Hi. You see. I have a Good friend ever since 3 years ago but over time I began to change my impression towards him , the way I treat him. Everything changed. I don't want to name him so I am calling him "J" for the moment.

Back like 3 years ago, we used to be the best of buddies. We would often hang out together , discussed over the online games we play and all the stuff guys would do. We were also in the same Co-Cirucular Activity ( like common school activities for out spare time)

Basically. I am more of the studious type yet can't catch my study topics fast. While he could just slack the whole day and basically understand the topic. At first , few years back this has never been a matter to me. His results could basically top the class to being the lowest in the class.

The second year into our friendship , he went to another class , so I only saw him during my co-cirruclar activitiy. Once in awhile we would go back home together and share what happen in our classes.

But. Into the 3rd year of our friendship ( last year ), things changed. At first , I was joyful to see him back in my class. We were in Secondary 3 ( I think it is 9th grade or something in other countries ) and would be together for another year before we graduate.
It was until the first test that I began to feel angered at him. I knew he did not study for the common test yet he top-ed me. We were always on par on other subjects as well. I began to feel jealous and kept wondering why I could not be like him. From what I know, he always heads home and play games while I have to bury myself in books.

This continued till sec 4 ( Current year ) , now my impression towards him totally changed. Whenever he tags along with me, he is like an nusiance to me. His impressive gaming skills and studies became what I hated most. Sometimes I tried to tell myself to stop it but I could not. Every time he comes to me for help, I would sometimes ignore me or think him as an annoyance. Sometimes I would see him with a crush I have and I wonder why he was any better.

Now I could not even look at him anymore.

I know this sounds childish and plain stupid. I just wanted to see if there's anyway to stop this "Grudge" against him. This was never a burden to me before but I just can't let go of it.

Sorry for wasting your time if this was pathetic and thanks if you gave some opinions.
Thank you!

Acealot1,

I know it can be tough but the only way I think you can get over this is to put things into another perspective. When I was a kid I was very much like your friend, I really didn't have to study much and just got everything really easy on tests. And I had friends who struggled and hated having to work so hard to get good grades. But things really do change in time. When I went to college and things got MUCH harder and I really NEEDED to study I Didn't KNOW HOW!! Everything had come so easy to me that I never learned study skills, so I struggled and struggled and eventually left college. Only recently, almost 18 years later, did I have the courage to go back! You study a lot now, so you are building great skills that will help you to be very successful. It will be your friend who will be needing YOUR help in years to come. Will you give it?

The point I am making is that things really do balance themselves out as you get older. It will happen in life as well as in school. Try to remember WHY the person was your friend. If he was your friend because he cared about you and stood by you when you needed him then he is worth keeping. If he was NEVER a good friend then maybe growing apart is good and consider it part of your life- learning.
Good luck!

I went to school with a guy that could remember anything he ever heard or read. We were friends, but not no where near "best friends" status.

I used to resent him, a little, because like you I had to work for everything. I came to realize that it wasn't his fault that some things came easier for him. Instead of resenting him, why don't you feel good about yourself for your accomplishments?

Acealot1

Your just jealous about your best friend. I have a best friend that I am jealous of but then I just get over it. We are pretty much the same but she is more sportier than me. And good at everything!

Just because your jealous of your friend, your friend might be jealous of you too!:rolleyes: and anyway, since you think that he is a nuisance, and you don't hang around him pretty much, how do you know that he is still playing sport and doing all those activities when he get's home? You know everything changes like a blink of an eye and maybe now he is starting to study while you are not watching him:eek:

I think the best solution is you not being so jealous of him and just be more opened and try to set him as a goal. Don't put all your hates into him after all he is your best friend ( before) and what maked you two best friends before? Is because you like each other! That is why you two were best friends...

If you think that you still have this who heap of anger talk to him and tell him that your not doing that anymore. You shouldn't have jealousy in your mind but actually change it to something different. You will get over if after some time.

I experience that every single day but as I said, try to set him as a goal you need to accomplish or write like a little goal strip, seal it tight in an evelope and at the end of the year you open it up and see what you have accomplished and have you topped him up in grades or is your friendship better?

I think you just need to settle down, have some time to think about it and what you are doing this year. Study extra hard if you think this part is wrong and then this part.

I hope that worked.! :D

thanks everyone for your help! I will try my best to see what I can do. Thank you! =D

I have the same problem its like whatever he does to get me mad I just have to go back to him

People are the way they are I don't ever get jealous I think its great that your friend talent is
Help full to his education
For give yourself and smile...