I have said this before and will keep saying this as if it helps one woman keep her children and get out, maybe I will do some good.
I was married to an abusive man. He was charged with abuse, unlawful confinement, uttering death threats, breaking restraining orders and that is only the ones I reported. I fell for the I am sorry and it was my fault I made him do it. It was my fault for looking out the car windows when men walked by as I was signalling to them a phone number to contact me at, it was my fault if supper was not ready, it was my fault if I was too tired to have sex, it was my fault if a toy was left on the floor, it was my fault I was ugly, it was my fault I was lazy, it was my fault it was my fault it was my fault... do you see a pattern?
END RESULT: I was stupid; I risked my children. I risked my life with them. You see I lost custody of them. In most areas being in an abusive marriage is grounds to lose your kids as they are being harmed emotionally. I was so emotionally messed up I had a breakdown.
Steps if you want to stay alive and keep your children are:
1. Get legal documents and clothes packed. Passports, birth certificates, marriage license
2. Call the police if he is abusing you
3. Call a local battered women's shelter to get out
4. Get counseling
5. Get legal custody of your children.
Please don't ruin your life like I did. The guilt will tear you up inside, believe me. GET OUT.
