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-   -   Odd situation. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=103058)

  • Jun 21, 2007, 12:50 AM
    D-luvs
    Odd situation.
    Ok well this is an odd situation. My boyfriend let me use his eBay account to order some stuff. Well in his eBay info I saw that he'd ordered very big dildos about a month ago. I never saw them or knew about them. But being nosey (it kind of spiked my curiosity) I looked around the house a bit (I've just moved in w/ him). So yeah I found them wrapped up in a shirt under the bathroom sink. We keep our sex toys in a drawer so he was obviously trying to hide them. Now one def. looks used. It had what looks like dried up c*m in the creases. Sooo I don't know what to think. If he ordered them a month ago, then that had to have been used on someone else. Or used them himself anally... but I've never had anal... so I don't know... does anal leave white flakeyness behind? I would definitely prefer the second option, rather them him cheating, but it'd still be weird since he never mentioned being into that sort of thing. I want to ask him, but there's no way of not coming off like I'm accusing him... can anyone help??

    P.S. I know these dildo's aren't for me, their like huge... am I'm not. I also found orders for but plugs etc, but didn't find those.
  • Jun 21, 2007, 01:34 AM
    Clough
    Sounds like you really need to have a serious heart-to-heart with your boyfriend. I would suggest being straight-up with him and asking him about the things that you found. Since you already share so many things with him, there should be no harm in you being that forward concerning the inquiry to him.

    Don't be afraid. Just ask him. What do you have to lose? If he has been cheating on you or has another part about himself that he has not been telling you about, then you need to know. It's best not to keep any secrets if you want to have a serious relationship.

    You can do it. I know that you can. I believe in you.
  • Jun 21, 2007, 01:43 AM
    curlybenswife
    Just say you were putting something away noticed the t shirt and pulled it and out they fell so you washed the t shirt and now you would like to know where they have come from and why they were hidden.
    A reletionship shouldn't be based on lies it might be a quite simple reason he has them or it may well be one you just don't want to hear but there's only one way your going to find out isn't there and that's ask him no point in shying away from it, its going to bug you until you do.
    Good luck honesty is the best policy xx
  • Jun 21, 2007, 02:45 AM
    Squiffy
    Ask him, but be sensitive about it. Maybe he does use them himself and might be embarrassed about it, let him know you won't be embarrassed, just curious! If he is cheating, it is best you find out. A good relationship is an honest one, so ask him, but keep the situaiton light.
  • Jun 21, 2007, 05:01 AM
    smoothy
    Maybe he was afraid you might not share his enthusiasm for them. If you aren't offended ask him if you can use them on him, you found them by accident and was wondering if maybe that's what he would like, don't be upset or he will get defensive. Maybe that's what he really would like. It would be something else you can share in bed. It scratches what itches him and it might give you something you might find enjoyable prior to doing you own thing together.
  • Jun 21, 2007, 10:01 PM
    nya
    I really think you need to ask him because your health could be at stake. What if he is involved with other guys. This is very suspicious activity on his behalf. If you suspect another girl, then he could be exposing you if he sex practices aren't safe. You said you would prefer it if he were using the dildos on himself but does that mean he wants this done by a man if he had the opportunity? I would risk making him feel uncomfortable if it means I would be saving my own life. Good luck.
  • Jun 22, 2007, 04:36 AM
    smoothy
    I can't see why he would be dealing with dildos if he was into guys. Like I said, maybe he enjoys it, but is straight and for whatever reason feared you might not share his enjoyment.

    Best to just ask, be friendly, non-accusatory and if you don't put him on a defensive position maybe you will get to enjoy doing him with them. Which may be all he would like anyway. And something you might enjoy doing. Just don't start prejudging him on this.

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