Today is my daughter's birthday. However, she is very disrespectful. She calls names, disrespects our home by damaging the property (hoarding, allowing her son to potty on the floor and not cleaning up, etc). I struggle as I have always made a huge deal out of her birthday. I feel like a fool handing her a gift and treating her as a Queen when last week she called me names and told me to get the F---out of the house that she and my ex husband are renting from me. Maybe I'm being a fool. What would you do to celebrate her birthday if anything? As of yesterday I wasn't even going to go over to see her but then she texted and called several times.

If it were me, I would wrap up an eviction notice and give it to her as a gift.

I would ignore her. Why would you tolerate her crappy behavior? Maybe a good birthday gift would be a doctors name that she could get help with her attitude and behavior.

I like J_9 and talaniman's idea, just make it one package containing both items. Ungrateful Dunce.

Yes, you are being a forgivable fool. Stop all of it. Don't rent to your ex. Don't rent to her. Don't give her birthdays anymore. Don't clean up after her kid.
Craving the love of the past has turned you into a doormat.
Keep some distance until respect is shown, even if it hurts. Doesn't this hurt more than some distance for a while, while you set some rules?

I hope the ex and the daughter is actually paying your rent on time and as they should.

And I would not go visit, I would not see her, until she changes.
If they are living in the same house with you? Kick them out,

I agree with the others you need time away form them.