Well I been on and off with my boyfriend for 7 years. I have always thought he was very manly. Until I met Charley his openly gay friend. He and Charley have known one another for about 10 plus years.There have been rumors from family members, friends, and the mother of his two kids that he and Charley have had sex.

I have asked him about it and he doesn't really get angry. He acts like he thinks it's funny. I try to convince to admit it but all he does is look mad and say it's not true. He says “I love p***y". I have also asked Charley and he doesn't answer. Or he hangs up on me over the phone or in person he will laugh as well. I don't know what to think our sex is great and everything and he seems pretty straight but he also has other gay friends who don't really talk to me but tolerate me.

I need help?

He might be, but I doubt he is. In this day and age staying in the closet is just... impractical.

Lots of guys have gay friends. Doesn't mean he's gay. If he says no, or laughs it off - and your sex life is great - what's your problem? Are you looking for reasons to get rid of him?

Sounds to me like he's just comfortable in his own, heterosexual, skin!

What help exactly do you need?
The way you write about this, I'm not surprised that the gay friends just tolerate you. Lighten up and start having some fun with them. If there's any stereotypes still around about gay men, it's that they know how to have more fun.

The fact that there are a lot of men on the down low is real cause for your concern especially if family members have talked about it. There are men who are on the downlow and have good sex with their women, then their women end up with AIDS or some other STD.
I hope he is being honest. I'm sure he would question you if you had lesbian friends and he was hearing things from your family and were hanging out with them and they ignored or tolerated him.
You've been on and off with him for 7 years, that is a long time. Why the on and off?

STRAIGHT guys cheat on their girlfriends and bring home STDs and AIDS too... so... there's that.

If you don't have trust in fidelity... no matter the sexual orientation of your partner, you have some talking to do.

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Originally Posted by WisperWill70

STRAIGHT guys cheat on their girlfriends and bring home STDs and AIDS too... so... there's that.

if you don't have trust in fidelity... no matter the sexual orientation of your partner, you have some talking to do.

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Yes they do, but dealing with a man on the down low is in my opinion a double deceit

I don't get this notion of 'trying to convince him to admit it.' First of all, you are going on rumors. Second, he says he hasn't, so why are you trying to get him to 'admit' it? You WANT him to break down and say yes even when he says it isn't true? Do you see how bizarre that sounds? What if he does say he did it? What will you do? What if you get some proof elsewhere, like a photograph (that hasn't been Photoshopped)?
He's your boyfriend. You don't know what he has or hasn't done. End of story. Take it or leave it.

Calm down and take a chill pill. Friends are friends regardless of race, creed sex or color. These are his best friends and apparently they have a trust and a respect for one another. I agree, you should try to open your world and get to know them as people and as his friends. Open your world, there is a lot you can learn by being more acceptance of people, whether they are gay , straight, rich poor, I think gays have more to offer than just SEX... it's more to people than the sexual organs... geeesh!

You are right to be concerned. Please check out some of the videos on YouTube about people with AIDS. Listen to their stories. If you think your boyfriend is on the downlow, then be very careful, and take precautions. The best precaution would be abstinence. After abstinence would be condoms with a spermicide, but I am sure you know that condoms break, so a condom does not protect you totally form sexually transmitted diseases whether your boyfriend is gay, bi, or staraight.

YEAAAA... he might be gay! A couple gay friends?. yeaaa

Try to get to the bottom of it on your own. Look through text messages of his or try to find out his email password.

They're in a relationship together, so why shouldn't she be able to help herself to his text messages and emails? It wouldn't bother me, if my future partner went through my messages.

If your gf/bf gives your permission, that is one thing. It is quite another to just go snooping in their messages and email. I would not dream of going through my man's texts nor would I appreciate him going through mine. That is invasion of privacy.

Personally I'd prefer my girlfriend to HAVE my phone, that way she could see the text messages as I get them and she can decide rather or not I need to know about them or reply to them.

In this scenario you have to admit something seems kind of off, and if your boyfriend is gay, you being his girlfriend, have the right to find out. If you can get a glimpse of his phone without him knowing, I say go for it.

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Originally Posted by garboozle

Personally I'd prefer my girlfriend to HAVE my phone, that way she could see the text messages as I get them and she can decide rather or not I need to know about them or reply to them.

In this scenario you have to admit something seems kind of off, and if your boyfriend is gay, you being his girlfriend, have the right to find out. If you can get a glimpse of his phone without him knowing, I say go for it.

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So you think a person ought to decide for you, whether you should receive a phone call or a text? You are an adult right? Why would you give a woman that much power? Don't you have the sense to decide who you will and won't talk to?
If she thinks her boy friend is gay and is not satisfied with the answer he has given, she should leave him, not invade his privacy.