Hello!
A couple of months ago I discovered that I am not BF of two children who my wife gave birth in our marriage.We are still married.A neighbour of us initiated a law suit against us because he believes that he is BF of the second child who has his eye-color.My wife and I took private DNA tests which excluded me like BF of both children.My wife asserts that she has never suspected that I am not the BF and she explains that the first child was resulted as "one off" with a stranger a day before our first meeting.The second one was resulted as a brief affair and she she had dismissed the reproductive potential of these encounters.
I have some questions:
1.Does the real BF of the second child has standing for suit if my wife and I opposite ?
2.What will happen if he prevails on the trial?
If he prevails can I sue him for reimbursement?
3.Can I disestablish my paternity of the first child if the court disestablishes my paternity of the second one?
4.How will it refer to the annulment or changing of our marriage contract?
Every opinion counts because I am very confused.

1. The real bio father has legal standing to be the father, and obligations to pay child support ( in most US states)

2. he will get visitation rights and have to pay child support

3. You have already proved you are not the father by the DNA test

4. doubt if a annulment is valid, in most cases you can have a divorce if you want,

It all depends on where are you in.Some states have rules barring challenges to the husband’s paternity more than two/or 5/ years after the child’s birth .Other-not.My answers:
1.Does the real BF of the second child has standing for suit if my wife and I opposite ?
A:It depends on the state law and the child age./under UPA/.
2.What will happen if he prevails on the trial?If he prevails can I sue him for reimbursement?
A:Your paternity will be disestablished and he will have the legal status as a father with all duties-visitation,child support... but have a mind that the child's last name will be changed.I think the court would not give you reimbursement because our court system is unfair to the victims of paternity fraud or"discrepancy".
3.Can I disestablish my paternity of the first child if the court disestablishes my paternity of the second one?
A:Maybe not because courts treat the mother’s husband as her children’s father... If the BF is unavailable you will be punished by court.
4.How will it refer to the annulment or changing of our marriage contract?
A:The best situation-court will reduce her property and/or alimony

It all depends on where are you in.Some states have rules barring challenges to the husband’s paternity more than two/or 5/ years after the child’s birth .Other-not.My answers:
1.Does the real BF of the second child has standing for suit if my wife and I opposite ?
A:It depends on the state law and the child age./under UPA/.
2.What will happen if he prevails on the trial?If he prevails can I sue him for reimbursement?
A:Your paternity will be disestablished and he will have the legal status as a father with all duties-visitation,child support...but have a mind that the child's last name will be changed.I think the court would not give you reimbursement because our court system is unfair to the victims of paternity fraud or"discrepancy".
3.Can I disestablish my paternity of the first child if the court disestablishes my paternity of the second one?
A:Maybe not because courts treat the mother’s husband as her children’s father...If the BF is unavailable you will be punished by court.
4.How will it refer to the annulment or changing of our marriage contract?
A:The best situation-court will reduce her property and/or alimony



I agree but for one small thing, it's really not even important but you did such a good job that I don't have anything else to post. I don't think the child's name will get changed. But you are very right about the court system being unfair. I used to think it was more
So towards men, (and it is) but I am seeing allot more women getting screwed. I also would like to add this advice, run don't walk, to a lawyers office and get a divorce.

I agree but for one small thing, it's really not even important but you did such a good job that I don't have anything else to post. I don't think the childs name will get changed. But you are very right about the court system being unfair. I used to think it was more
so towards men, (and it is) but I am seeing allot more women getting screwed. I also would like to add this advice, run don't walk, to a lawyers office and get a divorce.
Hello,Matt3046!
I have never said that the child's name will get changed... I said that the child's family name will get changed according the court paternity establishment.:)

I would say finding out that your not the father of both children. Would give you enough reason to actually go and get a divorce.

Joe

We do not know whether he wants to save his family... If I am not mistaken he is willing to remain both children father but he is not willing to remain as a legal father of one.I think he has some reasons for it.Our society is not fair and tolerant as all... If this fact will spread around he will have a lot of problems with his friends,co-workers and relatives.

Not to mention the children as they grow up.

Not to mention the children as they grow up.
Why?
What about if it will be court ordered?

If you have raised these kids as your own does a piece of paper change all that. Your children know nothing of a court order, only that their life is disrupted and changed, so honestly what's in the best interest of those kids? I can understand harboring bad feelings for the wife, and resenting the other guy for wanting to be in his child's life, what cannot be forgiven is the selfish adults not stepping up and putting the kids first, sorry just me. Actually you can walk away, and not look back, since you have no kids to support legally. You should consult a good lawyer to make sure of your options and rights where you live.

Hello again!
I am not sure that you understand this situation clearly.There are two aspects-legal and social.Our society has never answered what legal fatherhood is.Some scientists describe fatherhood as a multiple fatherhood including legal,social,emotional,support,psychological and other sorts of fatherhood.The government goal is to proclaim biological fathers as legal fathers with designation aggressive children support collection.This is the right policy when it is directed to children born out of wedlock.The question is more complicated when there are marital children with paternity"DISCREPANCY'.
1.Legal aspects
Because government wants to collect money for child support it welcomes paternity disestablishments and inclines to restrict marital fathers'rights and to impose them only obligations "WITH RESPECT".This policy is totally unfair to marital fathers when there is no biological father on scene or mothers do not like to disclose who they are.The court will never allow disestablishment when the biological father is unknown but the court will disestablish paternity of the marital father with great pleasure if the biological father appears on scene and despite objections to it from the marital couple.
In Windward's situation I can see the worst of our legislation and court practice.First:the court will not allow him to disestablish his paternity to first child because the BF is unknown or his wife does not like to disclose who he is.There is no another man to transfer the support obligation and I believe that the judge will say,''You play father's role for a long time and despite you have no biological connection to the child you have to remain his legal father with support obligation''.Second:the court will allow disestablishment to the second child and judge will say to WINDWARD:''You play father's role for a long time and because you have no biological connection to the child you have no legal standings to remain a legal father...''That's not justice.
2.Social aspects
The second issue is about the responce of the society.I do not think that his friends,relatives and co-workers will accept this situation.I know from bitter experience as a researcher and research analyst that the closest relatives and friends probably will be willing to leave this disestablished father.That is not a question about relations between BF,child and marital father,not about a piece of paper..That is more complex question and probably the microsociety reaktion will give an expression from"He is a stupid cuckold' TO ''He is an impotent gay''.Windward will lose face.

I know that this type of disestablishment claims lead to family break dawns and children povetry.Your opinion?

I am not sure that you understand this situation clearly.

The court will do as they do, so that is irrelevant. What other people think is irrelevant. The issue is the kids having a father in their lives. My first stop is to a lawyer, to get a divorce.

How old is the oldest child? How old is the youngest? The length of time for which you raised them may influence a judge's decision... you may still end up with some sort of visitation if you seek it, as it would be in the best interest of the child to maintain the relationship he has built with you.

How old is the oldest child? How old is the youngest? The length of time for which you raised them may influence a judge's decision...you may still end up with some sort of visitation if you seek it, as it would be in the best interest of the child to maintain the relationship he has built with you.
They are 2 and 5

Yo can visit gv70.wordpress.com (http://www.gv70.wordpress.com)
There are a lot of court cases and other opinions.

If either of the bio fathers wants to play a role in the kids' lives, they will be permitted by the courts once it is proven they are the father, but you can most likely still obtain visitation somehow, although it will be limited. (We're talking about dividing a child's life between 3 parties now... ) If only one bio dad is interested in seeking partial custody of his kid, can you ask the other if he'd be willing to allow you to adopt his child? Then you'd have all the legal rights of a natural parent. Then again, if he doesn't know he is the bio dad and your name is on the birth certificate, I don't see how your paternity of the oldest would come into question. It would just be a private matter between you and your wife. What happens really depends on the bio dads of these two children. You should hire a family attorney and get real legal help if you want to carry on playing a role in the kids' lives. I wish you luck, you sound like a decent guy in a tough spot.

[QUOTE=talaniman]If you have raised these kids as your own does a piece of paper change all that. Your children know nothing of a court order, only that their life is disrupted and changed, so honestly what's in the best interest of those kids? I can understand harboring bad feelings for the wife, and resenting the other guy for wanting to be in his child's life, what cannot be forgiven is the selfish adults not stepping up and putting the kids first, sorry just me. Actually you can walk away, and not look back, since you have no kids to support legally. You should consult a good lawyer to make sure of your options and rights where you live.:mad: QUOTE]

I think it is the peak of feminist thinking

DO you want a divorce? I don't think that has been said, has it? Do you want to be a dad to these kids?
I mean what is it that you want to have happen? For the father to just go away and let you and your family live your lives? How long have you known that these kids aren't biologically yours?
Did you get married because she was pregnant and you thought it was your child?

I think it is the peak of feminist thinking

If telling you to consult a lawyer to find out what is legal, as far as your rights and options, is feminist thinking, I can see why you are confused.
If putting the interest of the innocent children before the whims and wants of irresponsible adults, is feminist thinking, then I'm guilty.
See a lawyer, and find out what you think is the right thing to do.

DO you want a divorce? I don't think that has been said, has it? Do you want to be a dad to these kids?
I mean what is it that you want to have happen? For the father to just go away and let you and your family live your lives? How long have you known that these kids aren't biologically yours?
Did you get married because she was pregnant and you thought it was your child?
Q;DO you want a divorce?
A:No,I don't
Q: Do you want to be a dad to these kids?
A:Yes I do... but to both children.
Q:How long have you known that these kids aren't biologically yours?
A:For a few months.
Q:Did you get married because she was pregnant and you thought it was your child
A:Yes,I did

Does she want a divorce?

Does she want a divorce??
Noooooooo!We want to live in peace...

Where are you in?Where do you live?

I think when the dust settes then you will have peace, and will be Dad to both kids, as they very seldom take a child from the mother. He may get a visitation and pay child support but custody? Can't see it. Hang in and see what a lawyer tells you.

If you do not want a divorce - you can still be a dad to both children. Sometimes biology doesn't make a "dad". I would just ride this out and be there for each other.
Since neither of you want a divorce - this may make you stronger.
No court can make you stop loving a child.

No court can make you stop loving a child.
But court can destroy our life...
P.S. I live in Indiana.

But court can destroy our life...
P.S. I live in Indiana.

It can also set guidelines and settle disputes.

The court isn't going destroy your lives. The actions of your wife with another man is what is going to destroy your lives. I don't mean to be harsh - but if you are not the biological father of these kids - that person has rights and a court will make sure they have a place in the kid's life.
But, you still get to be a part of their everyday life. You still get be there. That is worth something.
Bottom line, you are in this situation - YOU can make this as bad as you want or as good as you want.

Child custody and guardianship are legal terms which are sometimes used to describe the legal and practical relationship between a parent and his or her child, such as the right of the parent to make decisions for the child, and the parent's duty to care for the child.Sole custody is an arrangement whereby only one parent has physical and legal custody of a child and the other parent has visitation rights.This is the opposite of joint custody which is shared custody.

The court isn't going destroy your lives. The actions of your wife with another man is what is going to destroy your lives. I don't mean to be harsh - but if you are not the biological father of these kids - that person has rights and a court will make sure they have a place in the kid's life.
But, you still get to be a part of their everyday life. You still get be there. That is worth something.
Bottom line, you are in this situation - YOU can make this as bad as you want or as good as you want.
Yes-you are right... but if the court allows his claim it will be a tragedy for me... Besides that this man visited my co-workers,neibourghs and some of my relatives and explained them all that because I am 'an impotent b*stard "/that is not true of course/ he is'the real man because he impregnated my wife with ta child'...Everyone laughed at me and everyone did sneers at me.Last week I went to work and there the first which I heard was"Hi,. I would like to inform you that I have a baby!Go to sign the paternity acknoledgment and take care of the baby... I will appear when the child grows up... "That was all day,, I had leave:(


Last Friday I visited a lawyer and/v.$400/she advised me to wait and see whether the court will allow his claim.

Ok-I find Indiana code.Look here.I will give you a strategy;) ;)

IC 31-14-4-1
Persons permitted to file action
(2) A man alleging that:
(A) he is the child's biological father;
IC 31-14-5-3
Time for filing action
(b) The mother, a man alleging to be the child's father, or the
Department or its agents must file a paternity action not later than two
(2) years after the child is born,
IC 31-14-5-6
Necessary parties
31-14-5-6 Sec. 6. The child, the child's mother, and each person
Alleged to be the father are necessary parties to each action.
IC 31-14-5-7
Registration with putative father registry
31-14-5-7 Sec. 7. A man who files or is a party to a paternity
Action shall register with the putative father registry under IC 31-19-5.


IC 31-14-6-1
Blood or genetic testing
31-14-6-1 Sec. 1. Upon the motion of any party, the court shall
Order all of the parties to a paternity action to undergo blood or
Genetic testing. A qualified expert approved by the court shall
Perform the tests.
IC 31-14-6-2
Objections and admissibility
31-14-6-2 Sec. 2. A party may object to the admissibility of
Genetic test results obtained under section 1 of this chapter (or
IC 31-6-6.1-8(a) before its repeal) if the party files a written
Objection at least thirty (30) days before a scheduled hearing at
Which the test results may be offered as evidence.If a party does not
File an objection under this section (or IC 31-6-6.1-8(b) before its
Repeal), the test results are admissible as evidence of paternity
Without the necessity of:
(1) foundation testimony; or
(2) other proof;
Regarding the accuracy of the test results.
IC 31-14-6-3
Test results; effect; admissibility
(2) are admissible in all paternity proceedings, unless the court
Excludes the results or finding for good cause.
IC 31-14-7
Chapter 7. Presumption of Paternity
31-14-7-1 Sec. 1. A man is presumed to be a child's biological
Father if:
(1) the:
(A) man and the child's biological mother are or have been
Married to each other;
IC 31-14-10-1
Hearing to determine support, custody, and parenting time
Following initial determination of paternity; order to probation
Officer or caseworker to prepare report
31-14-10-1 Sec. 1. Upon finding that a man is the child's
Biological father, the court shall, in the initial determination, conduct
A hearing to determine the issues of support, custody, and parenting
Time. Upon the request of any party or on the court's own motion, the
Court may order a probation officer or caseworker to prepare a report
To assist the court in determining these matters.


IC 31-14-20
Chapter 20. Registration With Putative Father Registry
IC 31-14-20-1
Duty to register
31-14-20-1 Sec. 1. (a) This section does not apply to a man whose
Paternity is established under this article (or IC 31-6-6.1 before its
Repeal) before the filing of a petition to adopt the man's child.
(b) A man who files or is a party to a paternity action under this
Article shall register with the putative father registry under
IC 31-19-5 within the period provided under IC 31-19-5-12.

Well, this guy sounds like a winner. What does it prove going around saying things like that? That is total B.S.! And that is pretty bold considering that there isn't a paternity test stating that he IS the father. You could still be right?
Those are the kinds of people you want to punch! BUT DON'T! Your goal is to keep your family intact. That will be hard to do in jail and with a record. Just take a deep breath and take the high road.
And I know attorneys are EXPENSIVE - but you have to have one to protect your family.

If only one bio dad is interested in seeking partial custody of his kid, can you ask the other if he'd be willing to allow you to adopt his child? Then you'd have all the legal rights of a natural parent. .
The clerk answered me that I cannot adopt these children because I am still their legal father.:) Paradoxial... If I go to court and ask to adopt them-the answer is that I cannot do it.If I go to court and ask to remove my name from their birth sertificates-the answer is that I cannot do it because I am their presumed father... but if someone goes to court and ask for paternity suit the court will grant him lawsuitl with pleasure.Everyone has rights, I have obligations only.I read somewhwre this sentence,'If you are duped-you are duped.If you are not duped-you are not duped... but either way you pay!! "-It is for me:)

My advices:
In my opinion you have a good chance.He has rights under Indiana Family Code .He can ask for DNA test but under IC31-14-6-2 Sec. 2 you and your wife can object to the admissibility of genetic test results obtained under section 1.You can cite Chapter 7. Presumption of Paternity-31-14-7-1 Sec. 1. A man is presumed to be a child's biological father if:the man and the child's biological mother are or have been married to each other.
Have a look at IC 31-14-20-1-Sec. 1.(b) A man who files or is a party to a paternity action under this article shall register with the putative father registry under IC 31-19-5 within the period provided under IC 31-19-5-12.If he is not registered there the reasonable question is why he waited too long...
Look at IC 31-14-6-3 Test results are admissible in all paternity proceedings, unless the court excludes the results or finding for good cause.The good cause-that is the question!
The child’s mother and your right opposed to the putative father’s right to respect for your respective private and family life right to security with you then current de facto family... Cite Marriage of Freeman, 53 Cal.Rptr.2d 439, 447 -' biology is not the predominant consideration in determining parental responsibility once a child has reached his or her third year of life”/I am sure if there is a lawsuit it will be in progress for many years... /or cite Massachusetts. Massachusetts, for example, has held that a third party can offer genetic evidence to establish his legal paternity of a married woman’s child if he can show that he and the child already have “a substantial parent-child relationship.Also you can cite Numerick v. krull/the trial court properly determined that plaintiff’s action was barred by both the language of the Paternity Act,reasoning that plaintiff could not maintain this action because the child was not “born out of wedlock” within the meaning of the statute./,R.N. v. J.M./And while this presumption is rebuttable according to law, the challenging party must first show that rebutting that presumption is in the best interest of a child whose parents were married at the time the child was born and perhaps, as in this case, remain married and plan to continue as the only parents the child has ever known./The discretionary “may” language in section 16-43-901(e)(1) allows a chancellor to consider the particular circumstances of each case and the child’s best interest before ordering a paternity test that could orever change a child’s life, perhaps merely because the adults who caused such a tumultuous situation are curious to know the results of their infidelity.The best interests of the child should be considered by the trial court before ordering a blood OR DNA test.

When The biological father appears on the scene • What the divorce decree says is very important. If the divorce decree declares that
The child in question is a child of the marriage (or words to that effect), courts
Usually consider that finding is binding at least between the ex-husband and exwife

If there are two presumptions operating in the case
(i.e. the marital presumption and a presumption based on genetic tests), the court is to
Follow the one based on weightier considerations of policy and logic

What did your lawyer say about the code listed above that mentions that a biological parent must come forward within 2 years of the birth of the child? Is that valid or do the courts sometimes extend that age? I know the child in question here is 2.

Unfortunately when he entered an action the child was 1 year 11 month and 27 days old... :(

I have to make some additional researches but I want to say you when you are in court-say to judge that if he/she allows the lawsuit it will affect other child,too... It sounds unfair but I have researched some cases as In re -TKY... I have reasons to claim it.

Wow, I have to appluad your determination in all of this. Your wife wronged you and yet you seem so to love her and your children. It takes a special kind of person to face that and still want to continue to be a good husband and father. Keep your head up, don't let those people's sneers get you down! You haven't done anything wrong in any of this and you are a real stand up guy! Good luck to you, your kids are very lucky.. and so is your wife...

I too agree with momtofour, It take a real man to stand against the adversity you face and do the right thing by others. My utmost respect to you and Good Luck.

Please keep us posted.

Thank you very much!!
I had an appointment with my lawyer. I showed her what gv70 posted... GREAT WORK!! Congatulations and THANK YOU! My lawyer said that she missed the condition for Registration With Putative Father Registry!Also she missed some of the cases which you cited.

The court rejected my neighbor's claim.

That takes a load off.

I assume that makes you happy... I hope so anyway. I am glad to hear it.

What about court reasons...

What about court reasons....
Lack of standing.Stability of the family.

Yeah Its not the kids fault. Get a counselor for the kids and the whole family. I wouldn't even tell the kids without the advice of a respectable counselor.
The only thing is that the man who is claiming to be the father, would have no other reason to do so unless he had an interest in the child. This is not exactly a bad thing, although it can feel threatening at times. You and your wife need to get some help together because although it is wrong to cheat, there are obviously reasons she feels and acts the way she does, not that there is an excuse.
I feel for you and I am sorry that this is happening to you right now.