I'm on disability, have full body rheumatoid arthritis. Husband wants divorce, we own home, well making payments, we have one car, also making payments, he has 401k. We've been married 12 years and were together 7 years before that. What can or should I ask for in the divorce?

Hi because you've been married for 12 years your intitled to half of everything... the saying "whats his is yours and whats yours is his" applys to your question .

What can you ask for? Whatever you want.
What should you ask for? We can't say based on a little information. You can go the usual route of hiring a lawyer, who will fight for as much as possible, or you and your husband can go to a mediator, or you can each agree on a settlement and write your own agreement. (I did that, but we had no children and our only big asset was a bit of equity in a house. We borrowed friends' papers and plugged our names in.)

Only 9 states left are community property states, loosely meaning each is entitled to half.

In your case, if your husband is not feeling honorable and charitable, I would get a lawyer, who just for starters can get financial information possibly hidden from you or lied to you about.
You might be best served by alimony over a just lump sum, keeping in mind how disability benefits will be affected.

I gave my answer on me living in the uk.

Comment on bailey3012's post
I gave my answer on me living in the uk.

Then you should have specified you were answering for the UK. You usually can't make a definitive statement on law without knowing location.