Why did I have sex with a straight guy?
I had a friend - let's call him Nick because that is his name. I've known Nick for about 4 years. He's a former Marine and hasn't had the greatest of lives. We have been hanging out doing stuff for several months. Honestly I liked being his friend and getting to know him.
We usually hang out with some other guys then just he and I go out afterwards. A few Thursdays ago he took my keys and wouldn't let me drive home. So he drives us to his place - he lives with a relative. Nick also does some illegal drugs which he was doing that evening.
When we got to his relatives house, we went into a bedroom and watched SportCenter. He did some more drugs. After that he took off his shirt. After the shirt he pulled his shorts done and wanted to be serviced. I didn't expect this at all. But I was drunk. That service turned into a whole night of sex. After that I fell asleep on that bed and Nick went to his bedroom.
After his relative left that next morning, Nick came into my bedroom, off came the shorts, and round two began. After that I did the walk of shame and we haven't talked since. I have texted him twice and had no response.
Here is my issue. I liked his friendship and really to me friendship is more important to me than any relationship. I am over relationships for now. By the way I am in my early 40s and Nick is in his mid 30s. I didn't ask for sex, I am mad at Nick, and I can't believe I've probably lost a friend. That is not what I wanted to happen. I didn't start the sex, I didn't restart the sex, but I am the bad guy because Nick won't talk to me. Damn you Nick, why did you have to kiss me?