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    entourage's Avatar
    entourage Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Mar 15, 2012, 01:47 PM
    My GF broke up with me, we were dating for 1.5 years
    My GF broke up with me, we were dating for 1.5 years.. I used the link below on survival

    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relationships/how-break-up-survive-101-use-you-wish-510418.html

    She said she does not have the same feelings for me anymore and that by going out were just prolonging the break-up, she was crazy about me in our first 1 year. We broke up about 2.5 weeks ago and I then told her I think we rushed into this and let the emotions get the best of us and to talk when she is ready. I told her she might need space and I don't want to be broken up, and see what the issues are that caused this and she said she needs time and will call me when she is ready.

    I followed the rules and did NC - she msged me 1 weeek later to enjoy my vacation and not to think too much into this and have fun, and I thanked her and asked her how she was. We did not speak for another 10 days and she contacted me again asking me to talk.
    She said she talked to her friends and a counsellor and this was the right decision for her. The hard part is everything was really good between us, the chemistry and communication was there, she was like there is no reasons, which is why this is so hard. And I was hoping that the time apart she would realize there are issues that we could work and fix because it opened my eyes (false hope - which made it hurt even more). She said there isn't anything to fix really and it was not my fault and she doesn't want to keep hurting me. She said her feelings aren't there anymore and she's type person that knows she is in love and she's not feeling that way for me anymore. At the end, to me this does feel right as well, because she was a bit distant last few months since we started going out and I felt that she wanted to break up with me, but we both were very scared of the next step. But I am hurting a lot and I need to start putting closure to this chapter in my life.

    I am anxious of telling my friends and I feel very down and sad thinking about the future, but I know I will be back again. I know she is hurting too, but I think I need to delete her from Facebook and even BBM. I am wondering what is the best way to tell my friends because I know it will help me but at the same it hurts me a lot ?
    DaniCalifornia's Avatar
    DaniCalifornia Posts: 655, Reputation: 152
    Senior Member
     
    #2

    Mar 16, 2012, 02:17 PM
    Relationships don't ever work when only one party wants it to.

    It is a horrible feeling. Even though you can sometimes tell it's coming, the 'talk' always feels like a sudden stab.

    You're in the right frame of mind at the moment. No contact. It'll help you get over her quicker. Keep yourself busy, and tell friends not to update you with how she's doing. I had a friend once tell me tell me "Oh you know (your ex), he's got a job with microsoft!"... Why the need to tell me?

    x Dani
    entourage's Avatar
    entourage Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #3

    Mar 17, 2012, 09:16 AM
    Yah, I am doing okay when I talk to some of my close friends about it, but when I am alone, that's when I get really down and sad, and I feel like that's I need to handle this on my own. Does anybody have tips on how to handle this ?
    DaniCalifornia's Avatar
    DaniCalifornia Posts: 655, Reputation: 152
    Senior Member
     
    #4

    Mar 17, 2012, 09:46 AM
    Try NOT to be on your own.

    If you're busy, you won't be thinking about it. Take up a new hobby. Learning something new requires a lot of concentration.
    entourage's Avatar
    entourage Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Mar 26, 2012, 10:25 AM
    So I finally deleted her from Facebook, it was bitter sweat - I saw a hope of a new beginning, but at the same time, I am not over her 100%, maybe 5-10%, so it still hurt a lot. I also closed the final chat we had on BBM.

    However I left her a song from cold play- scientist on her wall - but I feel like I broke the NC rules by doing that - so feeling a bit down about that. Obiviously I still have hope that we can fix this but yes day by day, I am getting over her. I have been going through a roller coaster of emotions.

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