Ask Me Help Desk

Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum.php)
-   Death & Dying (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=94)
-   -   My boyfriend is in a coma, parents won't let me visit, what can I do? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=814477)

  • Jul 24, 2015, 10:58 AM
    kimia_violin
    My boyfriend is in a coma, parents won't let me visit, what can I do?
    My boyfriend went to coma on Sunday a week ago,. he had a bus accident , he was on his way to meet me but I told him I couldn't meet him , because my parents are extremely strict , and so he was on his way to his house that a bus crashed him and his bike,. he collapsed his lung and has 2 casts on his arm,. they said he will be OK,. 1 day past , 2 days , 3,. but he didn't wake up , I went to visit him yesterday , my parents don't let me , so that was the only time I could go and meet him , I went and I break down , because I never thought my nightmare will come true,. :'( I held his hand and begged him to wake up , exactly the day of the accident we met in the morning and he promised me that he will stay with me no matter what,. and I was telling him next to his bed that , you promised :'( so you got to fulfil it , come back and show your love to me, for me wake up please,. his doctors said he has a bad brain damaged because his head been damaged badly , so he might not wake up at all forever,. they tried wake him up but he moved his hands in a weird way,. and they tried today too , and the nurse said he only coughed once and did breath a bit without the oxygen machine,. I called the hospital and asked them to put the phone next to his ear , his dad said when I was talking to him , while he was stilll sleeping he had tears in his eyes,. but then the nurse said his blood pressure went high so they put all medications back on,. I don't know how to deal with this,. unfortunately I'm leaving for holiday and I cant cancel it because my mum and dad think he is only my best friend and if they find out that I loved him they'll stop me from visiting completely,.
    I don't know what to do , I don't know how to deal,. please help me,. and tell me what to do,. I prayed a lot,. how am I supposed to carry on ? I don't know what to do,. I feel so broken , so shattered down,. please help me,.
  • Jul 24, 2015, 03:45 PM
    joypulv
    Look at it this way: it might be a good sign that his blood pressure shot up. Sounds like he could hear you and understand. BUT with a head injury, you don't want to drive up his pressure!
    Call the nurses and ask them to tell him every day that you are away with your parents and will see him when you get back.

    You carry on the way all of us do. You love your loved ones while they are alive, and you grieve when they die.

    You pretend he is your best friend for your sake and his! "Only" best friend? What is better than that? Love is just frosting on the cake. Lucky couples who are together for years are "just best friends" who care about each other deeply, and that is love. Love isn't romantic angst.

    I'm very sorry this happened to him.
    Please be aware and considerate of his family too. Remember, they have loved him a lot longer than you have. This is mainly about them.
    Ask if you can do things for them, errands, anything.

  • All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:17 PM.