My child with my ex is 13. I have remarried and have 3 other children that my 13yr old babysits for occasionally. I returned to work part-time. Usually it is for 1-2 hrs but one day it eneded up being 4 hrs. My ex threatened to call the police and said it is illegal to have a 13 responsible for other children. I need to be free of this man's threats to take custody away from me and have been dealing with this for 13 yrs. Can someone please tell me what the law is, so I can be clear and take a course of action. Thank you. I live in NH

Most States do not have regulations or laws about when a child is considered old enough to care for him/herself or to care for other children.States may have guidelines or recommendations. These guidelines are most often distributed through child protective services and are administered at the county level.
Contact the National Clearinghouse (NCCAN) at 800-394-3366, and staff there will refer you to your local child protective services agency to learn about age guidelines in your area.

Hope that helps also please look at http://nccic.acf.hhs.gov/poptopics/homealone.htmlthere is some good info there. Hope you manage to get the problem sorted with your Ex.

Thank you this is the information I have needed! I love the quote and I have been implementing this in my life recently so it is very profound to me! Again thnak you

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"You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience by which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to
yourself, 'I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along."

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Thank you I'm pleased that I could help you! This is a good forum and I'm sure you will enjoy spending time here.

If you like what members say or don't like it, you can click on the right hand corner top of post(s) & "Comment on this post" and leave member feed back.

Good luck with sorting things out.

Hi, Marc,
Welcome to this site; it's a lot of fun, with a lot of good information.
Nwsflash's answer is very good.
I would like to add that a child can babysit at any age... Of course, I'm sure you know that means the child knows what to do or call in case of an emergency. At 13, I see no reason why your child can't babysit!
I am 64 yrs old, and have 3 children (all grown and moved away now), and they did the same thing when they were young.
You ex seems to be giving you a lot of trouble, for no reason. There are some like that! My first marriage ended in divorce after 7 yrs, and this is my second, to a wonderful woman, now going on 29 years. Her ex-husband was one of those!
Fortunately, we moved 400 miles away from him!
That solved all the idiotic problems he kept coming up with, with her 6 yr old daughter, my step-daughter. Because of him, the daughter is now 36 yrs old, and looks at me like her own "father". She is respectful of her real father, on the phone, but only wants to see him maybe once a year, just out of respect.
Hang in there, and hopefully, eventually your ex will realize that a fool acts like that! I do wish you best.

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Originally Posted by marc greenhalgh

My child with my ex is 13. I have remarried and have 3 other children that my 13yr old babysits for occasionally. I returned to work part-time. Usually it is for 1-2 hrs but one day it eneded up being 4 hrs. My ex threatened to call the police and said it is illegal to have a 13 responsible for other children. I need to be free of this man's threats to take custody away from me and have been dealing with this for 13 yrs. Can someone please tell me what the law is, so I can be clear and take a course of action. Thank you. I live in NH

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First most likely until the kids are grown you will not be away from his threats, if it is not this issue there will be something else. He sounds like many men or women I deal with often that want and try to use the children to control the other spouse after they are divorced.

As for as the child issue, Iwould check with the local social welfare department, Here it would be the Department of Children and Family services ( they are the ones that investigate child issues not the police at least locally here)

He will most likely look for reasons to "push your buttons" the rest of your life if he can. This is just something he found to use.

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Originally Posted by marc greenhalgh

My child with my ex is 13. I have remarried and have 3 other children that my 13yr old babysits for occasionally. I returned to work part-time. Usually it is for 1-2 hrs but one day it eneded up being 4 hrs. My ex threatened to call the police and said it is illegal to have a 13 responsible for other children. I need to be free of this man's threats to take custody away from me and have been dealing with this for 13 yrs. Can someone please tell me what the law is, so I can be clear and take a course of action. Thank you. I live in NH

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What I think you shoud do is talk to a judge or something because I think when she is at your house then you are the one in charge of her not him! I also think that you might be able to sit down and tolk to him on the phone and try to work something out! And if that doesn't work then I guess you can talk to me again. I will try to come up with more answers to all of your questions!



Sincerally,
Shelby♥

I think you should be at least 12.:)

The laws are so varied, if there was an accident, the child baby sitter would not be culpable but the parents would be. Conmon sense shoould prevail. For short periods i.e. 2_3 hours is OK for someone at the age of 12 especially girls however, 16 should be recognized as a legal age. In France it is law and the province of Quebec, I have had the same issue as a father, my 2 boys 7, and 11 being baby sat at night by a 13 yr old, the 13 yr old was bored and decided to go out and play at 10.30 at night with my 7 yr old. We live in Ontario. The law says 12 yrs old can. I intend to have it changed to 16. The world has changed. Our children must be protected. I would say 16 with a certificate would be good, common sense should dictate

My Daughter who lives with us leaves my 11 yr old grand daughter at home to care for a 2yr old .a 3 yr old and a 5 yr old . This drives me crazy and I feel that if I leave and knowing this that heaven forbid if anything happened because the 3 yr old has ADHD and the 2 yr old gets into everything,that I would be responsible and that if something did happen my poor grand daughter would have to live with it.When I say how I feel my daughter will yell at me or my wife ,my daughter has a drug problem and has to go to a clinic every morning for a dose of meth.We don't know what to do .We took custody of the 2 older kids from her husband and then she had 3 children with another man who now is serving 25 yrs for drug trafficking.My daughter is trying to get him out and I know they will go back to it ,but this is not about her and him its about the 3 younger ones and the way she thinks .She has told me she would have me killed ,but I am more afraid of her doing something to her mother.Can anything be done about her leaving the younger children with the 11 yr old ?

I called the local courts, juvenile courts, police station, and child protective services, in my state to ask the same ques. The reason, was is because, I was looking for a nanny, so I placed an ad in the paper, and a lot of teens, the same age as my daughter kept calling for t he position. So upon asking all the agencies,, they said the same thing the 64 yr. old said, that child is able to baby sit and there is really no legal limit, however, if the father can prove that the child is incompetent, then it may cause a problem for you, I even went as far to ask how many kids can my teen keep at one time, and I was informed that there is really no legal number... If you are confident, raised and trained your child to do this, and if your child is mature enough, it is all good... However if something happens to the younger children or your teen, while you are not there, you still will be held liable and can be charged with negligence...

I think when your parents tell you the right your suropose to be to become a babysitter I am 13 and I am a babysitter baecause my parents let me do babysitting so when ever your parents tell you which would be the right age :)

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Originally Posted by rightanswer

i think when your parents tell you the right your suropose to be to become a babysitter i am 13 and i am a babysitter baecause my parents let me do babysitting so when ever your parents tell you which would be the right age :)

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This is a legal board and you have posted very bad "legal" advice.

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Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

This is a legal board and you have posted very bad "legal" advice.

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It's not that bad, especially for a 13-year old.

But it is a circularity. The next question would be: how do the parents know "which age is right?". And the answer of course is they will know by considering the child's maturity and all other circumstances. But, as previously indicated, there is no "legal" rule in most places.

Okay, first of all, thanks for your information, I'm 12 so, I'm getting there. Then the other thing, you EX.if a man is threatening you to keep a safe watch over a child, then let him, the law of Manchester NH is that a child of any age can stay at home alone, and also babysit, and it also depends on how responsible the child is. Doing chores, picking up after them self, etc. Stuff like that shows how responsible somebody is. And if your EX is still making empty threats, then you can sue, because of harassment, and maybe any other problems that might have been caused over this. And remember, don't let that EX ruin your life, if he wants to act like a wild monkey, then fine, you can sue, he will lose the case, and he will stop making empty threats, and if he doesn't then you can sue again, and again and again, until the man gets it. But, custody is a huge thing, if you do not have full custody of the children, then he can get to see the every week or so over the weekends.

Could you post that Manchester, NH law? I cannot find it.