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    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #41

    Mar 15, 2010, 07:07 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Raven0208 View Post
    You're pretty much exactly right about what you said about me. Thanks for all the advice.
    News flash. The majority of us feel this way at 17. We've all been there done that and lived to tell the tale. :)
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    EmoPrincess Posts: 1,068, Reputation: 92
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    #42

    Mar 15, 2010, 07:08 PM

    Raven, you are so much like me a year ago. I have faith in you. You are going to pull through this, will all of us here supporting you
    hheath541's Avatar
    hheath541 Posts: 2,762, Reputation: 584
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    #43

    Mar 15, 2010, 07:13 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Aurora_Bell View Post
    You know sometimes that's true. A lesson to maybe be a little kinder to people.

    Do you feel overwhelmed with making decisions for your future? It's true you know, when you start liking stuff about you, it's easier for other people to like things about you! I know that sounds super corney, but it's true. Like people have said, we're here to listen.
    I once heard a story about a man who was having a really bad day. The got up late, spilled coffee on yourself right before work, got a flat tire, had to walk to work in the rain kind of day.

    On his way into the building he worked at, he held the door open for someone. The man was wetter than him and looked like his day had sucked even more, so he smiled at him while he held the door. Then he went on his way, got in the elevator, went to work in his office, and forgot all about the other man.

    A couple days later he was opening the mail on his desk, when he noticed a thank you letter. Turns out, the other man had decided that morning that he was going to go to the roof of that building, and jump off. He told himself that if only ONE person smiled at him on the walk there, from several blocks over, that he wouldn't do it. That wet, upset businessman was the only person to smile at him that day, but he kept his promise to himself, and sent the businessman a thank you note to let him know how much that one, simple smile meant.

    Now, I know, the story probably never actually happened. That's never mattered to me, though. I know how much a smile or a kind word can mean on a day when it seems like life isn't worth living. Ever since I heard that story, I try to smile to everyone I pass, or meet, throughout the day. You never know when you're smile will mean the world to someone else. And, on the days you need a smile the most, giving one to someone else is the surest way to get one for yourself.
    Alty's Avatar
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    #44

    Mar 15, 2010, 07:16 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by xXxEmOxXxPrInCeSsxXx View Post
    Raven, you are so much like me a year ago. I have faith in you. you are gonna pull through this, will all of us here supporting you
    I'm here too. Count me in. :)

    I remember being a teen. That's one thing that most teens don't get, that we adults, well, we were teens once too. The times haven't changed that much since I was 17. I remember all too well how it felt. It wasn't fun. It was a daily struggle, but I survived it. We all did. You will too, if you give yourself a chance Raven.

    If you do give yourself a chance, give life a chance, one day you'll be here telling a teen not to give up, to give it a chance. That's why I'm here.

    I went through hell and back from the time I was five until, well, actually, the struggles and trials keep on coming.

    A few days ago I found out that I'm very anemic. I'll be going in for tests to find out why but the doctor is leaning towards cancer. Both my parents died of cancer in 2001. The C word to me is the scariest word in the world.

    One thing I can tell you, if it is cancer, I'll fight with everything in me. I will not give up. I will fight until I win. I plan to hold my grand kids one day and that's a long way off. I will fight for my life. You have to fight for yours.

    You have the choice Raven. You're young, you're healthy, you have a lifetime ahead of you. If everything goes downhill for me then I may not have a lifetime. I'm 39. That's not long enough.

    If I can fight, so can you. Right?

    So lets fight together. If I do have cancer I promise you that the last thing I'll ever do is give up. So don't you give up. Okay?
    hheath541's Avatar
    hheath541 Posts: 2,762, Reputation: 584
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    #45

    Mar 15, 2010, 07:18 PM

    One more thing. Tell us when you flush those pills. We will ALL cheer for you.

    I think all of us here have known someone who attempted/committed suicide and/or attempted it ourselves.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #46

    Mar 15, 2010, 07:19 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by hheath541 View Post
    i once heard a story about a man who was having a really bad day. the got up late, spilled coffee on yourself right before work, got a flat tire, had to walk to work in the rain kind of day.

    on his way into the building he worked at, he held the door open for someone. the man was wetter than him and looked like his day had sucked even more, so he smiled at him while he held the door. then he went on his way, got in the elevator, went to work in his office, and forgot all about the other man.

    a couple days later he was opening the mail on his desk, when he noticed a thank you letter. turns out, the other man had decided that morning that he was going to go to the roof of that building, and jump off. he told himself that if only ONE person smiled at him on the walk there, from several blocks over, that he wouldn't do it. that wet, upset businessman was the only person to smile at him that day, but he kept his promise to himself, and sent the businessman a thank you note to let him know how much that one, simple smile meant.

    now, i know, the story probably never actually happened. that's never mattered to me, though. i know how much a smile or a kind word can mean on a day when it seems like life isn't worth living. ever since i heard that story, i try to smile to everyone i pass, or meet, throughout the day. you never know when you're smile will mean the world to someone else. and, on the days you need a smile the most, giving one to someone else is the surest way to get one for yourself.

    Why do I always have to spread the rep? :(

    You just made me cry Heath.

    I'm sending a smile to everyone here. To everyone in the world.

    I love the saying "Smile, it makes people wonder what you're thinking". :)
    hheath541's Avatar
    hheath541 Posts: 2,762, Reputation: 584
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    #47

    Mar 15, 2010, 07:20 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Altenweg View Post
    A few days ago I found out that I'm very anemic. I'll be going in for tests to find out why but the doctor is leaning towards cancer. Both my parents died of cancer in 2001. The C word to me is the scariest word in the world.
    Alty, my heart just dropped through my stomach.
    Aurora_Bell's Avatar
    Aurora_Bell Posts: 4,193, Reputation: 822
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    #48

    Mar 15, 2010, 07:21 PM

    Smile. I'm here too Raven!
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #49

    Mar 15, 2010, 07:22 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by hheath541 View Post
    one more thing. tell us when you flush those pills. we will ALL cheer for you.

    i think all of us here have known someone who attempted/committed suicide and/or attempted it ourselves.
    My uncle did.

    That was over 25 years ago. His daughters still haven't forgiven him. His oldest daughter found him. He left a note on her bed.

    It's a major slap in the face. It's a "screw you" to everyone you love. It will effect them until the day they die. They'll never get over it. I never did, his daughters never did, no one ever did.

    To take your own life is a very selfish act.
    Alty's Avatar
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    #50

    Mar 15, 2010, 07:25 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by hheath541 View Post
    alty, my heart just dropped through my stomach.
    I started a thread about it Heath. I posted a link in Chicky's thread.

    Here's the link;

    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/other-...er-456286.html

    I just mentioned it here because I think Raven should know that life is precious. I am so terrified that the tests will come back with cancer. No matter what I will fight.

    My life isn't perfect but it's worth fighting for, just like everyone else's.

    Raven, you are unique. You are one of a kind. Fight for life. That's all I can say.

    Life is so precious. Life is what I'm hanging on to.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #51

    Mar 15, 2010, 07:26 PM

    Raven is off line. :(

    Raven, please come back. Talk to us. We're here for you. Okay?

    Go flush those pills. Please flush them.
    Aurora_Bell's Avatar
    Aurora_Bell Posts: 4,193, Reputation: 822
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    #52

    Mar 15, 2010, 07:26 PM

    My uncle hung himself in the garage, and a friend shot himself in the face on the night of prom. He didn't graduate, and was too embaressed to tell anyone. It's the worst feeling to feel as a family member or friend. It is a big slap in the face to the loved ones.
    Showme_urmove's Avatar
    Showme_urmove Posts: 319, Reputation: 101
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    #53

    Mar 16, 2010, 01:09 AM

    Hey raven, I don't know what you are going through right this moment, but what I can tell you is that I had a cozen that hung herself, her little daughter found her in the closet and her daughter was only 8 years old. She was depressed and felt like nothing was going for her in life. Even though she had a family that wasn't enough for her to live for "she already had it program in her mind that life isnt worth living for" and everyday she have that thought, always negative, nothing positive. You know the saying what you eat is what you will become. Will samething you will act on what you think, think negative you will do negative things, think positive you will do positive things. When I was your age, I moved with my sis and her boyfriend cause I wasn't getting along with my parents and brothers, I was the black sheep of the family, all my brothers would come home with a straight A grade and I would bring home an F. So when I moved out and lived with my sis and her boyfriend for 3 years I was treated like a slave, no friends no contact with family just did what they want me to do. I had to drop out from school because they wouldn't want to take me anymore so I was a high school drop out, so many times I wanted to end my life, but for some reason I know that things will be better its just a phase in my life that I had to get through and it's a test the lord and given me. So I stuck with it for a long time the abused, the pain everyday and the no social life. I hated it but I had to keep going. Then when I turned 21 I was about to be put in prison for 10 years maximum for a stupid thing I did. That was the last straw on the camels back, and I really want to end my life. But something didn't feel right so I talked to my family, they all helped me out, they got me a good lawyer and helped me get through what I was going through, when the case ended I was only put in a 3 years probation and a fine. I then realized that even though I thought I couldn't count on my family when it comes me really needing them I saw the love that I haven't seen ever since I was a child.a few years later with no high school diploma, a student with a GPA of less then 1.0 and a criminal record I had opened a business with a friend from high school. I had no experience of doing graphic design or even doing silkscreening, but for some reason God had put me where I'm supposed to be, and now I am doing all the schools P.E cloths and all the shirts. Out of the blue God had given me a business,I have no experience, no knowledge on it but hey now I know almost everything about it. IF you look at my life in paper, people would say I am a loser, a criminal, a person with no education, he is going to either end up dead or in prison. But look at me, I have a business, we hired a graphic designer to do our art, and he is currently in a university and his working for a person with no high school education. A good friend of mine always said "if you think your life is bad, go to the hospital and look at all the people that are sick, and would give everything up just to be healthy once again" someone else always have it worse then you, just be happy that you are going through this because in the future you may help some else that is going through what you are going through. I know how it feels but life is to good to just give it up. KNow the lord and pray to God it worked for me and I know it will work for you. IF you can do me this favor go to YouTube and listen to this music it will talk to your heart I promise you that. Its by third day and the title is cry out to jesus. Please listen to that song and let me know what you think about it. God is love, and he sent his son jesus christ to die for us, so you don't have to. Keep us posted we care about you. God bless.
    KISS's Avatar
    KISS Posts: 12,510, Reputation: 839
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    #54

    Mar 16, 2010, 01:59 AM

    Not being healthy is no fun especially when it's not going to get better.
    Raven0208's Avatar
    Raven0208 Posts: 40, Reputation: 6
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    #55

    Mar 16, 2010, 01:49 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Altenweg View Post
    Are you sure?

    Raven, I can guarantee you that I will care no matter what. I've been through a lot in my life, because of that I've made it a mission of mine to help others. That's why I'm on this site.

    I have a few requests, things that I'm hoping you'll agree to.

    1. Go to your doctor, get checked, tell him/her what's going on.
    2. Talk to your parents about this.
    3. Continue to post to us about what you're doing and how you're doing.
    4. Tomorrow I want you to go for a walk. Just 15 minutes. If you have a dog take him/her with you. Also bring a pad of paper and a pen. While you're walking write down 15 things that you see that brings you happiness. It can be anything, a blade of green grass (for me that would be great, all the grass is brown right now, some of it is still covered in snow), a bird, a cat, a person that smiles at you, a worm, anything. One per minute.

    Will you do that for me?

    Tomorrow, after your walk, post your list.

    I'll tell you 5 things on my list that happened in the last 15 minutes.

    1. My daughter just came inside, she was scared because of something her brother did. She needed a hug. Her hugs are the best, always make me smile.
    2. AMHD. The people on this site never cease to amaze me. Stick around and find out, they are they best people I've never met.
    3. I had some caramel corn. I love it. :)
    4. My puppy got out of the yard and came back when I called him.
    5. I met you and I have hope for you.


    1. It rained a lot over that last couple of days, and all the roads were flooded and the canals are higher. I like the water.
    2. There are little yellow flower starting to grow everywhere because of the rain.
    3. I saw some tadpoles in a few of the puddles. I hope they don't get run over.
    4. It was actually nice out today. Usually it's either too hot or too cold out here.
    5. I saw one of those huge caterpillars, the big brown furry ones. I haven't seen one since I lived up north.

    I could only get five :(
    Raven0208's Avatar
    Raven0208 Posts: 40, Reputation: 6
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    #56

    Mar 16, 2010, 01:52 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Altenweg View Post
    A few days ago I found out that I'm very anemic. I'll be going in for tests to find out why but the doctor is leaning towards cancer. Both my parents died of cancer in 2001. The C word to me is the scariest word in the world.

    One thing I can tell you, if it is cancer, I'll fight with everything in me. I will not give up. I will fight until I win. I plan to hold my grand kids one day and that's a long way off. I will fight for my life. You have to fight for yours.

    You have the choice Raven. You're young, you're healthy, you have a lifetime ahead of you. If everything goes downhill for me then I may not have a lifetime. I'm 39. That's not long enough.

    If I can fight, so can you. Right?

    So lets fight together. If I do have cancer I promise you that the last thing I'll ever do is give up. So don't you give up. Okay?
    I'm sorry to hear that you might have cancer. I hope everything turns out all right for you. :]

    But I'm a weak person. I don't know if I can do it.
    Raven0208's Avatar
    Raven0208 Posts: 40, Reputation: 6
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    #57

    Mar 16, 2010, 01:54 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Altenweg View Post
    Raven is off line. :(

    Raven, please come back. Talk to us. We're here for you. Okay?

    Go flush those pills. Please flush them.

    I'm sorry. I had such a headache and I just wanted to sleep.
    If I flush them, I'm just worried I'll go looking for more.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #58

    Mar 16, 2010, 02:32 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Raven0208 View Post
    1. It rained a lot over that last couple of days, and all the roads were flooded and the canals are higher. I like the water.
    2. There are little yellow flower starting to grow everywhere because of the rain.
    3. I saw some tadpoles in a few of the puddles. I hope they don't get run over.
    4. It was actually nice out today. Usually it's either too hot or too cold out here.
    5. I saw one of those huge caterpillars, the big brown furry ones. I haven't seen one since I lived up north.

    I could only get five :(
    Five is a start. Next time go for ten. :)

    Do you have a journal or a book you can write in?

    If you do, here's an "assignment" for you. Make it fun. I want you to write about 2 people in your life that you really care about and why.

    After you write about why you care about them, write about why they care about you. Come up with at least 2 things.

    After you do that, post it here. :)

    By the way, I love fuzzy caterpillars, they're so colorful and cute. :)
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #59

    Mar 16, 2010, 02:36 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Raven0208 View Post
    I'm sorry to hear that you might have cancer. I hope everything turns out alright for you. :]

    But I'm a weak person. I don't know if I can do it.
    You may feel weak right now but I bet there's strength in you.

    You came to this site for a reason. When you posted your question you had to know that we'd guess what you want to do. You called out for help, so there is fight in you.

    Toss out the pills sweetie. Flush them down the toilet and when you do see it as a new beginning. Your life starts today. We'll get you there, just give us a chance, give a doctors visit a chance, give your parents a chance.

    We're all here for you to get you further ahead, one step at a time. Take the first step, toss out the pills.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #60

    Mar 16, 2010, 02:48 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Altenweg View Post
    Flush them down the toilet
    No, no!! My pharmacist says to take them to a pharmacy for disposal or crush them, put them back into the bottle, add water to dissolve them, seal the bottle, and throw the sealed bottle into the trash.

    The OP spelled "physiologically" correctly. No one who does that should contemplate suicide. We need good spellers on this Earth.

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