View Full Version : Amicable split
radiant rose
May 6, 2007, 04:09 AM
Hi this is Radiant Rose. Last week my boyfriend and I split up after 2months together, (not very long together I hear u say), nevertheless I am upset because, he was very caring,tactile and attentive during that time. We met at an online introduction, and yes I vetted every guy I spoke to online as to protect my safety and principles I have i.e. getting an idea of prospective partners etc. We spoke to each other online and mobile before we took that vital step to meet up, which I am glad I did because we hit it off from day 1 online. He is very witty,intelligent,and says he will contact you when he said he would too, which seemed to tick all the boxes, he actually gave me my nickname Radiant Rose which I found sweet. We went on amazing dates and also had gotten intimate too, (no not one night stands), we did a couple of times spent weekends together as well. He also went back to his hometown alone last weekend, for a friend's party, yes I thought that was strange too when he never invited me to go along with him. Anyway I told him to have a good time and that we will speak when he gets back. On the Monday he text me early that morning saying he wasn't ready for a relationship with anyone because he had time to think that he wanted to stay single for a while and wanted very much to remain as friends. I asked him why he actually took the trouble to advertise himself online, saying he wanted a long term relationship. He replied at the time he thought he wanted that special lady in his life, which is what I wanted to be. At first I was angry, upset and bitter at the time, thinking HOW DARE HIM TO TREAT ME LIKE THAT WHAT A BASTARD. After a lot of soul searching and many tears later, I sent him a long text saying that I'm glad he found the courage to tell me and that there is no hard feelings and would like to be his friend. I am having my own thoughts in hoping that in time once we have spent time hanging out as friends that he will see me in a different light and reconsider getting back together once he see that what he is throwing away, (one can only hope and pray I guess) I would appreciate other peoples opinion on this matter.
brandy681
May 6, 2007, 04:36 AM
I don't think that your boyfriend gave you a fair explantation of why he broke up with you after his wanting a long term relationship. Probably something happened when he went to that party, maybe he hooked up with an old flame or possibly he realized that he wanted to be single, date other people or play the field so to speak. Maybe he realized that he just wanted space and his freedom and doesn't want a relationship right now. I would let him go and be happy that he didn't brake up with you years down the road. The longer you are in a relationship the harder it will be to let go and you will think about how much time and energy you waisted in the releationship. It will be so hard I know even if it is only a two month relationship it may take 6 months to get over him but it is better now than later. If you hang around him now wanting something more you will probably be in for a hurting later on. Just don't call him and you can be friends but try to stay your distance. I know this is probably not what you wanted to hear and he may want to get back with you later own but maybe he will do the same thing and you do not deserve to get hurt like that.
AW805
May 6, 2007, 10:53 AM
Do you really want someone back who would treat you like that? It sounds like he really wasn't looking for a long term relationship to begin with. Who knows how many other on line women he has done this to. Move on and don't wait for this deadbeat anymore. Don't waste anymore more tears and thoughts on him. You deserve better than that!
Bluerose
May 6, 2007, 11:36 AM
Forgive the harshness but... It's never going to happen. I'm sure you re very careful about on line dating but online or not there is no way to know if we are being told the truth or just played. The net is a wonderful place for people to meet people, and especially for people who just want to have a good time before deciding to settle down. This doesn't mean they are bad people, they just want to have some fun. And I believe you should look at them all in that light until they prove otherwise. And continue to take your own safety seriously. Always meet in a public place.
talaniman
May 6, 2007, 01:56 PM
I think that he was honest with you ,and he realised that you were not the one, so back to the web he goes. Seems you were more smitten than he was, and that's the way it goes sometimes. So just put him in the past and move on. Not to defend him, but he deserves a change in heart, and he didn't really lead you on. Next time hold off on the sex, so you don't get so emotionally involved after a few months. Sorry it didn't work.