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-   -   Advice for abused women. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=732171)

  • Feb 3, 2013, 11:27 PM
    mogrann
    Advice for abused women.
    I have said this before and will keep saying this as if it helps one woman keep her children and get out, maybe I will do some good.

    I was married to an abusive man. He was charged with abuse, unlawful confinement, uttering death threats, breaking restraining orders and that is only the ones I reported. I fell for the I am sorry and it was my fault I made him do it. It was my fault for looking out the car windows when men walked by as I was signalling to them a phone number to contact me at, it was my fault if supper was not ready, it was my fault if I was too tired to have sex, it was my fault if a toy was left on the floor, it was my fault I was ugly, it was my fault I was lazy, it was my fault it was my fault it was my fault... do you see a pattern?

    END RESULT: I was stupid; I risked my children. I risked my life with them. You see I lost custody of them. In most areas being in an abusive marriage is grounds to lose your kids as they are being harmed emotionally. I was so emotionally messed up I had a breakdown.
    Steps if you want to stay alive and keep your children are:
    1. Get legal documents and clothes packed. Passports, birth certificates, marriage license
    2. Call the police if he is abusing you
    3. Call a local battered women's shelter to get out
    4. Get counseling
    5. Get legal custody of your children.

    Please don't ruin your life like I did. The guilt will tear you up inside, believe me. GET OUT.
  • Feb 4, 2013, 04:00 AM
    Fr_Chuck
    In addition, have all the important papers stored at someone else's home, not your own home.
    Try and have money hidden away.

    Also if you go and have joint accounts, go take every penny you can and go

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