n -A in her class grade as finals I asked her out but she really turned me down after that she did not want to talk to me. There was another girl I just met and the first day I met her she asked me if I can lend her 5 dollars, and she kept insisting. That kind of girl looks like an easy type and very open and talkative that in the first night we met at school we were in the subway she said she was tired and laid her head down between my two laps. (JUST SO THAT IT DOESN'T SOUND OFFENSIVE) and I was like you got to be f***ing kidding me. Since she kept insisting for the money which she was rubbing up on me in a sexual way I did not want to sound like a jerk but since she was seducing me all of the time I asked her what would you do to me if I give you the 5 dollars, she then paused and was very arrogant with me and said that she is not having sex. I gave her the 5 dollars cause I did not know what to do and I was afraid of saying no. I want to take a stand for myself and stop being that sucker guy that I've always been.
    JBeaucaire's Avatar
    JBeaucaire Posts: 5,426, Reputation: 997
    Software Expert
     
    #2

    Jul 21, 2008, 05:18 PM
    $5 for a lap rub... good deal!

    Girls aren't taking advantage of you. You are nice and others benefit from that. It's a reflection of your good character.

    If someone asks you for something and you give it to them, you have completed a transaction. Nothing more is promised or required. You're a natural giver and many people are natural users. Neither of you is particularly better or worse than the other, you are both just being yourselves.

    Meanwhile, stop carrying cash.
    Ash123's Avatar
    Ash123 Posts: 1,793, Reputation: 305
    Ultra Member
     
    #3

    Jul 21, 2008, 07:16 PM
    Doing random favors for people is not a dating strategy or even a romance strategy.

    My advice: help because you want to - not because you want something for it.

    If you are having trouble figuring out who to ask out, it's the girls that smile and touch you on the arm and ask if you have a girlfriend or if you are busy this weekend. Ask them out... don't be a loner. Meet girls with your friends to show them you have a life. OK, go get them.

    It's good to be nice but don't be a walk-thru smiling tutor and cash machine...
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #4

    Jul 21, 2008, 07:28 PM
    Why do women take advantage of me all the time?

    You have yourself to blame for that, as why expect a date for a school grade, that's pathetic, and if you had said no, she would not have felt you up like a rookie. Come on, share some blame here, and drop those lowdown ways, and learn the value of saying no, and meaning it.

    If you want a date, there are a lot better ways of going about it.
    hjpan's Avatar
    hjpan Posts: 902, Reputation: 29
    Senior Member
     
    #5

    Jul 21, 2008, 07:34 PM
    It's not all your fault. You seem like a guy with low self-esteem.... the best way is to force yourself to talk to people. Everyday, I try to meet new people regardless of age, gender, or race by striking a conversation around.

    The biggest boost in my self-esteem was when I went for a 4-day Marine Corps training program.

    It's not for everyone though
    starbuck8's Avatar
    starbuck8 Posts: 3,128, Reputation: 734
    Gone, But Not Forgotten
     
    #6

    Jul 21, 2008, 07:50 PM
    Young girls will totally take advantage of boys like you because they KNOW they can! You need to learn to stand up for yourself, and require more of the girls you spend time with. If they ask for something up front, say in a polite way, I'm sorry, but go ask someone else. This is how you gain respect from girls and people in general. If you are going to let people walk all over you... they will!
    hjpan's Avatar
    hjpan Posts: 902, Reputation: 29
    Senior Member
     
    #7

    Jul 21, 2008, 08:00 PM
    I totally agree with starbuck8

    You need to learn how to control yourself, not letting others step over you.
    I used to be stepped on like a damn door-mat. Girls played with my heart and feelings... I almost gave up dating but I dated my girlfriend (now ex) for a year and four months. Besides that, you need to learn how to say "no" in a polite way.

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