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Dark but not Heartless
May 25, 2007, 06:57 PM
Look, I don't mean to state the obvious, but girls are just evil. I love this girl, but I'm fed up with the way our relationships been going.

We have known each other for roughly 3 years, and about halfway through she admitted to having a huge crush on me. For a while I didn't want to go out with her cause we already had such a great friendship, but soon I developed a crush on her as well, and finally asked her to be my girlfriend.

We broke up a month later, because she said she was unhappy with the fact that we lived so far apart, and hardly ever saw each other. I knew that trying to resist a breakup eould just make things worse, so I let her go. But she said she still loved me, and I obviously felt the same way. She even tells people that she's still taken.

Now she seems to be avoiding conversations with me, and if I try to start talking to her, she'll say a few words and then says she has to go. I know she's got several extra-curricular activities, but even when she spends time online, she still won't talk to me unless I pressure her to. And yes, I know that's the wrong thing to do, and I feel bad for doing it, but I feel even worse for letting her ignore me and not trying to do anything about it.

I need help :(

thegoodshepherd
May 28, 2007, 09:48 AM
This is the way it is. Girls are heartless users. They know us honest guys like 1 gilr and usually will do anything for that one. So they use us. So this is what I would do INGNORE HER it will either make her want to talk to you or it will piss her off. 50/50 chance gl

Dark but not Heartless
May 29, 2007, 06:17 AM
this is the way it is. girls are heartless users. they know us honest guys like 1 gilr and usualy will do anything for that one. so they use us. so this is what i would do INGNORE HER it will either make her want to talk to you or it will piss her off. 50/50 chance gl

Thanks, but she's one of my best friends, and I'm grateful for the advice, but I don't really want to go that far. It seems a little immature. Sorry

fix-what-you-broke
May 29, 2007, 02:46 PM
"girls are heartless users"... thats funny, I could say the same about every man I have ever been out with, but I won't get into pettyness...
Maybe this girl has realized that what she has wanted all along with you isn't worth the risk of breaking up your friendship if you guys split up for good.maybe she is thinking that she may lose you as a friend as well.
You guys need to talk things out,

Dark but not Heartless
May 30, 2007, 03:10 AM
"girls are heartless users"...thats funny, i could say the same about every man i have ever been out with, but i wont get into pettyness...
maybe this girl has realized that what she has wanted all along with you isnt worth the risk of breaking up your friendship if you guys split up for good.maybe she is thinking that she may lose you as a friend as well.
you guys need to talk things out,

Thanks. I keep trying that, but all I ever get is a "hello", "im good", and "gotta go". It seems like she doesn't want to talk to me, and I'm worried that there might be somebody else, even though she said she still likes like a boyfriend (just not calling it that)

fix-what-you-broke
May 30, 2007, 10:20 AM
OK you say you have to force her to talk sometimes, I don't really get that, as if she didn't want to talk she wouldn't, she would just block you.
I know it probably won't work, but send her an email and ask her if she will meet you, no pressure, as you need to talk to her, ask her when would be a good time and make it clear you will not pressure her at all.
If she agrees to meet you, lay your cards on the table, tell her how you feel, tell her how her ignoring you is making you feel then ask her to be honest with you, tell her she was the one to tell you she had this huge crush on you, then now nothing. Tell her you do not want to waste your time if she isn't interested in you anymore.
Tell her if she doesn't want you anymore to just be honest with you and you will be on your way.
All it takes is honesty, I don't think it is fair the way she is just ignoring you like this.
If she gets the email and doesn't respond, or emails back saying no I think you should just cut your losses and try to move on as its not fair if she is playing games with you.

Dark but not Heartless
May 30, 2007, 12:03 PM
ok you say you have to force her to talk sometimes, i dont really get that, as if she didnt want to talk she wouldnt, she would just block you.
i know it probably wont work, but send her an email and ask her if she will meet you, no pressure, as you need to talk to her, ask her when would be a good time and make it clear you will not pressure her at all.
if she agrees to meet you, lay your cards on the table, tell her how you feel, tell her how her ignoring you is making you feel then ask her to be honest with you, tell her she was the one to tell you she had this huge crush on you, then now nothing. tell her you do not want to waste your time if she isnt interested in you anymore.
tell her if she doesnt want you anymore to just be honest with you and you will be on your way.
all it takes is honesty, i dont think it is fair the way she is just ignoring you like this.
if she gets the email and doesnt respond, or emails back saying no i think you should just cut your losses and try to move on as its not fair if she is playing games with you.

Thanks. I'll try that.

paganheart71
May 31, 2007, 11:36 AM
Sh eseems that she doesn't want to hurt you're feelings or she wants to drag you around. I would stop trying to talk to her. Just let her go. If she wants to talk she will. Just treat her as a friend and no more. Don't pressure her to talk if she doesn't want to

Dark but not Heartless
May 31, 2007, 11:53 AM
Sh eseems that she doesn't want to hurt you're feelings or she wants to drag you around. i would stop trying to talk to her. just let her go. if she wants to talk she will. Just treat her as a friend and no more. don't pressure her to talk if she doesn't want to

I know not to pressure her. But what happened was exactly what we were afraid of. Before we got together we warned ourselves that a breakup would damage our friendship, and we still took the risk. I'm not rying to repair our relationship. I'm trying to repair our friendship. Cause now we're even farther apart than we were as just friends

paganheart71
May 31, 2007, 01:37 PM
Sorry about that. It will just take time to repair this friendship. You could (if you already haven't) write in detail an email or letter and tell her what you told us you that you don't want to lose her as a friend. Tell her that is all you want, just to be friends. But just write it all out ( I hope she comes around)

Dark but not Heartless
May 31, 2007, 02:43 PM
Sorry about that. It will just take time to repair this friendship. You could (if you already haven't) write in detail an email or letter and tell her what you told us you that you don't want to lose her as a friend. tell her that is all you want, just to be friends. but just write it all out ( i hope she comes around)

Thanks